Mar 1, 2011

John Rich's Songwriting Tips #49

Sizzle baby sizzle. If you have problems writing songs with depth, gravity or lasting significance, at least have the good sense to slap in as many puns, hip phrases and well-known axioms as humanly possible. If you can't do any of those things either, find yourself a duo of attractive females who appeal to the prime demographic and have them sing whatever crappy pop-country song you pull from your creativity-barren soul and foist them upon the unwitting public with a flashy video and well planned promotional campaign. Street teams are also helpful. In no time at all, these seeds should reap you a harvest of radio adds. Take it from Rich, even if you've got a Vienna sausage, if you talk it up enough, people will think it's a 2-foot kielbasa. Wisdom from the man who's slung it.

*Not actually written by John Rich.


  1. Seriously, when I want "depth, gravity, or lasting significance," I sure don't turn to country music. Even the "deepest" country songs - recent or classic - are very shallow compared to other art. Country music is best when it isn't trying to pretend to be anything more than it is, which is basically good but mindless entertainment and it is embarrassingly bad when it tries to be "deep" because it usually fails.

  2. Give us some concrete examples then, anonymous #1.

    Anonymous #2

  3. I have to disagree, A1. Depth is not always conveyed in poetic lyrics or obtuse reasoning. A deep subject can be tackled with simple, well-crafted words, and many country songs do just that.

  4. A1 - I disagree with you. Case in point, Kris Kristofferson. Nuff said.



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