Mar 24, 2010

In the Year 2030

This is the debut of a brand new series in the spirit of Conan O'Brian's old "In the Year 2000" bits. FTM looks into the cracked crystal ball and tells you what's going on in the world of music (and other things) 20 years from now.

Without further adieu....

In the Year 2030:

•Governor Tim McGraw signs facial hair tax breaks into Louisiana state law

•Autotuner a mentor on latest season of American Idol

•Rising country singer Hank Williams IV (Real name Carlton Eubanks Williams, product of a Hank III one-night-stand in Tulsa) signs with Curb Records just to spite his estranged father; debut album scheduled for May 2036 release

•Huck Paisley, much to his father's dismay, records his first country album which is entirely devoid of novelty songs

•Ryan Adams and Mandy Moore put out a duets album in the style of George Jones and Tammy Wynette

•Parental Advisory label phased out; Pink "Sissy Songs" warning label phased in for niche market of profanity-free music

•Snoop/Dre record The Chronic: 2030, featuring songs "Nothin' But a AARP Thang," "Gin and Cialis"

•Cowboy Troy opens for Big & Rich for 27th consecutive summer despite not having a charting single since "I Play Chicken With the Train"

•Taylor Swift Behind the Music episode shows the extravagant lifestyle and the over-generosity to her extended family, large dance troupe and entourage that led to her current destitute state

•P Diddy changes his name to an unpronounceable symbol that looks a lot like The Notorious B.I.G.'s face with a dollar sign as the nose

•Justin Bieber still trending on Twitter

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