Saturday Night Music / Mike Harmeier (Mike & the Moonpies) / "Public Domain" / MusicFest 2020

Archives: Top 10 Lyrics That Wouldn't Have Made "Accidental Racist" Any Worse

ORIGINALLY POSTED APR 10, 2013

(Brad Paisley/LL Cool J "Accidental Racist")

10. If you don't judge my candy paint whip

I'll forget the pain and punishment

9. To the bum that squeegeed my windshield at the stoplight down on Main,

I think you missed a spot

8. I try to put myself in your shoes but I look dumb in Air Jordans

7. Dear Mr. Honky, You ain't bout that life

6. Our generation doesn't deserve any blamin'

But we're still paying for old faux pas

5. When I put on that t-shirt, the only thing I meant to say is I'm a Brantley fan

4. If you don't judge my baby mamas

I'll say George Bush was better than Obama

3. Caught between achy breaky and Harlem shake

2. And it ain't like you and me are up to speed on history

1. If you don't judge my twenty-twos

I won't bust a cap in you

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Americana Singer Dismayed to Find Out He Has a Conservative Fan

Smith Winston lead singer Chance Lipton

Americana singer Chance Lipton, lead vocalist for Smith Winston, is a proud member of the resistance. In fact, his Twitter bio openly states it, reading: “Rise and fight! If you’re a conservative, I don’t value your opinion. Lead singer of Smith Winston. He/Him.”

The reedy 26-year-old tenor has his band on the upswing, with their second album, Drumbeat of Solidarity, due in April, but a recent revelation has him rethinking his career path. “I thought I’d blocked all the mentally deficient baby cagers, but I recently received a Twitter DM that troubled me to the core.” related Lipton. “I’m literally shaking right now.”

Lipton provided us with a screenshot of the upsetting direct message, which reads as follows:

Hey Chance! I’m a big fan of Smith Winston. I’ve kept up with you guys since that EP in 2014. Saw you twice in concert. Anyway, just wanted you to know that you do have some conservative fans out here, despite your bio. I mean, I’m not crazy about Trump, but I’m certainly to the right of you and that’s cool with me. Your music is great and I can separate my beliefs from my enjoyment of art and have an open mind to your message. Take care and keep up the good work!

“My foundations were shaken by this message,” said Lipton. “How could someone who doesn’t have the same level of compassion for the world like my music? I blocked him of course.” 

Chance continued his stream of consciousness self-debate: “Have I written too many basic love songs that even one without the capacity for love could sympathize with? Am I using too little word salad? Do I need to convey more revulsion for the intolerant? Maybe I should just quit if someone with such low intellect and poor opinions has the opinion that my music is something he identifies with.”

Lipton has asked for a short leave of absence from Smith Winston while he works through his issues.