Countrier Than Thou

Here's a satirical song lyric I wrote a couple of years ago during a particularly overdone round of "country pride" songs on the Nashville charts... Now, with seemingly dozens more country pride songs on the charts and iTunes, as bemoaned on many replies to Country California's recent Questionnaire, it's as timely as ever.

Countrier Than Thou

Backwoods anthems on the radio
Every neck's redder than the one befo'
It's all Skynyrd and pickup trucks
Drinkin, fishin and patriotism
Well boys, if this thing's a competition
I reckon ya'll should just give up

Chorus
Cause I'm countrier than thou, so much countrier than thou
I was born with a plug of Redman in my mouth
Pledge allegiance to the flag, but salute the South
You gotta turn off the rural route to find my house
I'm that much countrier than thou

Raised by my mama in an old deer stand
Built my own pickup with my two bare hands
Wear a cap and a cowboy hat
I'd fight any man but Jesus Christ
Been shot three times and born again twice
I'd like to hear ya'll top that

Hell, I'm countrier than thou, so much countrier than thou
We got a gravel road for Main Street in my hometown
Pledge allegiance to the flag, but salute the South
You gotta turn off the rural route to find my house
I'm that much countrier than thou

Bridge
Tractor, skinny dipping, beer and prison
Kiss my ass if there's anything missin'
Ain't nobody by-God country as me
So don't you never doubt my authenticity

Cause I'm countrier than thou, so much countrier than thou
I learned to drive after I learned to plow
Love to turn Cash, Jones, Cline, Strait, Alan, Hank, Hank Jr., Pride, Conway, Willie and Waylon, Merle and Loretta up real loud
You gotta pull off the rural route to find my house
I'm that much countrier than thou

Spoken tag:
I forget anything? Coe, I love me some Coe! And Skoal!


©2007 Corey Parkman