Showing posts with label bro country. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bro country. Show all posts
Mar 14, 2017
Just Shut Up, Bro
Labels:
Brantley Gilbert,
bro country,
memes,
Satire,
Sturgill Simpson
Feb 24, 2017
If These Pop Hits Were Bro-Country
Ed Sheeran - Shape of You
Come over in that short skirt and holler at me
Those red cherry lips got me like wow
Take my hand, dance, to Luke Bryan on the jukebox
And then we go to the truck, and now I'm like what what
Come over in that short skirt and holler at me
Those red cherry lips got me like wow
Take my hand, dance, to Luke Bryan on the jukebox
And then we go to the truck, and now I'm like what what
Chainsmokers ft. Halsey - Closer
So, hey girl, pull me closer
In the back seat of my Raptor
Migos rattling my Ford
Tribal tattoo on my shoulder
So, hey girl, pull me closer
In the back seat of my Raptor
Migos rattling my Ford
Tribal tattoo on my shoulder
Migos - Bad and Boujee
Black top, truck stop (truck stop)
Turning in a field where the girls hot (hot hot)
Light up a bonfire, the party hop hop hop (hop)
Pass the Fireball, I want a shot (shot)
Black top, truck stop (truck stop)
Turning in a field where the girls hot (hot hot)
Light up a bonfire, the party hop hop hop (hop)
Pass the Fireball, I want a shot (shot)
Lady Gaga - Million Reasons
Country girl in my Chevy, got one hand on the wheel
If you could see it my way, You'd let me grab a feel
Girl your fresh produce is always in season
Country girl in my Chevy, got one hand on the wheel
If you could see it my way, You'd let me grab a feel
Girl your fresh produce is always in season
The Weeknd - Starboy
I'm tryna get you in the right mood, yep
Riding cleaner than some new boots, yep
Those tan lines and eyes of blue, yep
Got me wanting to go screw, yep
I'm tryna get you in the right mood, yep
Riding cleaner than some new boots, yep
Those tan lines and eyes of blue, yep
Got me wanting to go screw, yep
Sam Hunt - Body Like a Back Road
***no changes***
Got a girl from the south side, got braids in her hair
First time I seen her walk by, man I 'bout fell off my chair
Had to get her number, it took me like six weeks
Now me and her go way back like Cadillac seats
Got a girl from the south side, got braids in her hair
First time I seen her walk by, man I 'bout fell off my chair
Had to get her number, it took me like six weeks
Now me and her go way back like Cadillac seats
Labels:
bro country,
Chainsmokers,
Ed Sheeran,
Lady Gaga,
Migos,
parody,
Sam Hunt,
The Weeknd
Feb 16, 2017
Stupidity is More Than Skin Deep
Labels:
bro country,
memes,
Satire
Jan 25, 2017
Tom T. Hall Goes Bro-Country
I Love
(Parody of Tom T. Hall's "I Love")
I love Powerstrokin' trucks, Swingin' truck nutz
Wearin' camo tanks, and skanks
I love blinding LEDs, wearin' skinny jeans
Calling people gay, Axe spray
And I love big boobs
I love tatted up skin, Instagrammed rear ends
T-shirts of Merle, but not Merle
I love Fireball in a cup, getting turnt up
Miller in a glass, and ass
And I love big boobs
I love making bitches smile, rolling coal for miles
Watching fights on Vine and stuntin'
I love unprotected sex, not sending child support checks
Music when it's Drake and Plies
And I love sweet nudes
Wearin' camo tanks, and skanks
I love blinding LEDs, wearin' skinny jeans
Calling people gay, Axe spray
And I love big boobs
I love tatted up skin, Instagrammed rear ends
T-shirts of Merle, but not Merle
I love Fireball in a cup, getting turnt up
Miller in a glass, and ass
And I love big boobs
I love making bitches smile, rolling coal for miles
Watching fights on Vine and stuntin'
I love unprotected sex, not sending child support checks
Music when it's Drake and Plies
And I love sweet nudes
Labels:
bro country,
Drake,
Parody lyrics,
Plies,
Satire,
Tom T. Hall
Dec 13, 2016
Rockin' Around in Skinny Jeans
(I wrote a whole Christmas song parody around @fiveoletsgo 's title.)
