Showing posts with label Lists. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lists. Show all posts

Sep 19, 2019

Famous Protest Songs Updated For Modern Times



Cracker From Muskogee

The Tide Pod and the Damage Done

Chick-fil-a Took My Baby Away
(Okay, not a protest song, but it had to be here)

Hurt Me SoulCycle

Evviva Il Papa John’s

Talkin’ Colin Kaepernick Blues

I Was a Teenage Incel

Give Hashtags a Chance

Your Punisher Decal Won’t Get You Into Heaven

This Meme is Your Meme

Big Yellow Uber

Doxxing in the Name

Outrage of a Small Circle of Friends

De Keurig Man

Yasss Save the Queen!

White Claws for Peace

Would Jesus Wear a TAG Heuer?

Cancellation Song

Nike Punks F*** Off

Let’s Retweet the President

Hobby Lobby… the Punishment Due


Jun 4, 2019

John Rich Singing “Shut Up About Politics” is Like:


John Rich, who's more famous for being politically provocative over the last few years than writing or performing songs, has a new song out called "Shut Up About Politics." Well, that's pretty much like....

-------

Florida-Georgia Line calling out people who use auto-tune


Shooter Jennings making fun of short people

Kane Brown covering “Murder on Music Row”

Miranda Lambert coming out against violent lyrics

Dustin Lynch calling someone a sellout

Dustin Lynch having a clothing line called “Stay Country”

Chris Brown wearing a “Mean People Suck” t-shirt

Tracy Lawrence talking sh** about Chris Brown

Luke Bryan saying somebody should act their age

David Allan Coe complaining about a sub-par concert

The Bellamy Brothers being against mixing country and rap

A Beyonce fan calling someone obsessed

Jamey Johnson saying Chris Knight waits too long between album releases

Hank 3 telling someone to watch their mouth

Tim McGraw saying someone has a stupid looking hat

Mitchell Tenpenny calling Old Dominion creepy

Old Dominion calling Mitchell Tenpenny creepy

Zac Brown saying any song is embarrassing


Dec 13, 2018

What Your Favorite 2018 Album Says About You 3


Brothers Osborne - Port Saint Joe
You smoke dope and vote Democrat, but don't want your dad to find out.

Morgan Evans - Things That We Drink To
Wait, who??

6ix9ine - Dummy Boy
You were fired from your job at Walgreens for having purple hair (but really it was for stealing pills).

Ghost - Prequelle
Your idea of a good time is reading about serial killers on Wikipedia. You dabbled in satanism in high school, but now are a Lutheran.

MTHRFCKR - Micro Crystals
You are too much of a hipster contrarian to admit this album doesn't actually exist. 

Eric Church - Desperate Man
You love how Eric is such a renegade and so different from all those other bro-dudes on country radio, but your favorite song of his is "These Boots." 

The Carters - Everything is Love
You will send me death threats if I say this album wasn't that good.

Eminem - Kamikaze
You are male, mid-thirties, single, and still argue with your parents over the rent for your room over the garage.

Sun Kil Moon - This is My Dinner
You are a military interrogator and this is your "favorite" only in that it is the most effective torture device to get enemy combatants to reveal information.

Greta Van Fleet - Anthem of the Peaceful Army
You are a forty-something dad who respects Led Zeppelin but doesn't really like them. Your ex-wife is still living pretty comfortably off the divorce settlement, but sells LulaRoe and essential oils on Facebook for extra cash.

Jason Aldean - Rearview Town
You didn't actually listen to the whole album, just the singles. You type things on Facebook like "Sam Hunt sucks… listen too real country like Jason Aldean an Old Dominion!"


Dec 11, 2018

All Farce the Music's "Best Albums" Since 2008


It's Year-End List season, (Our 2018 albums list should be ready later this week or early next week) so it's time for a recap of which albums topped our lists in past years. 

----------

No links, no summaries, no pretty album covers, just lists.
Who knows? 
Maybe you'll see something you've been forgetting to check out.

