Feb 20, 2013

Brad Paisley Lyric Parody: Pseudo Country Zone


Pseudo Country Zone
(Parody of Brad Paisley's "Southern Comfort Zone")

When your wheelhouse is the sound of Aldean,
The first time you leave it can be weird, but you're appalling

Not everybody drinks and drives, not everybody is a tool
Not every girl wears cut offs, on dates and job interviews
Not everybody likes to pose or dance around on CMT
Not everybody has to list country things to prove they're country

Oh, douchey man,
You won't understand
When I miss Merle singin' me back home
And I'm tired of pickup truck songs
I will lose IQ points till I go
Outside the pseudo country zone

I have heard the songs of Snow; Jr. ain't the only "Hank"
I don't think a country song should make my speakers crank
I have seen Keith Whitley play at a southern rodeo
He didn't mention pasture fights or bust out a hip-hop flow
I really don't like to see somebody take a pee,
All over the things I cherish like art and honesty

And I miss Merle singin' me back home
And I'm tired of pickup truck songs
I will lose IQ points till I go
Outside the pseudo country zone

I hate your tight jeans and your shakin'
Guitars jamming, disco lights
You're so well-trained at fakin'
Unscuffed Justins, teeth pearly white

I have since become a wanderer
Cause I'm sick of all that crap
Sometimes to find a real treasure
You have to leave the beaten path

Clearchannel's playin' a dick again

And I miss Merle singin' me back home
And I'm tired of pickup truck songs
I will lose IQ points till I go
Outside the pseudo country zone

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