Showing posts with label folk. Show all posts
Showing posts with label folk. Show all posts

Nov 11, 2022

AmeriQana Album Selling Poorly

A recent album from roots rock band Gadsden Four has barely moved 100 copies since its release in March despite a strong marketing campaign from its indie label. We Go All, a 10-track treatise on all manner of cockamamie conspiracy theories, has gone mostly unnoticed despite speaking to a passionate segment of society.

“I tell you what,” said a frowning Freddie Huddleston, lead singer of Gadsden Four. “It’s clear to me that our ads for the album have been shadow-banned, deprioritized, extreme hidden, regular hidden, comment ghosted, stealth-erased, and super-secret-inverse-quiet-muted on social media and I’m sick of it! Ours is a message every non-adrenochrome ingesting American needs to hear!”


We Go All, released March 11th, is a surprisingly listenable mix of folk-rock and country tunes until you pay attention to the lyrics. Songs about infant harvesting, JFK Jr’s faked death, woke commie satan worshippers, mind-controlling energy drinks, and President Biden’s secret slave trading ring speak to the bat-shit-crazy fringe who find Hank Williams Jr. too liberal.


While no evidence of shadow banning the promotion of the album or band exists, Gadsden Four have found no foothold in the Americana genre whatsoever, failing to land even one booking to play at a reputable venue. “We played a Klan barbecue down near Mobile and a Citizen’s Council cakewalk in Mississippi, but we can’t get any bars to let us play,” said bassist Lynn “Hurricane” Hodges. “They say we’re too ‘controversial’ and ‘not for public consumption’ and ‘in need of a stay at the state mental hospital’ but we don’t let the haters slow us down.”


Huddleston says he hopes Elon Musk’s recent purchase of Twitter brings brighter days for the band and their “political movement.” “I need America to know about reggaeton-and-rape-addicted immigrants swarming our borders and the lizard people bringing about the enslavement of the world population and the purple goblins who live in my shed and tell me all their prophecies when I huff degreaser,” yelled the worked up vocalist. 


At press time, the band was performing as a two-piece at a Proud Boys wine mixer due to the bassist and drummer being in jail on stalking and arson charges.


We Go All track listing:

1. Red Pills and Whiskey

2. Save the Kids

3. The Second Storm

4. Dallas in the Meantime

5. It’s Not Crazy If You Believe It

6. Wake Up!

7. Blue Haired Girl

8. Kanye Was Right

9. 1-06-21

10. They Stole Are Land [sic]


#fakenews #satire


I intentionally did no research into Q-Anon’s beliefs beyond what I already knew from news reports and instead just made up a bunch of stuff so anybody who believes any of that crap would get triggered.

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