Jul 13, 2012

Happy Friday the 13th!





*Farce the Music in no way wishes that Jason Voorhees was real and about to kill Scott Borchetta with a huge fucking machete.

YouTube Gems: Ty Segall Band

Not an official video, but a cool one. Here's Ty Segall Band with "Tell Me What's Inside Your Heart" from their album, Slaughterhouse. RIYL: Japandroids, The Troggs, Titus Andronicus, etc.

Dope Rhymes Luke Bryan 5


Jul 12, 2012

Single Review: Moonshine Bandits - Super Goggles



I'd rather listen to fresh dog feces steaming in a hot summer backyard. I'd rather listen to Nicki Minaj sing the National Anthem. I'd rather listen to a possum stuck in a barbed wire fence. You get the point.

In a year pock-marked by superstars seeing who can outdo the last with the biggest festering pile of crap tagged with mp4 or mp3, this, from the utterly talentless Moonshine Bandits, ups the ante on all of them. What you got Luke Bryan?

At least iTunes has the decency to put this song in the "alternative" category rather than country, but make no mistake, this is marketed as country music. What's country about it, you ask (I know you didn't ask that, but hypothetically)? Um, let me think. Give me a minute. Uhh. Hmmm. Well, the band is called the Moonshine Bandits. That's pretty country, right?

This is a rap song about how all the girls get prettier at closing time. Hey, that's catchy. Somebody should write a song with that line in it. Anyway, the chorus is some white dude singing through the T-Pain app on his iPhone. The verses are just sub-par rapping about getting drunk and 2's turning into 7's (at least they aren't setting their sights too high, have you seen these guys?). Hey, they mentioned Jimmy Super Fly Snuka in one of the verses. Wrasslin' is pretty country! I stand corrected. This IS a country song. 

Charlie Worsham's dad had this wonderful comment on the Taste of Country post about this song:
"Just imagine how much better Hank Williams, Loretta Lynn, Conway Twitty, George Jones, etc. could have sounded if they had been autotuned and had great, meaningful lyrics like this. Maybe they could have even gone on to be in the Country Music Hall of Fame. Hopefully, we will see more really awesome groups like this in the future. They certainly have a wonderful look and are sure to last for years and years. Talent like this only come around once in a lifetime. Awesome boys."

I think ol' Gary's been reading Farce the Music!

F-

New Brantley Gilbert Single Cover Revealed


There's the new single cover for the song below.*


Well, that song should do pretty well at hard rock radio. What? Country radio? Seriously? Oh... oh no.

*Hey dumb people: this is satire, not real. I mean, the song is actually a country single, but that cover is fake and Brantley is probably not a Satanist.

Honest Tim McGraw Radio Promo Ad for Curb


Jul 11, 2012

Timely Luke Bryan Meme


Cody James Boots Review and GIVEAWAY!

Contest No Longer Active



The fine folks at Boot Barn have quite a treat for one of my readers. One of you will win your very own pair of the popular Cody James boots. I'll tell you how in a minute. Don't worry if you're not a cowboy; these boots are just as great for heading out to a bar for a country show or throwing a few lines down by the farm pond. 

I don't just say this because they hooked me up with my very own Distressed Square Toe boots, (the winner can choose from any of the Cody James boot styles) but these are by far the most comfortable pair I've ever owned. They're every bit as supportive through the ankle as any work boots I've owned too. They have a breathable lining and insole and that came in handy recently as I wore them for an all day outing at my family's rural land in South Mississippi. It was one of those 98º with 95% humidity days that make the deep south such an oven in the summer. TMI maybe, but my feet didn't sweat at all in these boots. 

Even walking on our hilly land and around the muddy edges of one of our ponds as my son and cousin took a dip, the heels didn't slip. Now sure, I haven't put these through the paces just yet - I'm no cowboy, obviously - but they've been perfectly suited for every activity I've used them for.

I'm one of those people who'd just as soon go barefooted all the time or wear the lightest shoes possible, but the weight of the boots is nearly unnoticeable. They fit closely but not tightly around the leg and they move with me as fluidly as my jeans.

Oh, did I mention the look? These boots look great! They're rugged and understated, but have beautifully crafted stitched designs on the sides. I couldn't have found something more perfectly suited to my style. They have some flashier numbers, to be sure, but I love this particular look.

Now, if you want to go ahead and find your own pair, head on over to Boot Barn and find your fit. Or you can try your luck with Farce the Music first!

All you have to do to win your own pair of Cody James boots (again, the winner can choose from any of the Cody James boot styles) is comment here, on Facebook or Twitter and tell me the name of your favorite song about western life, cowboys or boots. That's it. Get your entry in by Monday, July 16. I'll choose a name from the hat and announce a winner next week. However, due to some issues with contests in the past, after I announce the winner, they'll have to email me their information within 3 days or the boots will go to the next selection (and so on).

So get on it! Tell me your favorite western song, whether it be a Bob Wills classic or a deep cut from an early 90s Garth Brooks album. Let's have it!

A Special Message from Chris Cagle


Jul 10, 2012

Jason Aldean's New Single Is Called What?


Feel Bad For You Mixtape: July '12

July's edition of the monthly mixtape put together by like-minded bloggers and music fans with varied tastes includes Arliss Nancy, Neil Young & Crazy Horse, Lyle Lovett, Japandroids, Muddy Waters and more. Stream on the cassette tape player below or visit the site to comment on or download the mixtape!