2017
1. Tyler Childers - Purgatory
2. Turnpike Troubadours - A Long Way From Your Heart
3. Jason Isbell & The 400 Unit - The Nashville Sound
4. Colter Wall - s/t
5. Chris Stapleton - From A Room, Vol. 2
6. Gregg Allman - Southern Blood
7. Jason Eady - s/t
8. John Moreland - Big Bad Luv
9. Shinyribs - I Got Your Medicine
10. Travis Meadows - First Cigarette
11. The Steel Woods - Straw in the Wind
12. J.D. McPherson - Undivided Heart & Soul
13. Chris Stapleton - From A Room, Vol. 1
14. Zephaniah OHora - This Highway
15. Steve Earle - So You Wannabe An Outlaw
16. Lee Ann Womack - The Lonely, The Lonesome and The Gone
17. Lee Bains III & The Glory Fires - Youth Detention
18. Hellbound Glory - Pinball
19. Lillie Mae - Forever and Then Some
20. Margo Price - All American Made

2016
1. Sturgill Simpson - A Sailor's Guide to Earth
2. Cody Jinks - I'm Not the Devil
3. Lori McKenna - The Bird and the Rifle
4. Brent Cobb - Shine On Rainy Day
5. Austin Lucas - Between the Moon and the Midwest
6. Justin Wells - Dawn in the Distance
7. Flatland Cavalry - Humble Folks 
8. Drive-by Truckers - American Band
9. Blackberry Smoke - Like an Arrow
10. Caleb Caudle - Carolina Ghost
11. A Tribe Called Quest - We Got it From Here…
12. (tie) Jeff Shepherd & the Jailhouse Poets - s/t
12. (tie) The Sword - Low Country
14. Luke Bell - s/t
15. Car Seat Headrest - Teens of Denial
16. Brandy Clark - Big Day in a Small Town
17. Elizabeth Cook - Exodus of Venus
18. Rodney Parker & 50 Peso Reward - Bomber Heights
19. Arliss Nancy - Greater Divides
20. Quaker City Night Hawks - El Astronauta

2015
 (2015 was the first year we did a staff-voted list)
1. Turnpike Troubadours - s/t
2. James McMurtry - Complicated Game
3. Jason Isbell - Something More Than Free
4. Chris Stapleton - Traveller
5. Whitey Morgan - Sonic Ranch
6. American Aquarium - Wolves 
7. The Yawpers - American Man
8. Ray Wylie Hubbard - The Ruffian's Misfortune
9. John Moreland - High on Tulsa Heat
10. Jonathan Tyler - Holy Smokes
11. Father John Misty - I Love You, Honeybear (tie)
William Clark Green - Ringling Road (tie)
Jason Boland and the Stragglers - Squelch (tie)

2014
1. Sturgill Simpson - Metamodern Sounds in Country Music
2. The War on Drugs - Lost In the Dream
3. Adam Faucett - Blind Water Finds Blind Water
4. Hiss Golden Messenger - Lateness of Dancers
5. Old 97's - Most Messed Up
6. Lydia Loveless - Somewhere Else
7. Run the Jewels - RTJ2
8. Kelsey Waldon - The Goldmine
9. Pallbearer - Foundations of Burden
10. Lee Ann Womack - The Way I'm Livin'
11. Lee Bains III & The Glory Fires - Dereconstructed
12. Stoney Larue - Aviator
13. Tami Neilson - Dynamite!
14. Cory Branan - The No-Hit Wonder
15. Fire Mountain - All Dies Down
16. St. Paul and the Broken Bones - Half the City
17. Don Williams - Reflections
18. Matt Woods - With Love From Brushy Mountain
 19. Marty Stuart and His Fabulous Superlatives - Saturday Night/Sunday Morning
20. Jimbo Mathus - Dark Night of the Soul

2013
1. John Moreland - In the Throes
2. Jason Isbell - Southeastern
3. Sturgill Simpson - High Top Mountain
4. Arliss Nancy - Wild American Runners
5. Drew Kennedy - Wide Listener
6. Run the Jewels - RTJ
7. Brandy Clark - 12 Stories
8. Austin Lucas - Stay Reckless
9. Fifth on the Floor - Ashes and Angels
10. Ashley Monroe - Like a Rose
11. The National - Trouble Will Find Me
12. Kacey Musgraves - Same Trailer, Different Park
13. Shooter Jennings - The Other Life
14. Queens of the Stone Age - …Like Clockwork
15. Ha Ha Tonka - Lessons
16. Son Volt - Honky Tonk
17. Guy Clark - My Favorite Picture of You
18. Possessed by Paul James - There Will Be Nights When I'm Lonely
19. Vince Gill and Paul Franklin - Bakersfield
20. Todd Farrell Jr. and the Dirty Birds - All Our Heroes Live in Vans