Rocking Around in Skinny Jeans
(FTM Lyrical Satirical)
Rocking around in skinny jeans
at the Christmas party, brah
Some mistletoe hung where chicks can see
It's hanging above my crotch
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Makes the chain on my wallet ring
Later we'll do some body shots
and auto-tuned caroling
You will feel just like a Yuletime baller
You will feel just like a Yuletime baller
When you hear, voices holler
"Let's be merry; Pour me some Goose and cranberry"
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Have a lit ol' holiday
Everyone stumble drunkenly
Round a bonfire of stolen crates
You will feel a little something something
You will feel a little something something
When you see fists are pumping
"Crank some Future; pour a line of Fireball shooters"
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Now it's time to spit some game
Take this ho ho ho dancing merrily
To my jacked up Christmas sleigh
Labels:
bro country,
Christmas,
Fireball,
Future,
Luke Bryan,
Lyrical Satirical,
Parody lyrics,
Satire
Nov 16, 2016
Who's Gonna Fill 'em?
I'm getting so (old and) forgetful, I wrote this without recalling we'd already posted something
similar in the past (as if we don't recycle jokes daily). Anyway, my version more closely fits
the real lyrics and contains current details, even if Marilyn Branson's is funnier and has the
benefit of a great tune and production (below my lyrics).
Who's Gonna Fill Their Shoes
(A parody of George Jones' "Who's Gonna Fill Their Shoes")
You know this old world is full of singers
But just a few are chosen
To get it crunk up when they sing
Imagine life without them
All your bro country heroes
Like the cornball that wears those skinny jeans
No, there will never be another
Fat-headed Jason
Face painted black and fist bumping dudes
The dopey Voice host Okie
No what up darlin'
Lord I wonder, who's gonna fill their shoes
[Chorus:]
Who's gonna fill their shoes
Who's gonna yell yeehaw!
Who's gonna sing of hotties
And drinking sweet Fireball
Who's gonna show us how they roll
And sound so auto-tuned
Lord I wonder, who's gonna fill their shoes
God bless the boy from Georgia
Grinding with his pelvis
Singing about shaking it and beers
He sure rocks those skinnies
And really crashed the party
And "That's My Kind of Night" brings me to tears
You know the heart of bro country music
Still beats in Brantley Gilbert
Echoes cross that Florida-Georgia Line
Ol' Hubbard and Brian Kelley
Why I can feel them right here with me
In this chromed out Raptor rolling through the night
[Chorus:]
Who's gonna fill their shoes
Who's gonna yell yeehaw!
Who's gonna sing of hotties
And drinking sweet Fireball
Who's gonna show us how they roll
And take us on a cruise
Lord I wonder, who's gonna fill their shoes
Yes I wonder, who's gonna be a douche?
You know this old world is full of singers
But just a few are chosen
To get it crunk up when they sing
Imagine life without them
All your bro country heroes
Like the cornball that wears those skinny jeans
No, there will never be another
Fat-headed Jason
Face painted black and fist bumping dudes
The dopey Voice host Okie
No what up darlin'
Lord I wonder, who's gonna fill their shoes
[Chorus:]
Who's gonna fill their shoes
Who's gonna yell yeehaw!
Who's gonna sing of hotties
And drinking sweet Fireball
Who's gonna show us how they roll
And sound so auto-tuned
Lord I wonder, who's gonna fill their shoes
God bless the boy from Georgia
Grinding with his pelvis
Singing about shaking it and beers
He sure rocks those skinnies
And really crashed the party
And "That's My Kind of Night" brings me to tears
You know the heart of bro country music
Still beats in Brantley Gilbert
Echoes cross that Florida-Georgia Line
Ol' Hubbard and Brian Kelley
Why I can feel them right here with me
In this chromed out Raptor rolling through the night
[Chorus:]
Who's gonna fill their shoes
Who's gonna yell yeehaw!
Who's gonna sing of hotties
And drinking sweet Fireball
Who's gonna show us how they roll
And take us on a cruise
Lord I wonder, who's gonna fill their shoes
Yes I wonder, who's gonna be a douche?
Oct 6, 2016
Top 10 Conspiracies Shooter Jennings Can Cover Next
To celebrate the release of the Black Ribbons Ultimate Edition, Shooter Jennings has been running a podcast recently called Beyond the Black. In it he discusses the conspiracy-minded topics covered on that dystopian album. Jeremy counted down the best topics Shooter can cover on future episodes!
