Aug 9, 2009

Odds & Ends



Joe Diffie Parody

Here's a funny parody from new contributor Bobby Joe!

Note from BJ: Apologies to Kerry Kurt Phillips and Howard Perdew, writers of the fine hit by Joe Diffie, "Pickup Man."
Stickup Man
(©2009 BobbyJoe parody lyric)

Well, I got my first Glock when I was ten
Robbed a lemonade stand with a friend
Hauled booty and ran and thought twice before
I robbed a golden-tooth pimp and his fav'rite whore
She tried to bribe me with a flash and he said, "Dude, understand
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man"

When I turned sixteen, I jacked a car for a thrill
My first ride was a Coup Deville
I was cruisin' the town and the first freak I seen
Was Juicy Jo Johnson, the neighborhood queen
He flagged me down with his polished nail hands, and said
"I never knew you were a stickup man"

(Chorus):
You ought to hear it fire, man, it makes them run
I wouldn't even trade it for an Uzi gun
It's got a ten-round clip that's always easy to change
You know, if it weren't for cops, I'd always get my way
I spend my time out on the lam
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man

Most Friday nights, I can be found
Chasin' freaky young things down at Lee Roy's Lounge
While out on the street, my ol' homeboy Son
Well, he's casing joints for a midnight run
I always got my radio tuned to po-lice band
'Cause there's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man

(Chorus):
You ought to hear it fire, man, it makes them run
I wouldn't even trade it for an Uzi gun
It's got a ten-round clip that's always easy to change
You know, if it weren't for cops, I'd always get my way
I spend my time out on the lam
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man

(Bridge):
A job with low pay or a rapper's bling dreams
One squeeze of my Glock and you'll know what I mean

(Chorus):
You ought to hear it fire, man, it makes them run
I wouldn't even trade it for an Uzi gun
It's got a ten-round clip that's always easy to change
You know, if it weren't for cops, I'd always get my way
I spend my time out on the lam
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man

Yeah, there's something po-lice hate about a stickup man

Aug 6, 2009

John Rich's Songwriting Tips #12

The hook is the thing. It needs to be strong, rememorable and marketable. Especially that last thing. If you ain't got a sharp hook, you ain't got shee-it. My hooks have brought me great wealth and that has led to great refinement and sophistication. #1 songs, hoochie mamas, fur coats, you name it, I've had it, I'll get it or I don't want it. It's also good to have a nice right hook when you're in my position of superiority. Sometimes you gotta keep fools in check.

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