2012
1. Lee Bains III & The Glory Fires - There is a Bomb in Gilead
2. Marty Stuart - Nashville, Vol. 1 Tear The Woodpile Down
3. Chris Knight - Little Victories
4. The Pollies - Where the Lies Begin
5. Turnpike Troubadours - Goodbye Normal Street
6. The Departed - Adventus
7. Dwight Yoakam - 3 Pears
8. Uncle Lucius - And You Are Me
9. Kendrick Lamar - good kid, M.A.A.D. City
10. The Trishas - High, Wide and Handsome
11. John D. Hale Band - More Than I Can Handle
12. Killer Mike - R.A.P. Music
13. Lindi Ortega - Cigarettes & Truckstops
14. Shooter Jennings - Family Man
15. Alabama Shakes - Boys & Girls
16. Arliss Nancy - Simple Machines
17. Darrell Scott - Long Ride Home
18. Jason Eady - AM Country Heaven
19. Matt King - Apples and Orphans
20. Lucero - Women and Work

2011
1. The Damn Quails - Down the Hatch
2. Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit - Here We Rest
3. Hellbound Glory - Damaged Goods
4. Hayes Carll - KMAG YOYO
5. Jimbo Mathus - Confederate Buddha
6. Cary Anne Hearst - Lions and Lambs
7. Butch Walker and the Black Widows - The Spade
8. The Black Keys - El Camino
9. Adele - 21
10. Ponderosa - Moonlight Revival
11. Austin Lucas - A New Home, In the Old World
12. Kasey Anderson and the Honkies - Heart of a Dog
13. Stoney Larue - Velvet
14. Drew Kennedy - Fresh Water in the Salton Sea
15. Ryan Adams - Ashes and Fire
16. Pistol Annies - Hell on Heels
17. Wilco - The Whole Love
18. Black Joe Lewis and the Honeybears - Scandalous
19. Mastodon - The Hunter
20. Will Hoge - Number Seven

2010
1. Jamey Johnson - The Guitar Song
2. Cee-Lo Green - The Lady Killer
3. Two Cow Garage - Sweet Saint Me
4. Austin Collins & The Rainbirds - Wrong Control
5. Big Boi - Sir Luscious Left Foot: The Son of Chico Dusty
6. Joe Pug - Messenger
7. Trampled by Turtles - Palomino
8. Kasey Anderson - Nowhere Nights
9. Rodney Hayden - Tavern of Poets
10. Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings - I Learned the Hard Way
11. Paul Thorn - Pimps and Preachers
12. Truth & Salvage Co. - s/t
13. Dirty Sweet - American Spiritual
14. The Black Crowes - Croweology
15. Band of Horses - Infinite Arms
16. The Dillinger Escape Plan - Option Paralysis
17. Randy Houser - They Call Me Cadillac
18. Hellbound Glory - Old Highs and New Lows
19. The Black Keys - Brothers
20. Drive-by Truckers - The Big To-Do

2009
1. Charlie Robison - Beautiful Day
2. Ben Nichols - Last Pale Light in the West
3. Buddy and Julie Miller - Written in Chalk
4. Magnolia Electric Company - Josephine
5. Lucero - 1372 Overton Park
6. BettySoo - Heat Sin Water Skin
7. Wrinkle Neck Mules - Let the Lead Fly
8. Great Lake Swimmers - Lost Channels
9. Black Joe Lewis & The Honeybears - Tell 'em What Your Name Is
10. Drew Kennedy - An Audio Guide to Cross Country Travel
11. The Black Crowes - Before the Frost...Until the Freeze
12. Justin Townes Earle - Midnight at the Movies
13. Son Volt - American Central Dust
14. The Devil Makes Three - Do Wrong Right
15. Slaid Cleaves - Everything You Love Will Be Taken Away
16. Joshua James - Build Me This
17. Switchfoot - Hello Hurricane
18. Miranda Lambert - Revolution
19. Krizz Kaliko - Genius
20. Mastodon - Crack the Skye

