May 24, 2012

Larry Lee the Primitive Baptist Reviews: Craig Morgan - Corn Star


(Click title to listen)

I don't get it. Trailer usually sends me vulgar, atrocious songs. This isn't too bad at all. 

It's a celebration of a female corn farmer. Other than the descriptions of her in cut-off shorts and a bikini, there isn't anything here that would make a person think sinful thoughts. Don't get me wrong, putting the thoughts of a lovely country lady in tiny clothing in listeners' heads IS right there on the verge of causing your brother to stumble, but if you have a spotless mind like me, it's no big deal.

Every time I hear of a country girl in a bikini, I picture my wife stuffed in one like a pack of Thomasville sausages and don't feel any lust whatsoever. Much the opposite.

My son-in-law, Jerry, a Southern Baptist, keeps giggling every time I play this song, but I can't understand why. This is an honest, straight-forward ode to a hardworking midwestern farmer who just happens to be a comely young lady. I think Craig Morgan is to be applauded for sending out appreciation for the real people who keep this country going. What's funny about that, Jerry? 

He just asked if I was listening to the soundtrack of "Debbie Does Iowa." I don't catch his drift, but then, those Southern Baptists are a different sort altogether. They think it's okay to drink, so long as you don't speak to one another in the liquor store. 

There he goes again. What in hades is so funny? She's a corn star! 

Well, I'll end this review here. I'm still flabbergasted that Trailer sent me something that doesn't have premarital sex, smoking mary wanna, drinking or any other sinfulness in it. This is a great song that I would be proud to play to my own mother, rest her soul.

Shut up Jerry!

B+

May 23, 2012

Philosoraptor wonders...


CMT Awards: Final Slate of Presenters and Performers


CMT has announced the final slate of presenters and performers for its 2012 CMT Awards telecast, Wednesday, June 6th at 8/7C. As always, it's an interesting mix of entertainers and personalities that's sure to increase your appreciation of country music! Without further adieu...


Insane Clown Posse presenting Best Hick-Hop Artist award

Christian Bale's stunt double

The cast of Bayou Billionaires

Criss Angel

DJ Jazzy Jeff

Survivor winner Kim Spradlin

Larry the Cable Guy

Lindsey Lohan as Liz Taylor

Marilyn Manson performing a tribute to George Lindsey

Marty from Madagascar 3

Nicki Minaj performing with The Pistol Annies

Rebecca Black presenting Female Vocalist of the Year

Andy Samberg

Tom Arnold

Troy Aikman and Hulk Hogan

Waka Flocka performing with Taylor Swift

Bruce Willis and The Rock

Octomom

Old Dirty Bastard hologram

New Hank Williams Jr. Album Cover Revealed


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