Showing posts with label Cody Jinks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cody Jinks. Show all posts

Jun 3, 2022

Pop-Country Cover Band Wants You To Stop Requesting Tyler Childers Songs

The lead singer of pop-country cover band Dem Broadway Boyz has just about had enough. During his 2 hour stint at a popular Nashville bar/venue, vocalist Brad Shambles has gone from amused to annoyed to enraged at your constant requests for songs not the the Boyz’s repertoire. 

He sees you there at your table with your girlfriend, Mr. Authentic Country, and despite Brad’s creative shortcomings, he knows your story. You got dragged out to drink $18 cocktails and listen to music you consider beneath you by your attractive but basic love interest, but hey, you don’t have to take it out on him. He doesn’t come to your haberdashery or horse barn or whatever and talk shit about your work.


Brad just wants to play Thomas Rhett and Cole Swindell and Russell Tenpenny.. hell, he gets them mixed up too, but anyway, just let him and his band play selections from the 50 popular songs they know in peace and chill out, dude. Zach Bryan? Do you mean Luke? And who the hell is Colter Wall? You’re just making stuff up now.


You in your vintage Waylon Jennings t-shirt sitting there all high and mighty, drinking a Pabst. What did you expect? That they were going to crank out some Highway Troubadours, or Colby Jinks, or whatever depressing stuff you listen to? Get real man, Dem Broadway Boyz are here to sell beer, Fireball, and overpriced chicken tenders. For the love of God, no they won’t play “Feathered Indians.” 


Brad leans over to his bassist during a rendition of Sam Hunt’s “Body Like a Back Road” and whispers “watch this guy, be ready to take him down” as you saunter to the side stage with a smirk on your face. 


At press time, Brad was singing lyrics read off his phone as the band worked through a poor version of “Whiskey River” after you tipped them $30 to play it. But he’s still pissed.


Apr 13, 2022

More Overly Politically Correct Country Songs



 Folsom Carceral Unit Depressive Disorder - Johnny Cash


Deity Take the Wheel - Carrie Underwood


Migrant Agricultural Worker from Muskogee - Merle Haggard


Feathered Indigenous Americans - Tyler Childers


Intellectually Disabled CIS Young Woman - Keith Urban


Rhinestone Ranchhand - Glen Campbell


Kaw - Liga - Hank Williams


Louisiana Cisgender Woman, Mississippi Cisgender Man - Conway Twitty & Loretta Lynn


You’re the Reason Our Offspring are Aesthetically Challenged - Conway & Loretta


War Dissenters and Cowpersons - Cody Jinks


Penis in Former Confederate States - Hank III


If You See Them, If You See Them - Reba


Xe Don’t Know Xe’s Attractive - Sammy Kershaw


Feb 10, 2022

Wrasslin' Country Reaction Gifs #57

Me trying not to be condescending to a Walker Hayes fan

What is "Pancho and Lefty" about?

What do you think of Warren Zeiders?

You said you'd go to the next local country concert with me, right? Kane Brown is coming, you're in right?

When yet another round of Turnpike tickets are going on sale but...

When you're getting the damn folk band back together!

When you take off Friday 'sick' but remember Cody Jinks is playing in town that night

14 beers in at the Firewater festival, telling your friends you love them

I'm not the hero, who will always save the day
Don't always wear the white hat, don't always know the way


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