2008 
1. Drive-by Truckers - Brighter Than Creation's Dark
2. Jamey Johnson - That Lonesome Song
3. Kasey Chambers and Shane Nicholson - Rattlin' Bones
4. Kathleen Edwards - Asking For Flowers
5. Hayes Carll - Trouble in Mind
6. Sun Kil Moon - April
7. The Hold Steady - Stay Positive
8. The Felice Brothers - s/t
9. Two Cow Garage - Speaking in Cursive
10. Fleet Foxes - s/t
11. NQ Arbuckle - XOK
12. Blitzen Trapper - Furr
13. Chris Knight - Heart of Stone
14. Metallica - Death Magnetic
15. Reckless Kelly - Bulletproof
16. The Gaslight Anthem - The '59 Sound
17. Justin Townes Earle - The Good Life
18. Bruce Robison - The New World
19. The Steeldrivers - s/t
20. Drag The River - You Can't Live This Way


Dec 7, 2018

What Your Favorite 2018 Album Says About You 2


Post Malone - Beerbongs & Bentleys
You never use the "hard R." Your dad pays for college, but has threatened to cut you off if you come home with a face tattoo.

American Aquarium - Things Change
You haven't written a humorous tweet since November 2016. You drive a Nissan Leaf but keep your hidden away Harley tuned up for when it's okay to have fun again.

Whitey Morgan & the .78s - Hard Times and White Lines
You wear shirts with curse words on them to family reunions. When you type "Luke Bryan, never heard of her" on Facebook, your co-workers in the maintenance department all click "like." 

Brandi Carlile - By the Way, I Forgive You
You picked an apartment to rent based on its walking proximity to a Whole Foods. You have broken up with someone based on their bad recycling habits.

Sleep - The Sciences
You aren't really patient, you just smoke a shit ton of weed. You spend more money on eye drops than you do body wash. 

Ashley Monroe - Sparrow
You are horny like 24/7.

Keith Urban - Graffiti U
You're still living pretty comfortably off the divorce settlement, but you sell LulaRoe and essential oils on Facebook for extra cash.

Ashley McBryde - Girl Going Nowhere
You are a thoughtful and passionate connoisseur of music. You have definitely punched a man in the face before.

Godsmack - When Legends Rise
You didn't know they put out an album in 2018, but it must be the best album of the year because they kick ass man! You have punched a woman before.

Father John Misty - God's Favorite Customer
You have had your feces tested, and no, it does not stink. You won't date a woman who's prettier than you. 


Dec 5, 2018

What Your Favorite 2018 Album Says About You


Colter Wall - Songs of the Plains
You roll your own cigarettes. You only wear raw denim. You think condiments are for the weak.

Kacey Musgraves - Golden Hour
You never knew you liked country music and you're completely amazed a debut album could be this good.

Morgan Wallen - If I Know Me
You are in Morgan's family.

Tyler Childers - Purgatory
You aren't really into calendars.

Kelsea Ballerini - Unapologetically (Deluxe)
This is the only album you've heard this year.

Ruston Kelly - Mockingbird
You are blocked by Ryan Adams on Twitter. People who know you would best describe you as "pretends to be clinically depressed." 

Pistol Annies - Interstate Gospel
If female, you have probably punched a man in the face before. If male, you vote Democrat but own a shitload of guns.

Cody Jinks - Lifers
You have been muted by half your Facebook friends for sharing too many Farce the Music memes. 

Sarah Shook & The Disarmers - Years
You have definitely punched a man in the face before. You once landed a frontside 180 kickflip without spilling your whiskey.

Kane Brown - Evolution
You have a misspelled tattoo about drama somewhere on your body. All your Facebook posts are passive aggressive but end with a Bible verse.  You graduated 5th in your class …of 5 people in your GED class.

----------

This is satire. Don't take it seriously.
Also, if your favorite wasn't here, there may be more editions soon.
Idea stolen from Medium.


Jul 11, 2018

Country Singer Bars & Restaurants

It seems like every country A-lister has a new restaurant & bar open or on its way to Lower Broadway in Nashville. Inspired by a recent tweet from someone I follow, here are some (thus far) non-existent musician-owned bars and restaurants. 