Top 10 Things Brantley Gilbert Tattoo Owners are Also the Owners Of 2



9. Meth Mouth



6. More than 4 children with more than 4 mothers or fathers

5. This t-shirt. (NSFW)

4. An outstanding arson warrant


2. A tan like this

1. A truck with a $1600 system, $5500 in tires and wheels and $0 insurance

Jul 9, 2012

Carrie Underwood Meme


OMG Reviews: Jason Eady - AM Country Heaven



by Brittany Fant, 14-year-old music fan and aspiring reviewer


Here's a link to the album, but DON'T BUY IT IT SUCKS!


What is going on here? This guy is talking bad about country music!!! I'm a new fan of country music and I won't put up with this. Who is he? I don't see his name anywhere on the top 40 songs chart. I do see Hunter Hayes' name!!!! Enough said, Jason. Really, what have you done to be able to put down country music like this? All your songs are sad and your voice is sooooooooooooooooooo depressing. That's not real country music! Real country music is only sad like on one song per album. The rest of it is about partying and love!! And driving around in a truck. You don't have a song on this album about driving around in a truck, so you must be from the city! That's okay, I'm from the suburbs myself, but I have trees in my yard and my dad has a F-150 so I'm real country! Brantley Gilbert is kind of scary but he sings about real country stuff like girls in cut off jeans and Hank, so he's real country. Jason Eady said he just turned 35 on one song. LOL! OLD! No wonder he's talking bad about the AWESOME music on the radio. He's probably playing shuffleboard at the nursing home and complaining about the pistachio pudding being warm. LOL LOL. He's so out of touch, he thinks LMFAO is a toy store. His voice sounds too real - hasn't he heard of autotune???? This album is so depressing I could only listen to like 30 seconds of each song. Except that first one where he disses REAL COUNTRY MUSIC. He is a bitter loser who can't get played on the radio with people who deserve it like Luke Bryan and Jason Aldean. He should listen to some Hunter Hayes and lighten up or learn to play a guitar that's actually plugged in, LOL. OLD! You go girl!


Even though he's decrepit and scruffy, he's kinda cute so I'll give him 1/2 heart hands.



New Kix Brooks Album Cover Revealed


Country Memes: Tim McGraw, Luke Bryan, Brantley Gilbert





Jul 5, 2012

Favorite Songs Ever: The White Stripes - Dead Leaves and the Dirty Ground

Favorite Songs Ever: Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg - Nothin' But a G Thang

Favorite Songs Ever: Drive-by Truckers - Never Gonna Change

Favorite Songs Ever: Chris Knight - It Ain't Easy Being Me

Favorite Songs Ever: Metallica - Seek and Destroy

Favorite Songs Ever: The Rolling Stones - Under My Thumb

Favorite Songs Ever: Merle Haggard - Silver Wings

Favorite Songs Ever: Otis Redding - I've Been Loving You Too Long

Single Review: Tim McGraw - Truck Yeah


When Lil' Wayne is mentioned in the first line of a "country" song, you know it's a trucked up situation. Sure, country music has been using the "almost cursing, but not" gimmick for a few years now: Sugarland's "It Happens" and Blake Shelton's "Some Beach" spring to mind. I suppose this is the trucking logical furthest step in that progression. Still, it's pretty Ram® disconcerting that it's come to this. 

The guitars on "Truck Yeah" are jacked up as a son of a trailer hitch. The lyrics are smother ducking full of hip-hop slang. Subject matter-wise (trucks, clubs, partying), if any new ground is broken here, I'll kiss your brass. The musical hook would be better described as dam.. I mean, darned (whoops, almost said a naughty word!) annoying, rather than catchy.

So basically, all we've got here is a pop country rocker (leaning towards the latter, obviously) whose ONLY brother plucking selling point is that it's built around almost saying a curse word. Boy, it takes a big ol' pair of vest nickels to write something like that, huh? No, not really. Pop music has had songs about trucking around and getting spit-faced for years, country's just catching up, in "edge" if not subject matter. Unless you're a Clearchannel chum muzzler, you can't be happy with where this genre is headed.

"Truck Yeah" is a piece of grit, and if you don't agree with this review, you better duck my kick!

F

Favorite Songs Ever: Johnny Cash - I Still Miss Someone

Favorite Songs Ever: The Refreshments - Mekong

From one of my top 10 albums ever, Fizzy Fuzzy Big and Buzzy, here's "Mekong" from The Refreshments.

Favorite Songs Ever: Uncle Tupelo - Whiskey Bottle

Today, for Farce the Music's 4th birthday (anniversary, whatever...), I'm going to mostly post videos of a selection of my all-time favorite songs. I'll also post a review of a certain current, conspicuously awful song, but good music will be the order of the day. First up, here's Uncle Tupelo with "Whiskey Bottle."

Jul 4, 2012

Country Fireworks!

Have a good time with your grilling, drinking and firework shooting today, but please be careful if you pick up any of the following fireworks products!

Kids buy 'em because the packaging looks cool. Cheap and cheaply made.
When you light them, all they do is hiss and emit a cloud of smoke and, at best, 
build a tiny pile of insignificant, foul-smelling ash.

Kids adore them! Cheap and flashy.
People over the age of 25 realize that they aren't actual fireworks, just
crappy novelties good for 2-3 minutes of "fun."



Pretend to be a stronger version of a bomb that was outlawed years ago.
Really just a renamed and repackaged version of what they already sold in the first place.
Makes a loud noise, but doesn't have much power.

Happy Independence Day!

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