Feb 3, 2023
Jan 24, 2023
Jan 23, 2023
Jan 3, 2023
Dec 12, 2022
Nov 14, 2022
Oct 20, 2022
Oct 6, 2022
Sep 19, 2022
Aug 31, 2022
Haven't done these in a while so here we go, with help from Twitter pals. The ones not attributed are by yours truly, Trailer.
There Stands the Kupp
The Night They Drove McCaffrey Down
Jerry Reed Options @Misery_n_Gin
Cross Canadian Football League @lhcountryboy
Shotgun Willie @ReadWatchDo
Why Ja’Marr in Here Looking Like That
Touchdown Troubadours @theadamdrake
Why Brady Why
Punt Flicker Pass @JWOutlaw13
Wagon Wheel Route (Adam Drake)
Lost Dak Street Band @TreyBlair33
Mike Evans & The Moonpies (Trey)
Turnpike Goin' For Twobadours @brianmather
Sunday Night Blues
Mammas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Deshaun Watson @FriendDevin
All the Gould in California
The Cody Wolves @Robberino
Cast No Picks
Delta Down @JonMDanforth
The Charles Wesley Go Routes @wilkins63
If Dick Butkus is Up, Why Am I Down
Lynyrd Pigskynyrd @DavidJoy_Author
Lost on 30 Akers
Shenandoah Checkdown @JArnoldTAMU85
Are You Sure Lombardi Done It This Way (Adam Drake)
Jason IsBall @RCHoyt34
Tonight the Waddle Let Me Down
Streets of Lambeaufield @thatjohnhammond
Houston Oilers Marchman (LH Country Boy)
Sweet Dreams (of a W) @JenJenMichelle
I Will Make You Hurts
Wichita Offensive Lineman @ShawnC96WL
Drive-By Justin Tuckers (Shawn)
The Rita Ballou 42s @The_Reliant
Deebo & Lefty
Matt Stafford & The 400 Unit @mrbalusek
Townes Van Slant @knotts632
Muscadine First Down Line @Western_Grunge
Chase Daniels, If You Please
Grieving, I’m a Jets Fan
Aug 29, 2022
Aug 27, 2022
Aug 12, 2022
|Mr. Burns' "Best Songs Ever" playlist|
The meme showed up in his timeline due to a former high school friend Jesse forgot to unfollow sharing it. Incensed that he should be reminded of the mere existence of country music, Mr. Burns made sure to make his high falutin opinion known to all. He has far too refined sensibilities for even one person on earth to think he could listen to the addle brained yawping of sister sexing hillbillies.
“That shit blows ass,” said Burns when we sent him a PM asking politely for some explanation. “LOOOL, you need to get a life, f**king redneck.” Since we couldn’t get Burns to engage in a civil conversation about his disdain of country music, we decided to analyze his supposed stellar taste.
His Facebook profile page was partially public and a recent post bragged excitedly of getting tickets for the upcoming Louder Than Life festival in Kentucky. He specifically mentioned his excitement about seeing those paragons of music, Theory of a Deadman, for the 9th time. He was also hyped about Chevelle, Ghostemane, Sevendust, Pop Evil, Papa Roach, Shaman’s Harvest, and whoever Yungblud is.
Clearly a man of unquestionable artistic preferences, Jesse Burns is far too intelligent and cultured for the inbred idiocy of Kris Kristofferson, or the uneducated foolishness of Merle Haggard, or the bland white trash stylings of Tammy Wynette.
We also found Jesse’s public Spotify playlist entitled “Best Songs Ever.” Prominently featured are the aforementioned Theory of a Deadman who are definitely not a subpar Nickelback cover band. It also includes the stylings of Hinder, Saving Abel, and whatever a Crossfade is. Obviously this man is far too sophisticated for the moonshine swilling moronicness of Guy Clark, or the trailer park platitudes of Dolly Parton, or the barely literate ponderings of Tyler Childers.
At press time, Jesse Burns was cursing at his ex-wife on the phone with a Sam Adams in hand, while Buckcherry blared in the background. But at least he doesn’t like country.
Aug 8, 2022
Aug 4, 2022
I reposted the original of these on Facebook the other day and got taken to task for calling "Copperhead Road" and "Ode to Billy Joe" country songs. Fair enough, I spend half my time saying modern songs aren't really country, so I deserve it I guess. Anyway, here's a more accurate meme. These are all unquestionably country songs.