After the Fries Are Gone
(Loretta Lynn)

Sam Hunt's Cake Pops in a Small Town

Chad Brock's Armbar & Grille

Justin Moore's Short Order Cafe

Let's Go Fajitas
(Faith HIll)

Angus Among Us Steakhouse
(Alabama)

The Heart Wants Pie
(Reba)

Chris Janson's Food Truck Yeah!

It Ain't All Flour
(Sturgill Simpson)

Skeevy's Place Sexy Ladies' Bar
(Old Dominion)

Bok Choy Take Me Away
(Dixie Chicks)

Cole Swindell's White Bread, Crackers, and Bud Light

The Plate of These Wings
(Miranda Lambert)

Brantley Gilbert's Suburban Biker Bar

Now That I Fondue
(Terri Clark)

Bucky Covington's Roadkill Truck

A Good Year for the Rosé
(George Jones)

Colt Ford's Gullet Shove Buffet



Nov 22, 2017

Understanding Bro-Country Fan Internet Slang


Here's a very important piece I unearthed from the Farce the Music vault. It was never posted during the heyday of bro-country, so it has lost a little relevance, but there are still bros out there and you should at least attempt to understand their language.

This is a handy guide to deciphering bro-country fans' slang and acronyms on social media and text messages.

SMH = send me hoes

LOL = liking only ladies

Send nudes = send nudes

WTF = where's the Fireball?

Dead = I just murdered a city boy

Low key = feeling mellow from smoking the marijuana

Fam = group of bros

Off the chain = please help me find my wallet

AF = awesome Ford

OMG = oops my genitals

Lit = (the bonfire of crates we stole is now burning)

TGIF = tailgate is fun

TL/DR = the lice didn't reappear

DR/CR = didn't read, can't read

Shook = concerned that one might be outed as a poser

Thicc = This Hoe Is Conspicuously Curvy

DTF = down (in) the field

Basic = a pickup truck that doesn't have chrome accessories, a light bar, a roll bar, a lift kit, step rails, a winch, truck nutz, mudders, stacks, bed lighting, Yeti sticker, sticker making fun of other brand of trucks/engines.

Extra = has more than one STD

GTFO = give this fellow oral

JGMDSIBK = just got my d*ck stuck in brass knuckles


Mar 30, 2017

You Might Be Fake Country if... (Guest Submission)



...your mic stand went platinum but your album didn't...

You think love songs are supposed to be about trucks & tractors

All your songs are about dirt roads but you grew up in the city...
 
You think Porter Wagoner is a Jeep...

Your manager thought it would be cool to put a chick in the band 
but you're not sure which band member it is...

You think Flatt & Scruggs makes lawn mower engines...

You think "Will the Circle Be Unbroken" is a trick question...

You think a country shuffle is a cool new Spotify playlist...

You think the "Wabash Cannonball" is a cinnamon whiskey shot...

You think 3/4 time a law that helped your cousin get out of prison early

You spent more time picking out your wardrobe than writing your last single...

You only became a country singer to help you reach your goal of 
becoming a judge on TV karaoke contest

----------

Thanks to John Deery of the John Deery Band for sending this in!

Dec 1, 2016

Ten Things That Require Zero Talent


All Farce the Music's "Best of" Albums Lists Since 2008

With all the 2016 "Best of" lists coming (and some already posted – our 2016 list will be later in December) it's time for a recap of which albums topped our lists in past years.


No links, no summaries, no pretty album covers, just lists.
Who knows? 
Maybe you'll see something you've been forgetting to check out.


