May 10, 2010

In the Year 2030 #4









•Curb Records puts out Tim McGraw's Greatest Hits 14.5

•Forty-something Britney Spears finally given back control of her finances; promptly blows remaining fortune on pink lemonade vodka sours and quarter slots

•Brett Favre retires from football, plans country album

•Pop newcomer just plays Madonna & Lady Gaga songs while she changes clothes and dances provocatively; wins best new artist at American Music Awards

•Lil Jon elected mayor of Atlanta, okaaay

•Beyonce gives birth to 7lb 3oz baby girl, Jayonce Knowles Carter, who is immediately signed to a recording contract

•Classic country stations spin Gloriana, Shania Twain and Jason Aldean

•Terror alert raised to red during Source Awards

•Death metal given Grammy category; 2030's best album winner, Disemboweled Fungus Rape, eats presenter Lars Ulrich onstage during live broadcast

•Brooks & Dunn reunite for the Walker Scoot Boogie tour

•Jamey Johnson breaks hip after nasty spill over his own beard

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