I Don't Like New Things
©2011 FTM Satire
I hate new fangled technology
Twitter is what blackbirds do in a tree
And Facebook is my church's directory
Don't need YouTube, I've got the cable TV
Chorus
The Google is what babies say
I don't buy on-line, I use layaway
VHS is best so screw Blu-Ray
Keep your videos of cats who sing
I don't like new things
Call me old fashioned if you will
My favorite handheld's from a whiskey still
And Blackberries grow on a sticker bush
And I buy Hustler to see naked tush
Oh, the Google is what babies say
And Tom-Tom don't tell me the way
I hand 'em cash if my pals need pay
It better be pong if you wanna ping
I don't like new things
Bridge
My phone's still got a curly cord
The post office is my message board
My silent dishwasher's also my wife
Don't need no Wi-fi in my life
Oh, the Google is what babies say
Got a Co-op, I don't need eBay
And iPad that sounds pretty strange
I don't buy shit from Beijing
I don't like new things