(and it's a top 11)
Top 11 Upcoming Topics For
Shooter Jennings' Beyond The Black Podcasts
11. David Allan Coe was never picked up by the ghost of Hank Williams.
10. All Colt Ford songs are secretly written about independent wrestler Die Hard Tom McClane.
9. Bambi's mom was an inside job.
8. Earl Thomas Conley schedules his tour dates around the Seattle Seahawks schedule. Coincidence?
7. 'Walking Dead' scenes that show destroyed urban areas are actually drone footage from outdoor bro-country concerts.
6. The earth is a simulation created by Richard Garriott.
5. Randy Quaid and Gary Levox have never been seen together. Tune in to find out why.
4. Proof that Sturgill Simpson is actually a reptile alien made of light.
3. Detroit was booming until Kid Rock went country. The connection is there!
2. Two members of Jackson Taylor's band are NOT sinners.
1. Billy
Ray Cyrus died in a rollerblading accident and was saved when doctors
working as consultants on the show 'Doc' stole Elvis' brain and
implanted it into his head. The show was cancelled shortly after because
he constantly wanted to sing 'Love Me Tender' during every episode.
(This title may need to be shortened before airing the show)
-by Jeremy Harris
Oct 4, 2016
Sep 12, 2016
Monday Morning Memes: Angry Aldean Edition
Labels:
bro country,
Florida Georgia Line,
Jason Aldean,
Luke Bryan,
memes,
Satire,
Whitey Morgan
Jun 28, 2016
If Dallas Davidson Had Written These Summer Classics
FTM ponders what these classic summer hits would have sounded like
if Dallas Davidson or any of his compadres had written them...
The Lovin' Spoonful - Summer in the City
Don't care bout summer in the city
Spent my whole check on Bud Light and a Yeti
Leave town, cranking up some Diddy
Ain't it sweet to have a girl who's drunk and pretty
DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince - Summertime
And think of the summers chasing ass
Connect the Bluetooth and let the Beats™ Pill blast
Or plug my aux cord and let G-Eazy rhyme and put your truck
In mud, get a dip, 'cause this is summertime
Bananarama - Cruel Summer
Hot country beats
On the gravel we're swerving
Are you down?
Trying to score but
The beer got me wanting to fight
Dwight Yoakam is playing
(Wait, who is that?)
Nah, play some Gucci Mane
Getting loose in the country
This heat got her
Right out her jeans
It's a lit (lit) lit summer
Let's shoot some nudes on my phone
It's a lit (lit) lit summer
Get it on
Don Henley - Boys of Summer
Down on the farm today, I saw a deadmau5 sticker on a Chevrolet
…
I can see you-
Your tan lines glowin' in the sun
You got that ass dropped down and those blue Costas on, baby
And I can tell you I'll keep your number in my phone
After the bros of summer have gone
LFO - Summer Girls
(no changes)
(no changes)
Jun 20, 2016
Monday Morning Memes: Luke Bryan, Luke Bell, Bobby Bones, Bros
Labels:
Batman and Robin,
Bobby Bones,
bro country,
Johnny Cash,
Kane Brown,
Luke Bell,
Luke Bryan,
memes,
Satire
Jun 10, 2016
The Truth About Country Pasture Parties in 2016
2016 Country Throwdown
(Drunk People Looking at Their Phones)
©2016 Farce the Music Satires
I've seen all those videos
Booty shaking girls and bros
All dancing around a big ol' bonfire
That's something I would like to see
And Billy Dukes invited me
So I put gravel underneath my tires
Got out past the county line
Dreaming of hotties and shine
Cold ones loaded in a Yeti I just bought
Followed that big cloud of dust
Crossed the ditch and there I was
Ready to throw down and this is what I saw
Chorus
Drunk people looking at their phones
Drunk people looking at their phones
Buncha Country Outfitter clones
One guy cranking a Yeezy song
and drunk people looking at their phones
Girls weren't shaking what they had
Just tapping screens and looking mad
No keg stands, nobody kicking up their boots
Bros weren't fighting, causing scenes
Just sharing "crying Jordan" memes
Shook my head thinkin' "Is this what's it's all come to?"
