The Rascal Flatts Project

So, Rascal Flatts is running a contest for fans to design the cover of their next album, entitled Relentless. Well, I'm not actually a fan (though I'll admit to between one and four of their songs being guilty pleasures), but I'm entering anyway. They provided a handy dandy logo and photo kit for prospective contestants, but I had no use for the photos, yet anyway... heh heh heh (evil laugh). Anyway, my actual entry is first (yeah, the tattoo design scheme is kinda tired, but I haven't seen it used on a major label album cover yet), followed by 5 designed exclusively for Farce the Music (warning: not particularly safe for viewing at work or before a meal). Here you go! *For the record, my better half doesn't think it's right to enter the contest and "make fun" of it at the same time... eh, I'm not making fun, just having fun. :)

Daryl Worley parody

I normally don't parody serious songs (well, serious songs I don't hate), but this just fit so well...

I Just Came Back from a Walmart
(parody of Darryl Worley’s “I Just Came Back from a War”)

The first thing I did when that sliding door opened was run like hell
The next thing I did was to go find a mug down at the Wishing Well
Drank some beer and cried a lot into my glass
And when my buddy Billy Joe walked past
He said I don't know what it is, but you seem different to me

I said I just came back from a place where they hated me
and left me alone and ignored
A hell where fat mothers were blocking the groceries that I was there looking for
If I ain’t exactly the same good old boy that walked into that damned ol’ store
I just came back from a Walmart

The very next moment I took a shot of whiskey and stood
I said you’re lucky your wife don’t make you go there, you really got it good
People were cursing and children wore no smiles
There was gnashing of teeth in the baked goods aisle
And I stood in the express lane for an eternity

I just came back from a place where they hated me
and left me alone and ignored
A hell where Nascar displays were blocking the groceries that I was there looking for
If I’m not the well adjusted fella that last came through those swinging doors
I just came back from a Walmart

I hope this never happens to you
Cause a mind is a terrible thing to lose

I just came back from a place where they hated me
and left me alone and ignored
A hell where ratty kids were blocking the groceries that I was there looking for
Chances are I never will be the same
I really don’t know anymore
I just came back from a Walmart

You don’t know me (repeated)

I just came back from a Walmart

Honest DVD Cover

Just so you know...

...I downloaded the kit.

http://www.pcavote.com/pca/influence/Rascal-Flatts/

Go Steelers!