Showing posts with label Justin Moore. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Justin Moore. Show all posts

Nov 5, 2014

Make Your Own Taylor Swift 1989 Album Cover

This is kinda old news, but you can still go have some fun with this if you want---> http://www.buzzfeed.com/games/make-your-own-taylor-swift-album-cover
Justin Moore and Brantley Gilbert made their own!



I'm not sure why he looked 35 in 1989, but whatever...

Oct 21, 2014

Anti-FTM Joke Chicken

The anti-joke chicken from the (old) popular meme takes on some of FTM's favorite cliche jokes.





Sep 30, 2014

Gnome Sweet Gnome

 
Gnome Sweet Gnome
(Lyric parody of Motley Crue's "Home Sweet Home" which was recently covered by Justin Moore)

You know I'm a wee man
Barely five foot three
I have to climb on a stool
Just so I can take a pee
Don't put things so high
Way up on that Walmart shelf
Can't reach the Dawn, and can't reach the veal
I'm such an elf

Put me in your lap
Hold me in your hands
Just pick me up
On your shoulders so I
Can see the rock band

I'm in the way
I'm in the way
Gnome sweet gnome...
Petite, petite
I'm in the way
I'm in the way
Gnome sweet gnome...

You know that I wear
Size four boots on my feet and
On my bus, got my own
Graco car seat

I'm just like a leprechaun
Short legs and T-rex arms
And you know no one
No one's gonna get
Me Lucky Charms

I'm in the way
I'm in the way
Gnome sweet gnome...
Half pint, half pint
I'm in the way
I'm in the way
Gnome sweet gnome...

Gnome sweet gnome...
Gnome sweet gnome...
Gnome sweet gnome...

I'm in the way
I'm in the way
Gnome sweet gnome...

Hey!

I'm in the way
I'm in the way
Gnome sweet gnome...

Sep 19, 2014

Bro-Country Fan eCards: Sept. '14

These are actual YouTube comments from bro-country fans, edited only for R-rated language.





Sep 18, 2014

Small Town Douchebag


 Small Town Douchebag
(Lyric parody of Brantley Gilbert/Thomas Rhett/Justin Moore's "Small Town Throwdown")

Oh bruh

Around these parts his kind ain't new
No job but drives a jacked Chevrolet
Plays rap-rock, tatts on neck
3 kids from 3 girls on the way
Runs stop signs

Got a party at his folks' house tonight
Hand on his crotch, drinkin' fake shine
He loves gauge earrings and skanky girls,
Never got a ticket, claims he's done time

He's a small town douchebag
He loves to squall his tires and call people fags
And dawg, where da hoes tonight, drinkin' Natty gettin' tight
Skinny jeans or a sag, he's a small town douchebag

Yo, who got some ganja son?

Now he's got a house full of dumbass bros
Round here they're common as grass is
Rockin' Lil Wayne and FGL
Tore up, showin' their asses

What you looking at man?

Somebody says there's college boys
Rollin' in to hook up with their b**ches
If they step in there usin' fancy words
He's gonna send 'em home in stitches

He's a small town douchebag
His mean mug takes over when his brain power lags
And dawg, where da hoes tonight, drinkin' High Life gettin' tight
Fly high that rebel flag, he's a small town douchebag

C'mon

He's a small town douchebag
He loves to squall his tires and call people fags
And dawg, where da hoes tonight, drinkin' Taaka gettin' tight
Skinny jeans or a sag, he's a small town douchebag

He's a small town douchebag
He loves to squall his tires and call people fags
And dawg, where da hoes tonight, drinkin' Natty gettin' tight
Skinny jeans or a sag, he's a small town douchebag

He's a small town douchebag

WTF

Sep 11, 2014

Little Known Facts: September '14




Lefty Frizzell was ambidextrous.

Creed's Scott Stapp considered making a country album but decided
against it because "the scene is just too douchey right now."

For every number 1 single Rascal Flatts has Gary Levox
celebrates by literally adding a notch to his belt.

Due to his reputation for making subpar music Chris Gaines decided
to make his comeback under the stage name Garth Brooks.

Justin Moore started singing country music after his "little luchador"
career ended with a mis-timed hurricanrana.

Thanks to quick actions from a bystander who applied pressure to the wound,
the man Johnny Cash shot in Reno lived until 2007.

Taylor Swift says she hasn't dated in over a year, so her next album
will be entirely about collecting cats and eating Blue Bell by the quart.

Little Big Town is a bad good band.

Each year, Lee Greenwood goes into hibernation
from November 12 through the last Sunday in May.

Sam Hunt is so country, he once got barbecue sauce on his vintage mesh yellow polo.

Jason Brown changed his name to Colt Ford to avoid being confused with his younger brother Chris Brown.

Despite FTM's constant jokes, Brantley Gilbert has only tried meth once and he didn't like it.
(Then he tried it 64 more times and didn't like it any of those times either.)

On the grounds of Toby Keith's Norman, OK farm/estate, there is a life-sized bronze statue of Toby Keith.


By Trailer and Jeremy Harris

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