Top 10 Things You'll Never Hear a Jason Aldean Fan Say

By Trailer and Jeremy Harris

-------

10. I’ve decided to take the light bars off my truck because 

they're causing other drivers to have difficulty seeing.

09. Take that Trump Bible off your Christmas list son; 

a regular King James will suffice.

08. Sorry I took up too many spaces in the Petco parking lot. I hope I didn’t cause too much inconvenience. I’ll watch myself in the future.

07. Yes officer, I do know why you pulled me over.

06. No it doesn’t itch

05. Of course I like Tyler Childers; I’d never let political or societal differences keep me from enjoying the music I want to listen to.

4. Women should have the right to…

03. You’re my cousin?? We have to stop this immediately.

02. You know, I'm not voting for her, but Kamala

is actually making a few good points.

01. Sorry the child support was late this month; 

I added a couple hundred for your troubles.

God Bless the C.C.P.?

If Tomorrow All the Things Were Gone

Monday Morning Memes: Kristofferson, Walker Hayes, Cody Jinks

Politics Ruins Everything

The Hatin' Goes On

 (Jelly Roll has a song called "The Hate Goes On")

Dumb**ses Who Just Found Out Willie Nelson is Liberal

Every 2-3 months, a new pack of idiots learns Willie, who has always been a Democrat, is a Democrat. Here's the latest. There's some foul language if that sort of thing bothers you.

New Americana Band Trying Too Hard to Appeal to Hick-Libs

In a music industry increasingly entwined with the political landscape, the latest five-member Americana band, The Brambles, is making headlines—not for their tunes, but for their strained attempts to connect with a hip ‘new’ liberal audience. Despite their clear intent to stick to their roots in storytelling and traditional melodies, the band finds itself navigating a minefield of political expectations that they seem ill-equipped to handle.

Formed just two years ago in the Florida panhandle, The Brambles consists of lead vocalist and guitarist Jake E. Thompson, rhythm guitarist Scruffy Hanks, bassist Burton Longfellow, drummer Louis Perkins, and multi-instrumentalist Barry Weed. With influences ranging from Johnny Cash to The Avetts, their sound is rich with heartfelt lyrics and a nostalgic Americana vibe. 

However, as the political discourse continues to intensify across the nation during campaign season, the band's management is pushing them to find a core fanbase. In a recent interview, Thompson candidly admitted, "We’re not really a political band. We just want to make music about whiskey and beards and square body pickup trucks. But we’re never going to be on the radio, so our manager says we need to cultivate an influential/perpetually-online audience of rural liberals who own guns and drink pour-over coffee.”

In what some might call a series of goofy missteps, the band has worn Che Guevara shirts, donned stupid looking hipster hats, and ghermed the hell out of Jason Isbell in attempts to find the good graces of “hick libs.” From awkwardly phrased tweets about social justice (“Stop the violence in the middle west!” - a tweet which was never deleted) to clumsy attempts at engaging with trending political issues (shoehorning “Walz” in to their song about waltzes), their efforts have routinely missed the mark, leaving fans scratching their heads. 

In a recent concert in Austin, Texas, the band attempted to rally the crowd with an AI written speech about climate change before launching into their upbeat single, “Hurricane Party.” The audience's response was mixed, with some cheering enthusiastically while others exchanged puzzled looks. “They’re good musicians, but I left the show very confused.” said fan Ida Contigo, “The drummer was eating Chick-fil-a while wearing a homemade “F*** Donald Trump” shirt before the show.”

Despite the backlash, The Brambles remain optimistic. “Barry’s been wearing that camo Harris/Walz cap and we put an old pomade logo on the drum kit - I think our fans are getting an idea of the demographic we covet,” Longfellow said. “Not that any of us have ever voted before or know what intersectionality is.” Despite wishing to let their music speak for itself, they continue to test styles and messages in order to find a steady flow of income. As the band continues to tour and cultivate their fanbase, it remains to be seen whether they will find a way to authentically connect with their audience or just become a Farce the Music meme. For now, their plight serves as a reminder of the challenges faced by artists trying to navigate the often contentious intersection of music and politics in today's world.

At press time, Barry was attempting to bait Kid Rock into an online argument despite owning 6 of his albums.

Dumb*sses Who Just Found Out Jason Isbell is Liberal

I guess a little context is in order. Jason Isbell performed at the Democratic Convention Monday night and some highly informed individuals just discovered his political leanings on that very night. 

Gotta Pick a Side

A Simple Truth

Fair & Balanced Coverage

Monday Morning Memes: Beyonce, Tyler Childers, Dan + Shay