Pop-Country Leads to Arson

Top 10 Reasons To Avoid A Pop-Country Concert

10. The performers will be singing pop-country.

9. It's the first place your parole officer will look for you.

8. They have both kinds of beer: Bud Light with or without lime.

7. If a girl has all of her teeth, she's underage.

6. The glare from Luke Bryan's teeth has been know to cause permanent retina damage.

5. You may be forced to park under a lifted truck if the parking garage is packed.

4. Colt Ford will be granted entry before you. 

Concession stands will resemble Old Mother Hubbard's cupboard.

3. Are you male? Do you have a tattoo of a deer visible when you wear a sleeveless shirt?

Are your jeans overly tight? Is getting your GED a life goal?

If you answered yes to at least 3 of these, you just became the opening act.

2. Unless you're in the front row, you can't see Justin Moore on stage.

1. Old shiny skinned white guys acting like they're teenagers.

-by Jeremy Harris

I am a Pop-Country Song

I am a Pop-Country Song

©2013 FTM Satires

I have three dads and one mother

Who over some cold beer discovered

They all loved money very much

Hearts raced and their cheeks flushed

As they copulated with each other

(and here I am)

I am a pop-country song

When life's got you down

You can just turn me on

Cause, I know no sadness

And there's nothing wrong

With upbeat, uptempo

And a beat that's strong

2 inches deep and 3 minutes long

I am a pop-country song

I'm trucks and I'm sunny beaches

Underage sex and wise old preachers

Barely there twang and pumped up drums

A tasty pill to keep you numb

Sung by tough guys and Georgia peaches

(Crank it up)

I am a pop-country song

When life gets too real

You can just turn me on

Cause, I'm just a party

For your pasture or lawn

I'm upbeat, uptempo

With a beat that's strong

2 inches deep and 3 minutes long

I am a pop-country song

Bridge

In 6 months I'll be forgotten

But what'd you expect? I'm not art

Maybe I'll have resurrection

With a remix for the pop charts

I am a pop-country song

When life's got you down

You can just turn me on

Cause, I know no sadness

And there's nothing wrong

With upbeat, uptempo

And a beat that's strong

2 inches deep and 3 minutes long

I am a pop-country song

Monday Morning Memes: Wynonna, FGL, Joe Diffie, etc.

Ouch Meme