Mar 21, 2015

From the Archives: She's COUNTRIER

Originally Posted November 17, 2009

She's Countrier: A Satire

This is a send-up of all the "my woman is a real country gal" songs... (She's Country in particular)

She's Countrier

She was breach born in a Silverado
Raised in shed in a backwoods hollow
Fed cold collards, cheese and pimento
Smelling pig crap every time the wind blows

Yeah, we're from the same bloodline
But the reason that she's mine

She's countrier
Than a muddy ol' fat sow
She's countrier
The girl can work a plow
You wanna see cornfed, better come see her
Your girl might be country but she's countrier

She drinks moonshine like its faucet water
Wears cutoffs to church, no she shouldn't oughtta
She yells "Yeehaw!" everytime she sneezes
Got a rebel flag tatt right next to Jesus

That's right, the girl's got class
Can get a coon treed real fast

She's countrier
Than a poison ivy rash
She's countrier
Name on every overpass
You wanna see a yokel, better come meet her
You might know some country but she's countrier

She loves America and Camel cigarettes
All three of the Hanks and cooking up meth

She's countrier
Than ol' David Alan Coe
She's countrier
Than a homemade garden hoe
You gotta hike through kudzu to come see her
You've been to the country but she's countrier

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