FTM ponders what these classic rock, R&B and country songs would have sounded like if Dallas Davidson or any of his compadres had written them...
Heartbreaker (Led Zeppelin)
Shake so good got me in a bind, tripping on wallet chains
You're fillin' that bikini top, glistening by the fire
Sugar shaker, your tan lines glow, come take your Levi's off
Love that moneymaker
American Pie
So hey girl, Miss American Pie
Drove my Raptor to the pasture, drinkin' cherry moonshine
And us good old boys were crankin' Jay-Z on up
Singing this'll be the night I get some, this'll be the night I get some
He Stopped Loving Her Today
She stopped shakin' it today
He took her pic off his dashboard
And soon he'll wreck his Chevrolet
She stopped shakin' it today
When Doves Cry
Touch if you will my tattoo
Sweet-ass new tribal design
You've got the watermelon lipstick
Don't make me beg you
Country boys got pride
Hey Jude
Hey Chad, don't spill my beer
Crank a Hank song just like a baller
Remember to find a chick at the bar
Then you can start to give a holler
Thunder Road
And the truck door slams, Mary's sundress sways
Like a vision, she scoots across that bench seat
As the radio plays, Toby Keith singing "Who's Your Daddy"
Hey let me rub on your big fatty
Your so bad behind your computer screen but I bet you wouldn't tell Dallas his songs suck to his face. He'd beat your suburb-boy ass.
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