Learn Vocabulary with FTM 2

With this helpful guide, you can learn some new words today

that you can pepper into conversations to make people think your more smarter!*

Photo examples are provided to broaden your understanding of the selected words.

Definitions from Google, Dictionary.com, Merriam-Webster, and Urban Dictionary.

*yeah, I know thats ain't right

Country Day Returns, Pt. 3: Luke Bryan, Chris Young, etc.

Honest Billboard Country Chart Feb. 2015

New Video: Chris Young - Lonely Eyes

Worst Country Songs of 2013

I've already talked enough trash about most of the following songs in 2013, so here are the worst country songs of 2013, presented without comment.

Monday Memes: Christmas, Luke Bryan, Duck Dynasty

Honest Billboard Country Airplay Chart

Fantasy Football Teams of the Country Stars IV

Fantasy football is in full swing, entering week 8 of the proceedings. How's your team doing? I won't discuss mine because who cares, right? Anyway, as we've done in the past, FTM has found the team names of several big country stars. Match the logos with the names below! Or don't!

3 Up, 3 Down: October '13

3 Up

Miranda Lambert - All Kinds of Kinds

Quirky… no, downright strange for country radio, this is a song only someone with an established track record like Miranda Lambert could get away with (and she's only managed to barely crack the top 20 with it). It's weird and warm and has hopefully prepared listeners for the next big ode to open-mindedness to hopefully grace the charts, Kacey Musgraves' "Follow Your Arrow."

B

Zac Brown Band - Sweet Annie

Reminiscent of their earlier earthy smash "Colder Weather," "Sweet Annie" is a slow rolling vocally driven gem. It's not pure country, but it's right there in the pocket of what pop-country should sound like in a natural evolution of genre. It's a low-key, high-quality song that hopefully won't be hurt by any higher ups trying to serve out "justice" for Zac's comments about genre cash-cow Puke Bryan.

A

Jason Aldean - Night Train

Yes, I'm serious. No, I'm not testing you. No, please don't shun me. Sure, this isn't traditional-sounding and it's not particularly deep… but it sounds good and isn't a generic party/listing song. There's only a passing mention of a truck. And no cut-off jeans. Aldean usually puts out one single per album that I genuinely enjoy and this is it for the album of the same name. I'll probably never care for Aldean as an artist or person due to his attitude and tendency to put out crap like "1994," but "Night Train" shows that he's got a little more appeal behind the bluster than some of his compadres.

B+

3 Down

Cole Swindell - Chillin' It

An unmemorable voice singing an unremarkable song that sounds like a Florida-Georgia Line album cut. There aren't any particularly embarrassing lyrics in the song, but certainly nothing to hang your new vintage trucker cap on. Oh, and did I mention he used to be Luke Bryan's merch guy? That's got nothing to do with the song sucking but... who am I kidding? Yes it does.

D-

Chris Young - Aw Naw

Thankfully this is one of the 2 or 3 worst songs on his new album. Unfortunately, he'll probably release all of those as singles. Chris wasn't making enough money to keep up with the Aldeans putting out critical favorites like "Neon," so he became a follower of the less talented but more successful members of his genre, and this was the result. A bone-headed partyin' drinkin' anthem that he yells instead of sings.

D (Originally given a C+)

Parmalee - Carolina

These guys switched from mainstream rock to mainstream country without even changing their sound or even remixing this song (not even a token fiddle or steel) and nobody said a word about it. DJ's just bent over and said "put it right here." It's not that this is a terrible song; it's one of the better songs I've heard from Daughtry… I'm just saying it doesn't belong on country radio. Why does country have to be the collection bin of failed pop singers and fake alt-rock bands?

C-

Country "Walk-Up" Songs

Monday evening, Justin Moore tweeted about @MLBFanCave asking him what his "walk up" song would be if he were a baseball player, then asked what the fans thought his answer might have been. Ever the snarky jerks, Reginald Spears and FTM replied "So Small" and "Little Bitty," respectively (but not respectfully). That led to this: FTM ponders what other country singers would use as their perfect "walk up songs" if they were baseball players.

Walk-Up Songs for Country Singers

10. Brantley Gilbert

09. Taylor Swift

08. Tim McGraw

07. Blake Shelton

06. Willie Nelson

05. Sara Evans

04. Jason Aldean

03. Chris Young

02. Luke Bryan

01. Gary Levox

Country Day Aug13 Part 2: The Civil Wars, Chris Young, etc.

Country Day June '13: DAC, Hunter Hayes, Chris Young, etc.

Another shortened edition of Country Day this month. Everything slows down in the summer (even FTM, as I've reduced the amount of posts for a time), including the album release schedule (thus, less covers to farce), so this will likely be the norm through fall.

