Archives: Taste of Country Readers Vote Sam Hunt Song Best Thing to Happen Ever

Taste of Country Readers Vote "Body Like a Back Road" Best Thing to Ever Happen Ever 

ORIGINALLY POSTED SEP 29, 2017

In a recent poll, readers of the popular mainstream country website, Taste of Country, voted Sam Hunt's song "Body Like a Back Road" the best thing to ever happen, like ever. This in addition to the song's all-time record for weeks at #1 on the Billboard Hot Country Chart add to the hit song's growing list of very important accolades.

Eschewing momentous occasions generally regarded as eternally significant by large swaths of the population, TOC's readers instead picked Mr. Hunt's bouncy ode to a lover's body as the greatest single thing in the history of mankind. 

Also included in the poll was ratification of the 19th Amendment, giving women the right to vote. A momentous occasion yes, but not nearly as huge as this hunk's silly singalong about a curvy chick. Rather ironic in the context, but none-the-less.

Another loser in TOC's poll was the birth of Jesus Christ. A full 23% more Taste of Country readers believed that a song including the phrase "The way she fit in them blue jeans, she don't need no belt" was of greater import to their lives than God sending his Son to earth to save them from their sins. 

Finishing up second-to-last in the poll was America's independence. While this was certainly a great moment in history, Taste of Country's readers felt that Sam Hunt's vapid pop song masquerading as country was of far greater meaning to their lives than the establishment of the free country that most of them hail from.

Some critics will be swift to dismiss the results of this poll and deride its voters, but sometimes a song comes along and touches its listeners on their hips like honey and won't let go. Who are we to belittle Sam's latest victory and the fans who have bestowed this massive honor upon him?

At press time, Taste of Country had just posted a hard-hitting exposé entitled Country Hunks and What They Feed Their Dogs.

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The Band Perry Reveals Last 6 Years Have Been Elaborate Hoax

“Ha ha! Got ya!” laughed Kimberly Perry, lead vocalist of pop-country trio The Band Perry. “Y’all thought we’d lost our minds, huh?” Perry, clad in blue jeans, a Merle Haggard t-shirt, and a dark plaid tied around her waste, explained the long con in a short interview with us this week. 

“We’re back so y’all can play us again,” she smiled, jokingly elbowing the air as if dropping a big hint to country radio programmers. “This was all a prank Reid thought of.” Kimberly’s brother apparently came up with the idea in 2014, but only planned on the elaborate joke lasting for a year or so. 7 years later, the group is playing clubs and living off Covid stimulus checks. 

The Band Perry, on the strength of smash hits like “If I Die Young,” “Better Dig Two,” and “You Lie,” was quickly racing toward A-list status in the mainstream country realm. Suddenly, as if bored with success and money, things took a weird detour. In 2015, the trio suddenly took a hard turn toward pop music, cycling through various and increasingly strange and less country iterations and fashions over the next half decade, leaving fans and critics alike dumbfounded. 

“That tan era was my idea,” admitted Perry. “Looking back, it looked sorta incestuous; that was honestly pretty creepy …even for a hoax, which it really really seriously was.” “I’m not kidding now. We’re a country band. Can't believe y'all fell for it.” she followed.

Perry told us they truly did not intend to commit so fully to the practical joke. “I don’t even like electronic music, and I could puke looking at the photos from the ‘yellow’ era… we just kept daring each other to keep it going and keep it going… then the money started running out, so here we are.” explained Perry. “But it’s not about the money at all, I mean it; we just screwed up.”

While not currently signed to a major label, the group hopes the big reveal of the definitely authentic hoax will have the big companies back at their doorstep. “We want to open shows for boyfriend country singers, we wanna do radio tours, we wanna put out syrupy catchy murder songs again!” smiled Perry. “Please believe me that this was just a silly ruse.”

At press time, The Band Perry was planning to sell the prank as a non-fungible token, whatever that means.