2015
 (2015 was the first year we did a staff-voted list)
1. Turnpike Troubadours - s/t
2. James McMurtry - Complicated Game
3. Jason Isbell - Something More Than Free
4. Chris Stapleton - Traveller
5. Whitey Morgan - Sonic Ranch
6. American Aquarium - Wolves
7. The Yawpers - American Man
8. Ray Wylie Hubbard - The Ruffian's Misfortune
9. John Moreland - High on Tulsa Heat
10. Jonathan Tyler - Holy Smokes
11. Father John Misty - I Love You, Honeybear (tie)
William Clark Green - Ringling Road (tie)
Jason Boland and the Stragglers - Squelch (tie)


2014
1. Sturgill Simpson - Metamodern Sounds in Country Music
2. The War on Drugs - Lost In the Dream
3. Adam Faucett - Blind Water Finds Blind Water
4. Hiss Golden Messenger - Lateness of Dancers
5. Old 97's - Most Messed Up
6. Lydia Loveless - Somewhere Else
7. Run the Jewels - RTJ2
8. Kelsey Waldon - The Goldmine
9. Pallbearer - Foundations of Burden
10. Lee Ann Womack - The Way I'm Livin'
11. Lee Bains III & The Glory Fires - Dereconstructed
12. Stoney Larue - Aviator
13. Tami Neilson - Dynamite!
14. Cory Branan - The No-Hit Wonder
15. Fire Mountain - All Dies Down
16. St. Paul and the Broken Bones - Half the City
17. Don Williams - Reflections
18. Matt Woods - With Love From Brushy Mountain
 19. Marty Stuart and His Fabulous Superlatives - Saturday Night/Sunday Morning
20. Jimbo Mathus - Dark Night of the Soul

2013
1. John Moreland - In the Throes
2. Jason Isbell - Southeastern
3. Sturgill Simpson - High Top Mountain
4. Arliss Nancy - Wild American Runners
5. Drew Kennedy - Wide Listener
6. Run the Jewels - RTJ
7. Brandy Clark - 12 Stories
8. Austin Lucas - Stay Reckless
9. Fifth on the Floor - Ashes and Angels
10. Ashley Monroe - Like a Rose
11. The National - Trouble Will Find Me
12. Kacey Musgraves - Same Trailer, Different Park
13. Shooter Jennings - The Other Life
14. Queens of the Stone Age - …Like Clockwork
15. Ha Ha Tonka - Lessons
16. Son Volt - Honky Tonk
17. Guy Clark - My Favorite Picture of You
18. Possessed by Paul James - There Will Be Nights When I'm Lonely
19. Vince Gill and Paul Franklin - Bakersfield
20. Todd Farrell Jr. and the Dirty Birds - All Our Heroes Live in Vans

2012
1. Lee Bains III & The Glory Fires - There is a Bomb in Gilead
2. Marty Stuart - Nashville, Vol. 1 Tear The Woodpile Down
3. Chris Knight - Little Victories
4. The Pollies - Where the Lies Begin
5. Turnpike Troubadours - Goodbye Normal Street
6. The Departed - Adventus
7. Dwight Yoakam - 3 Pears
8. Uncle Lucius - And You Are Me
9. Kendrick Lamar - good kid, M.A.A.D. City
10. The Trishas - High, Wide and Handsome
11. John D. Hale Band - More Than I Can Handle
12. Killer Mike - R.A.P. Music
13. Lindi Ortega - Cigarettes & Truckstops
14. Shooter Jennings - Family Man
15. Alabama Shakes - Boys & Girls
16. Arliss Nancy - Simple Machines
17. Darrell Scott - Long Ride Home
18. Jason Eady - AM Country Heaven
19. Matt King - Apples and Orphans
20. Lucero - Women and Work

2011
1. The Damn Quails - Down the Hatch
2. Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit - Here We Rest
3. Hellbound Glory - Damaged Goods
4. Hayes Carll - KMAG YOYO
5. Jimbo Mathus - Confederate Buddha
6. Cary Anne Hearst - Lions and Lambs
7. Butch Walker and the Black Widows - The Spade
8. The Black Keys - El Camino
9. Adele - 21
10. Ponderosa - Moonlight Revival
11. Austin Lucas - A New Home, In the Old World
12. Kasey Anderson and the Honkies - Heart of a Dog
13. Stoney Larue - Velvet
14. Drew Kennedy - Fresh Water in the Salton Sea
15. Ryan Adams - Ashes and Fire
16. Pistol Annies - Hell on Heels
17. Wilco - The Whole Love
18. Black Joe Lewis and the Honeybears - Scandalous
19. Mastodon - The Hunter
20. Will Hoge - Number Seven