Chris Young - "Aw Naw": Honest Radio Promo Ad

Single Review: Chris Young - Aw Naw

Chris Young - Aw Naw
(listen here)

Et tu Chris? It seems our boy isn't satisfied with strong airplay, critical approval and selling somewhere in the range of gold with his album releases. Aw naw! It's time Mr. Young stepped into the rarified air of the Aldeans and Sheltons of the world, so here we are. "Aw Naw" isn't as bad as the title or my build-up quite suggest, but it is a step back quality-wise, in my estimation. The guitars are louder than we've ever heard on a Chris Young single. His velvety baritone (one of the best voices in country music, period) becomes more of a talk with the occasional growl. The most obvious shift in Young's commercial presentation is the welcoming in of country buzz words. Patron, partying and painted-on jeans show up for the 16-25 aged suburban country set and I'm sure they'll eat it up. Young is still better than his contemporaries, even with material that is beneath him, so "Aw Naw" comes off a bit like Dale Earnhardt, Jr. driving a Kia. He drives it well, but his talents are more suited for a vehicle with greater power and prestige. The simple fact that an artist of such talent has to drop down a notch to entertain a more casual sort of country fan is disappointing but not surprising. Radio hasn't exactly supported his best material; "Neon" was one of the biggest slights in recent memory. I pray the rest of Young's new album is more reminiscent of his stronger works, his neo-traditional gems and swoon-worthy ballads. "Aw Naw" will likely set the stage for him to move from B-lister to A-lister - let's just hope he doesn't pull a Luke Bryan when he gets there.

My rating:

For the precedent it sets/follows: D-

The song itself: C+

Chris Young Honest Radio Promo Ad

Honest Radio Promo Ad: Jana Kramer

Country Bumper Stickers: Aug '12

3 Up 3 Down: May '12

3 Up

Tim McGraw - Better Than I Used to Be

Sammy Kershaw did this song first, and at least slightly better, but a good song is a good song. It fits the singer, the singer performs the song more than adequately and the song has some weight and a memorable melody. That might be a low standard, but given the context of today's country charts, this is a modern classic. And honestly, I can't turn the station if it's on.

Easton Corbin - Lovin' You is Fun

George Strait v. 2.0 delivers yet another earworm. This guy has a great voice and seems to have a great ear for songs. Lyrically, this would be completely cheesy sung by someone else, but it works with Easton. Catchy, melodious and accessible to anyone who'd still be caught dead listening to Top 40 radio. I'm hoping his album tackles some weightier subject matter and songwriting, but I can't deny this is a good tune.

Chris Young - Neon

The best real country song getting airplay nowadays. It's rising verrrrry slowly up the charts. Hopefully it will follow the success of Alan Jackson's "So You Don't Have to Love Me Anymore" and prove just too damn good not to play…. even though country radio secretly wishes songs of this ilk would disappear forever. It's poetic, catchy and sung with all the baritone country soul Chris Young possesses ….and it mentions Johnny Lee. Can't ask for much more than that on the airwaves these days.

3 Down

Chris Cagle - Got My Country On

I already reviewed this months ago, and hoped it would die a slow death. Unfortunately, here it is in the top 15 and still rising. You know the script by now: trucks, boots, "what I'm made of" sentiment, cowboy hats, Johnny Cash. Bullshit. Chris Cagle has a decent voice and has released some pretty good songs throughout his choppy career, but this isn't one of them. It's a transparent swipe at getting back to relevance, and it's working. Pure, undiluted garbage.

Andy Gibson - Wanna Make You Love Me

I'll make fun of the pretty Andy Gibson at any given chance. "Old people make me cry" is the opening line. 'nuff said. As listing songs go, this is as vague a thread as possible. He lists what certain people and things make him want to do. Seriously. And it's so Lifetime-reality show ready, it's not even funny. I'm a romantic for the most part, and have even been called whipped by friends at times… but this goes beyond the call of duty in pledging love. Give me a break, Andy. This song makes Chuck Wicks sound like Waylon Jennings. Claim your sack back, Andy.

Hunter Hayes - Wanted

Maybe I'm too old, or too far gone from enjoying most pop-country, but this is nearly unlistenable. Maybe it's just that he sounds so much like Gary Levox, you know… Pavlov's dog and all. Some people say there's no denying Hunter Hayes' talent. Is his talent sucking? Just because one is "proficient" at playing instruments and sings in a voice that is pleasing to young girls, that doesn't mean one possesses a universally appreciated skill-set. I'm pretty funny and I do the Photoshop okay, and I can write a decent review at times, but that doesn't mean I'm the most talented blogger in the blogosphere (far from it). Different strokes for different folks and this stroke ain't for me.

FTM's 3rd Anniversary Country Day