Brad Paisley Lyric Parody: Pseudo Country Zone

Pseudo Country Zone

(Parody of Brad Paisley's "Southern Comfort Zone")

When your wheelhouse is the sound of Aldean,

The first time you leave it can be weird, but you're appalling

Not everybody drinks and drives, not everybody is a tool

Not every girl wears cut offs, on dates and job interviews

Not everybody likes to pose or dance around on CMT

Not everybody has to list country things to prove they're country

Oh, douchey man,

You won't understand

When I miss Merle singin' me back home

And I'm tired of pickup truck songs

I will lose IQ points till I go

Outside the pseudo country zone

I have heard the songs of Snow; Jr. ain't the only "Hank"

I don't think a country song should make my speakers crank

I have seen Keith Whitley play at a southern rodeo

He didn't mention pasture fights or bust out a hip-hop flow

I really don't like to see somebody take a pee,

All over the things I cherish like art and honesty

And I miss Merle singin' me back home

And I'm tired of pickup truck songs

I will lose IQ points till I go

Outside the pseudo country zone

I hate your tight jeans and your shakin'

Guitars jamming, disco lights

You're so well-trained at fakin'

Unscuffed Justins, teeth pearly white

I have since become a wanderer

Cause I'm sick of all that crap

Sometimes to find a real treasure

You have to leave the beaten path

Clearchannel's playin' a dick again

And I miss Merle singin' me back home

And I'm tired of pickup truck songs

I will lose IQ points till I go

Outside the pseudo country zone