Drunk people looking at their phones
Drunk people looking at their phones
Circle of trucks with their shining chrome
One guy cranking a 2 Chainz song
and drunk people looking at their phones
Bridge
I need a word with Mr. Luke Bryan
and I guess Florida-Georgia's lyin'
Cause all I see is
Drunk people looking at their phones
Drunk people looking at their phones
No skinny dipping, no punches thrown
Just one guy cranking a Sam Hunt song
and drunk people looking at their phones
©2016 Farce the Music Satires
I've seen all those videos
Booty shaking girls and bros
All dancing around a big ol' bonfire
That's something I would like to see
And Billy Dukes invited me
So I put gravel underneath my tires
Got out past the county line
Dreaming of hotties and shine
Cold ones loaded in a Yeti I just bought
Followed that big cloud of dust
Crossed the ditch and there I was
Ready to throw down and this is what I saw
Chorus
Drunk people looking at their phones
Drunk people looking at their phones
Buncha Country Outfitter clones
One guy cranking a Yeezy song
and drunk people looking at their phones
Girls weren't shaking what they had
Just tapping screens and looking mad
No keg stands, nobody kicking up their boots
Bros weren't fighting, causing scenes
Just sharing "crying Jordan" memes
Shook my head thinkin' "Is this what's it's all come to?"
Drunk people looking at their phones
Drunk people looking at their phones
Circle of trucks with their shining chrome
One guy cranking a 2 Chainz song
and drunk people looking at their phones
Bridge
I need a word with Mr. Luke Bryan
and I guess Florida-Georgia's lyin'
Cause all I see is
Drunk people looking at their phones
Drunk people looking at their phones
No skinny dipping, no punches thrown
Just one guy cranking a Sam Hunt song
and drunk people looking at their phones
Labels:
2 Chainz,
bro country,
Florida Georgia Line,
Kanye West,
Luke Bryan,
Lyrical Satirical,
Sam Hunt,
Satire,
Trucks
May 23, 2016
Mar 15, 2016
The Bros Go On Forever and the Party Never Ends
Labels:
bro country,
Jon Langston,
memes,
Satire
Mar 7, 2016
Monday Morning Memes: FGL, Kane Brown, Luke's Jeans, etc.
Labels:
bro country,
Florida Georgia Line,
Johnny Cash,
Kane Brown,
Luke Bryan,
memes,
Satire
Feb 24, 2016
Feb 2, 2016
Dec 17, 2015
Country Style!
Law of natural selection at work. |
Here's a satirical lyric sent to us by singer/songwriter Jeff Przech. You can almost hear Cole Swindell singing if you just imagine...
And go check out Jeff's music here! His 2015 album Sounds Like Fresh is a catchy mix of Americana, alt-country, and pop rock.
COUNTRY STYLE
(To the tune of… pretty much anything else on country radio….)
Moonlight shines down on the lake and over to the sand
Passes right through these Corona bottles, got one in each hand
I’ll take off my white t-shirt so you can’t see the stain
And if your peach wine cooler tastes like roofies, darlin’, that I can’t explain
There’s a lake right here in front of us, why don’t we jump right in
And I’ll find a place on that bod of yours the mosquitoes haven’t been
Doin’ it Country Style, gettin’ wild, girl you look so fine
Like a breakfast special at the Cracker Barrel for $7.99
Do it Country Style, wet and wild, girl we got it made
And it don’t bother me that you just passed the seventh grade
That’s Country Style
Watch them Daisy Dukes with eyes wide open as they slide down past your knees
See them goosebumps rising on your ass caused by the summer breeze
The wind is warm but the water’s gold, damn that’s just my luck
Now the only nuts you’ll see are the ones that are hanging off my truck
The night is hot and so am I so girl, don’t make me wait
All over you like the Nascar sticker on my Chevrolet tailgate
Gonna do it Country Style, gettin’ wild, girl you look so fine
Like the high school football team I’m gonna touchdown on you tonight
Do it Country Style, wet and wild, girl you make me wanna sing
Have another shot of this Fireball and you won’t feel a thing
That’s Country Style
(90’s Alt Rock Guitar solo)
Got my ball cap pulled down nice and low, think I’ve had enough
I should be at that Florida Georgia line by the time that you wake up
Baby I got your number but don’t be waitin’ for me to call
Three and a half minutes of magic is what you get and that’s all
Do it Country Style, gettin’ wild, girl you look so fine
Don’t you message me if you happen to see those pics I took online
Do it Country Style, wet and wild, girl we got it made
Me and my bros and the redneck hoes throwin’ up some shade
That’s Country Style
That’s Country Style
Dec 10, 2015
A Subpar Stick Figure Comic About Country Radio
Labels:
bro country,
cartoon,
Chris Stapleton,
comics,
Country Radio,
Kelsea Ballerini
Nov 2, 2015
Coexist? Nah...
Labels:
Axe Spray,
bro country,
Country Bumper Stickers,
Fireball,
Satire,
Trucks,
Wallet Chains,
Yeti
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