Showing posts with label Top 10 Lists. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Top 10 Lists. Show all posts
Aug 6, 2026
Aug 5, 2025
Top 14 Things It Looks Like Jason Aldean is About to Do in This Picture
Top 14 Things It Looks Like Jason Aldean is About to Do in This Picture
About to skip yet another vocal training session
Call his wife to see if it's okay for him to hang out with the boys this afternoon
Ask you to sign up for a phone service he’s involved in that probably won’t have good coverage in your area, but hey, he says it’s patriotic so don’t be a traitor
Text his wife back: “Can we not do an Instagram story today? You can be an influencer without my participation”
Google what a clitoris is
Check his upcoming tour schedule to make sure he has *o*e d**l*rs at every stop
Wipe a tear from his eye as his text to the Don only gets the three flashing dots for a second but no reply
Call somebody wearing a Tyler Childers shirt a “libtard”
Ask you to sign up for a phone service he’s involved in of which many customers have complained about its reliability, but hey, he says it’s patriotic so don’t be a traitor
Look up who this Zach Top guy everybody’s talking about is
Download the Ashley Madison app for old time’s sake
Convince himself the rising cost of touring has nothing to do with tariffs
Quit his friend text group because somebody joked about his mural again
Annoy you with a sales pitch from his kiosk while you were just trying to get out of the shitty mall unseen
Nov 20, 2024
Top 10 Things Kid Rock Fans are Thankful For This Year
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10. That the Kid Rock tour is coming to town next year, since they legally can’t leave town
9. Last kid aging out of child support payments this year
8. That they don’t have to keep their fetish of calling people “re***d” and “fa***t” on Twitter a secret anymore
7. Blue Chew
6. That Whiskey Riff will continue to give them hard-hitting news about Bob Ritchie, along with all the latest national park animal attacks, Kelce brothers rage-bait, and generic merch.
5. Their favorite beer Bud Light okay to drink again since Kid Rock does it
4. Found a new untapped source of copper wire nearby
3. That the majority of Americans voted the way that they would have if they were legally allowed to vote
2. Steel Reserve’s new flavor: Cherry Slushie
1. Midget mud wrasslin’ coming to town the night after Thanksgiving
Oct 11, 2024
Top 10 Things You'll Never Hear a Jason Aldean Fan Say
By Trailer and Jeremy Harris
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10. I’ve decided to take the light bars off my truck because
they're causing other drivers to have difficulty seeing.
09. Take that Trump Bible off your Christmas list son;
a regular King James will suffice.
08. Sorry I took up too many spaces in the Petco parking lot. I hope I didn’t cause too much inconvenience. I’ll watch myself in the future.
07. Yes officer, I do know why you pulled me over.
06. No it doesn’t itch
05. Of course I like Tyler Childers; I’d never let political or societal differences keep me from enjoying the music I want to listen to.
4. Women should have the right to…
03. You’re my cousin?? We have to stop this immediately.
02. You know, I'm not voting for her, but Kamala
is actually making a few good points.
01. Sorry the child support was late this month;
I added a couple hundred for your troubles.
Jan 30, 2024
Top 10 Things Taylor Swift Might’ve Been Saying in This Picture
10. It’s all going according to plan, ahahahahahahahaha! (evil villain laugh)
9. Can we leave so we can beat the traffic?
8. “Mean” wasn’t actually about Trigger at Saving Country Music
7. It’s all true. I’m only dating you to raise my visibility or your visibility, not sure which. But anyway, yeah… Carl wearing wraparound shades in his F-150 ranting on TikTok is 100% correct. Sorry.
6. KC BBQ is better than Texas and beans go in chili
5. Reba is doing the national anthem for the Super Bowl and not me?? What exactly am I dating you for?
4. Don’t tell anybody but I think that Ben Shapiro rap song kind of slaps
3. Brittany wants to go out for flaming shots at Poets after this, you in?
2. You really blew that play in the 3rd quarter; you were supposed to pick up the blitz you little bitch.
1. HAIL SATAN
Nov 1, 2023
Top 10 Ways to Know a Country Album Sucks Without Listening to It
9. The producer has as many songwriter credits as the singer
8. It comes in a box set you have to buy from Bass Pro Shop
(Kidding, it may be good but I’ll never know)
7. The deluxe version came out a month after the regular version
6. Dudes who say “facts” and “bruh” a lot enjoy it
4. The promotional content mentioned them “experimenting with electro-pop and EDM”
1. There are enough songwriters listed to field a Division II college football team
May 23, 2023
Top 10 Ways to Be the “Next Big Thing” in Country/Americana
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10. Stop showering
9. Sound like Morgan Wallen
8. Have a throaty growl that sounds like you’re getting over a sinus infection
7. Get nominated for a Best New Artist award 7 years into your career
6. Only drink beer brewed within 20 miles of your home county
5. Mention Ohio in your song but live 1 state south of there
4. Sound like Tyler Childers
3. Get a shout-out from Jay Potta
2. Grow a mustache that suggests you lost a bet
1. Sound like Zach Bryan
Bonus from Country Universe:
Be rumored to be dating Morgan Wallen
Apr 26, 2023
Top 10 Questions People Ask Morgan Wallen Fans
By Jeremy and Trailer
10. Do you know why I pulled you over?
9. Is it necessary to duct tape over the Bud Light logo on the can?
8. Can you explain this 6 year employment gap?
7. Sir, did you pay for that?
6. I know you spent $1,200 on Wallen tickets but could you please pay your rent this week?
5. Could you please leave, ma'am? This is a library… with books. Morgan went to The Library, a bar.
4. Do you understand the rights I have just read to you?
3. How do you feel about Morgan Wallen’s best song being written by a liberal?
2. Do you know about… other music?
1. Could you go pee in this cup?
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