Showing posts with label Tyler Hubbard. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tyler Hubbard. Show all posts

Aug 5, 2015

Little Known Facts: August 2015


Def Leppard will be reissuing their entire catalog and sending all singles to country radio.
No remastering or editing will be performed.

Chase Rice has a punch card for the health department: collect 11 std's, get the 12th visit free.

I recently asked Ray Wylie Hubbard how it felt to be the second most successful Hubbard
in country music after Tyler. I wrote these facts while recovering in the hospital.

According to a recent interview with SavingCountryMusic.com Steven Tyler's two biggest 
pet peeves are: 1. People saying his country single sucks. 2. Online petitions asking him to
turn in his 1976 decathlon gold metal.

Bill Cosby knows every Tyler Farr song by heart.

With their upcoming album, The Damn Quails hope to surpass Texas rapper Lyndon U. MyJohnson 
as the most successful musical act to name themselves after a vice president's name.
 *editor's note: Yes, I know…

Blake Shelton filed for divorce after hearing that Ol' Red had began to play the field.

Elizabeth Cook once knocked Ronda Rousey out in a bar fight.

Shooter Jennings was nearly killed while playing in a McDonald's playland ball-pit
when Gary Levox confused him for an abandoned Chicken McNugget.

Jason Isbell was the only artist on the Billboard country top ten that had
heard of all the artists in the top ten last week.

When you play a Sam Hunt song backwards it's still not country.

Bucky Covington was recently fired from Apple as the person typing
your message when you use speak to text on an iPhone.

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92% of these written by Jeremy Harris

Apr 14, 2015

Country Singer Anagrams III

an·a·gram

ˈanəˌgram/
noun
a word, phrase, or name formed by rearranging the letters of another, such as cinema, formed from iceman.





Feb 11, 2015

Blame Georgia

 Blame Georgia
(Lyric parody of South Park's "Blame Canada")

Times are strange
Our kids are getting dumb
They won't respect tradition
They just want to bang and bump

Should we blame the school system?
Or blame bad parenting?
Or should we blame the X-Box?

No, blame Georgia!

Blame Georgia!

With all their trashy tailgate songs
And the studded jeans that they've got on

Blame Georgia! Blame Georgia!

It's time these idiots got caught
It's Georgia's fault!

Don't blame me if I lose my mind
I hear that damn Brantley and Jason and Luke all the time!

And Dallas Davidson, he's from Georgia as well
By now it's time we told them all just to go to hell

Yeah, blame Georgia!

Blame Georgia!

It seems that country music just sucks
Since Georgia discovered trucks

Blame Georgia!
Blame Georgia!

That's not even real country music anyway

My son should've been a scientist or a banker just as well
But all he wants to do is roll coal and go chasing tail

Should we blame ol Waylon?
Should we blame Paycheck?
Nah, blame Tyler Hubbard and Thomas Rhett.

That's it!

Blame Georgia! Blame Georgia!

With all their douchey hick-hoppin' crap
They can leap off Wolf Pen Gap

Blame Georgia! Shame on Georgia for...
The bros, we're so bored
And yeah, for Colt Ford
The Fireball and butts must all be undone
We must shame them and send them on the run
Oh, all this shitty music must be shunned

Blame Georgia! Blame Georgia!


-----------------------------
Don't take this too seriously, Georgians. 
Yes, we know Georgia is actually responsible for many more positives than negatives in country music. 
Just might wanna get some stuff in check in the present.

Aug 28, 2014

The Return of FTM's Worst Series: Country Stars With F'ed Up Teeth

"Country Stars with F'ed Up Teeth" is definitely the worst, most tasteless, least creative, most sophomoric
post series FTM has ever done. So it's back... (for today anyway)









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