2010
1. Jamey Johnson - The Guitar Song
2. Cee-Lo Green - The Lady Killer
3. Two Cow Garage - Sweet Saint Me
4. Austin Collins & The Rainbirds - Wrong Control
5. Big Boi - Sir Luscious Left Foot: The Son of Chico Dusty
6. Joe Pug - Messenger
7. Trampled by Turtles - Palomino
8. Kasey Anderson - Nowhere Nights
9. Rodney Hayden - Tavern of Poets
10. Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings - I Learned the Hard Way
11. Paul Thorn - Pimps and Preachers
12. Truth & Salvage Co. - s/t
13. Dirty Sweet - American Spiritual
14. The Black Crowes - Croweology
15. Band of Horses - Infinite Arms
16. The Dillinger Escape Plan - Option Paralysis
17. Randy Houser - They Call Me Cadillac
18. Hellbound Glory - Old Highs and New Lows
19. The Black Keys - Brothers
20. Drive-by Truckers - The Big To-Do

2009
1. Charlie Robison - Beautiful Day
2. Ben Nichols - Last Pale Light in the West
3. Buddy and Julie Miller - Written in Chalk
4. Magnolia Electric Company - Josephine
5. Lucero - 1372 Overton Park
6. BettySoo - Heat Sin Water Skin
7. Wrinkle Neck Mules - Let the Lead Fly
8. Great Lake Swimmers - Lost Channels
9. Black Joe Lewis & The Honeybears - Tell 'em What Your Name Is
10. Drew Kennedy - An Audio Guide to Cross Country Travel
11. The Black Crowes - Before the Frost...Until the Freeze
12. Justin Townes Earle - Midnight at the Movies
13. Son Volt - American Central Dust
14. The Devil Makes Three - Do Wrong Right
15. Slaid Cleaves - Everything You Love Will Be Taken Away
16. Joshua James - Build Me This
17. Switchfoot - Hello Hurricane
18. Miranda Lambert - Revolution
19. Krizz Kaliko - Genius
20. Mastodon - Crack the Skye

2008 
1. Drive-by Truckers - Brighter Than Creation's Dark
2. Jamey Johnson - That Lonesome Song
3. Kasey Chambers and Shane Nicholson - Rattlin' Bones
4. Kathleen Edwards - Asking For Flowers
5. Hayes Carll - Trouble in Mind
6. Sun Kil Moon - April
7. The Hold Steady - Stay Positive
8. The Felice Brothers - s/t
9. Two Cow Garage - Speaking in Cursive
10. Fleet Foxes - s/t
11. NQ Arbuckle - XOK
12. Blitzen Trapper - Furr
13. Chris Knight - Heart of Stone
14. Metallica - Death Magnetic
15. Reckless Kelly - Bulletproof
16. The Gaslight Anthem - The '59 Sound
17. Justin Townes Earle - The Good Life
18. Bruce Robison - The New World
19. The Steeldrivers - s/t
20. Drag The River - You Can't Live This Way

May 6, 2016

9 Signs You're the Bro-Country Fan of Your Friend Group

1. You don't understand any of the jokes your friends tell that don't involve dicks.


2. You tag along at parties where people discuss politics and pop culture, 
but you'd rather be drunk in a trailer park somewhere.


3. You dress and behave inappropriately at baby showers and weddings.


4. Things never end well when your friends let you pick the music in the car.


5. You always ruin the group photos.


6. Nobody ever goes with you to concerts, so you drink a lot at shows.


7. While everybody else is drinking wine and craft beer…


8. Your friends are always making fun of your tattoo.


9. But at least you get to enjoy your music in your own ride.

Apr 3, 2015

Sam Hunt's Top 5 Most Country Moments

Sam Hunt's Top 5 Most Country Moments

5.
 
4.
 
3.
 
2.
 
1.

Apr 3, 2014

Somewhere In Nashville Right Now...

Somewhere In Nashville Right Now...

A songwriter is rewriting a verse so he can fit "my bae" into the song.

Looks are winning out over talent - @Mando_lines


A former folk band hopeful is shaving his beard into a douchebag goatee.

A Luke Bryan fan just hit puberty - ‏‪@redonkulousD‬


Keith Anderson is loading the UPS truck for his morning run.

Marilyn Manson is cutting his first country single, Tailgating in Hell.

