Farce the Music: Joe Diffie

Showing posts with label Joe Diffie. Show all posts

Sep 20, 2024

Welcome to Earth

Aug 29, 2024

Zach Top Covers Diffie's "Pickup Man"

Aug 22, 2024

Famous Movie Scenes Country Reaction Gifs

When a couple of dorks ride by listening to Dan + Shay

Rich O'Toole if there's ever a tortilla shortage

Is is cold in here, or is it just you?

When she's got 5 kids, a 405 credit rating, and drinks too much Steel Reserve, but she loves Turnpike as much as you do

When the popular girls at school in 1985 see you wearing a Kenny Rogers t-shirt

Sir, how did you say the Snake Farm sounds again?

Me fending off grammatically incorrect misspelled angry comments under a Morgan Wallen meme

When the Zach Bryan army finds out you said he's just 'pretty good'

Bobby reviewing just about any inspirational country song

When you fall in the port-a-john at the Billy Strings show

When she says it's over if you don't take her to see Post Malone

Jul 25, 2024

Prop Me Up Beside the TouchTunes

Jun 21, 2024

Rotting Corpse Starting to Affect Honky-Tonk’s Ambiance

West Memphis, AR – A popular local drinking establishment is losing patrons and racking up Department of Health complaints at a rapid pace in recent days and the reason is particularly macabre.

"They've got a dead body leaned up on the jukebox," said Pearl Heath of West Memphis. "I s**t you not; the owner said it was the dude's deathbed request, but they ain't got no air conditioner and it's getting pretty ripe up in there." She went on to say that the bar owner had even given the corpse whiskey, and a mannequin girlfriend.

Britches and Hoes is a popular honky-tonk that's been open since 1993 on the west side of town. Its owner Joseph D. Fee says he's in a tight spot over the whole "dead body in a business that sometimes serves food" situation.

"At first it was just funny; we were gonna give the guy his dying wish," said Fee, eyes teary from the overpowering odor of decay. "We had a huge crowd that first night due to the novelty of the situation; we put sand in his boots and a stiff drink in his hand, and we planned to get him out of there in a day or so before the health department came calling." That was when things got even weirder.

"Ol' boy's widow came in here and intimated to me that if I removed him from the premises, she would sue," he laughed, painfully. "She said he put that request in his will and that her lawyer would be in contact if I moved him before she said so; I think she's just trying to save money on a visitation."

"It really don't even make no sense legally, but I'm erring on the side of anything that keeps me out of a courtroom," relayed Fee, brushing a fly off his nose. "I hope she picks his ass up soon, I'm gonna have to fumigate."

One former Britches and Hoes patron even thinks the corpse is haunted. "I put on some good ole Luke Bryan music and I swear I saw that dead face wince." said Bart Hurlihy of Jackson, TN. Hurlihy says he has not been back due to the stench.

At press time, West Memphis police were too busy dealing with copper harvesting and off-grid pharmacists to investigate the reported stiff leaned up against a Wurlitzer.