5 New Hip-Hop/R&B Parody Covers

Larry Lee the Primitive Baptist Reviews: Brantley Gilbert

Brantley Gilbert - Hell on an Angel

I was appalled by the title of this song from the start. Why do so many country singers feel the need to promote that dark realm in their songs? Also, I'm no scholar but the frequent usage of "hell" in country songs as a noun, verb, adjective, adverb, interjection, dangling participle and whatever else can't be correct. Can I get a Amen!?

I have another question. Why is this song labeled as "country?" It is clearly a southern rock song like that infernal Lynyrd Skynryd and dirty rednecks like that. Brantley Gilbert looks way more like a biker man than a good old Christian country boy. You don't see me going around calling myself Larry Lee the United Methodist, do you? That would be ridiculous ...because I'm not a drunk.

Anyway, the song… It actually had potential and I thought it was a song of spiritual redemption until he called God "baby." I was all like WTF (Why the falsehood)? And then I was like "oh no he didn't." I'm sorry for all the slang, I've been filling in some at the South Holcomb Missionary Baptist Church while the Right Reverend Percival G. Sparks recovers from shingles and I picked up a little of that yang, homeys.

This song worships the false idols of love and females. This man was a sinner and claims to have been redeemed by the fairer se… uh, a woman. Not only is this false teaching, it goes against human nature as well. Women have more evil in one brain cell than a man has in his entire body (not counting the no-no place below his abdomen). Also, Eve was the first sinner. That's good enough for me to know that no salvation ever came at the hands of a female and that a man should always lead the way. Don't tell my wife I said that though.

I believe this Brantley Gilbert only changed his ways for the promise of sexual favors, not true love. There is only one true love and that is with da big poppa in da sky. Believe dat, gee!

You might have guessed that this song has earned the following grade:

F

Fantasy Football Teams of the Country Stars III

Fantasy football seems to get more and more popular every year and most FF leagues are drafting over the next few days (if they haven't already). It's become such a favorite pastime that even some country stars have gotten into the act ...and FTM has gotten hold of some more of the team names and logos from several of Nashville's biggest acts.

Eric Church

Kellie Pickler

Brantley Gilbert

Dave Haywood (of Lady Antebellum)

Wynonna

Darryl Worley

Toby Keith

Awkward Gary Levox Photo of the Week

Satirical Lyrical: It's Sad When People Die

It's Sad When People Die

©2011 Farce Satires

Mama said "Your aunt wants to see you"

"She's only got a little while"

So I shuffled up to her bedside

Doing my best to smile

My aunt said "Boy, you're growing tall"

"Son here's some advice of mine

The secret to a happy life…."

And that's when she flatlined

It's sad when people die

Listen to this song and cry

Remember those who aren't alive

Rolled out of here like tears from your eyes

It's so sad

So sad when people die

Granddaddy was older than Cain

I was helping him in the yard

We had a few laughs raking the leaves

And washing his old car

When we were done we shared some Cokes

And he poured in a little Beam

He said "Someday, son, I won't be here"

Then he slumped over on the swing

It's sad when people die

Listen to this song and cry

Remember those who aren't alive

Saying goodbye with one last sigh

It's so sad

So sad when people die

Bridge

I came home from college 'cause dad was sick

And you just can't get time back

Pulled in the drive in Granddad's old car

And ran over my dog Jack

It's sad when doggies die

Listen to this song and cry

Remember those up in the sky

Gone from this place like your face's smile

It's so sad

So sad when people and doggies die