Tim Mcgraw and Kenny Chesney are being classified as "Classic Country" - @pug6994

Scott Borchetta is signing the first "bro-grass" band.

Some dearly departed country legend actually digs the new Jerrod Niemann song
and is NOT rolling in his grave.

I'm eating a peanut butter sandwich - @ToddFarrellJr

Someone is writing one of the most beautiful and inspired country songs of all time (that will be never be heard on country radio).


Rhett Akins is writing a country-rap song about John Anderson.

A man is putting zebra striped spandex under ripped jeans looking himself
in the mirror and saying THAT'S COUNTRY right thar. - @xray_don66

A producer is trying to figure out where to put the bass drop in a hot new country band's debut song.

----------------

Thanks to Twitter pals for helping out!

Dec 26, 2012

Top Songs of 2012 - (Very!) Honorable Mentions

These are the songs released in 2012 that fell outside my top 10, but I felt were worthy of mention... 
not only mention, but excited proclamation actually. 2012 was a banner year for music - 
mostly outside of the mainstream, though there were some true mainstream gems. 
Here are FTM's honorable mentions for top songs of 2012, in no particular order.


Kacey Musgraves - Merry Go 'Round (Mainstream Country Song of the Year)
Fistful of Beard - White Bluff
Dwight Yoakam - It's Never Alright
The Departed - Prayer for the Lonely
Shooter Jennings - The Long Road Ahead

The Pollies - Ashes of Burned Out Stars

Horsehead - God Damned the Rain to Fall
Brent Cobb - Diggin' Holes

Ronnie Fauss - This Year

Corb Lund - One Left in the Chamber
Uncle Lucius - Pocket Full of Misery
Kendrick Lamar - B*tch, Don't Kill My Vibe
Ryan Bingham - Western Shore
Kathleen Edwards - A Soft Place to Land
fun. - Some Nights
Zac Brown Band - The Wind
Bonnie Raitt - You Can't Fail Me Now

Alabama Shakes - Heartbreaker

Gretchen Peters - The Matador

ZZ Top - I Gotsta Get Paid

EL-P - The Full Retard
Darrell Scott - Dance in the Darkness
Alan Jackson - So You Don't Have to Love Me Anymore
The Deadfields - Carolina Backroads
Smashing Pumpkins - Pinwheels
Blackberry Smoke - Crimson Moon

Lucero - Like Lightning

Marty Stuart - Sundown in Nashville
Kasey Anderson and the Honkies - Some Depression
Roger Creager - Bad Friend to a Good Man

Soundgarden - Blood on the Valley Floor

Josh Abbott Band - Flatland Farmer
Bruce Springsteen - Land of Hope and Dreams

Japandroids - The House that Heaven Built

Old Crow Medicine Show - Ain't It Enough
Lindi Ortega - Use Me
Frank Ocean - Thinkin' About You

Gary Clark Jr. - You Saved Me

Nov 26, 2012

If Sex-Related Country Songs Had Honest Titles




She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy (Kenny Chesney)
would be
It Doesn't Take Much to Get in her Cut-off Jeans

She Cranks My Tractor (Dustin Lynch)
would be
She Gives This Redneck an Erection

Brown Chicken Brown Cow (Trace Adkins)
would be
Farm Animals Like to Watch Us Do the Nasty

Back That Thing Up (Justin Moore)
would be
Let's Go Doggy-Style...on a Hay Bale

She Thinks His Name Was John (Reba McEntire)
would be
She Used to Spread Like Parkay

Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy (Big and Rich)
would be
Heres a Bumper Sticker Slogan, Let's F**k

Big Green Tractor (Jason Aldean)
would be
My Wang is Not the Right Color


I've Already Loved You In My Mind (Conway Twitty)
would be
I Rubbed One Out in the Bathroom Before I Introduced Myself

Nothing On But the Radio (Gary Allan)
would be
These Weight Loss Commercials are Really Killing My Boner

Bob That Head (Rascal Flatts)
would be
Give Me Oral, This is How You Sonic

Something To Do With My Hands (Thomas Rhett)
would be
Oooooh, Boobies


Morning Desire (Kenny Rogers)
would be
Morning Wood

I Melt (Rascal Flatts)
would be
ugh, never mind….

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails