May 24, 2019

He's a Small Town Southern Man With Simple Tastes

1 comment:

  1. No, I don't want the Nickelback of country music's bologna on white bread (a reference to one of Jackson's crappy bro-country songs, "I Still Like Bologna", which is the same stereotypical bro-country dreck, but at over 4 minutes long. Imagine that. 4 and a half minutes of bro-country torture that you'll never get back.). What I want is for him to stop degrading country music with his horrible R&B/hip-hop/hair metal music. Instead of fixing sandwiches, I'd rather have Jackson fix the mess that he made country music into. Jackson not only fueled the stereotype that country music is dumb and ignorant (see "It's Alright to Be a Redneck", the aforementioned Bologna song, "Jim and Jack and Hank", and that stupid 9/11-exploiting song where he couldn't tell the difference between Iraq and Iran), but invented bro-country and metro-bro (see "Chattahoochee", "Country Boy", and "Where I Come From"). If it weren't for this soy boy, we wouldn't have crap acts like Luke Bryan, FGL, Sam Hunt, Kane Brown, Hunter Hayes, and Cole Swindell poisoning radio, nor would we have non-country acts like pop star Bebe Rexha ("Meant to Be") and rapper Lil Nas X ("Old Town Road") gaining so much prominence within country music (the former has the longest running number one country song at 50 weeks, while the latter is number one on the Hot 100 and is likely to make a return sometime to the Hot Country Songs chart). People love to point the aforementioned acts as responsible for ruining country music, but there's just looking at the effect and not the cause itself. With that cause, of course, being none other than Alan Jackson aka the Nickelback of country music himself. And speaking of rappers, it's basically a proven fact that Alan Jackson has covered multiple rap songs in concert, specifically
    * Akon - Don't Matter
    * Wiz Khalifa - We Dem Boyz ( video here: )
    * Tyga - Hookah
    * Soulja Boy - Turn My Swag On
    * Soulja Boy - I Got that Sauce
    * Future - Mask Off
    * Flo Rida - Whistle
    * T.I. - Whatever You Like
    * Big Sean ft. Nicki Minaj - Dance (A$$)
    * Lil Wayne - Love Me
    * Drake - Passionfruit
    * Offset - Ric Flair Drip
    * Waka Flocka Flame - Hard in da Paint
    * Shaquille O'Neal - (I Know I Got) Skillz
    * Fetty Wap - Jugg
    Although I admit I've done so before, calling the Nickelback of country music himself a "disgrace" to country music is truly an understatement. His cowboy hat and mullet sure has hell aren't fooling me. "Are the good times really over" for country music? Seeing as snap beats, Drake style R&B, the same old bro-country cliches have become the norm on country radio, obviously yes. And it's all thanks to the Nickelback of country music himself, Alan Jackson. Simply put, Alan Jackson has as much respect for country music as Iran and Venezuela do for America.




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