Showing posts with label Florida Georgia Line. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Florida Georgia Line. Show all posts

Sep 22, 2023

This Guy Rants About Country Music “Authenticity”

We’ve all seen the stories. We’ve all herd the new boring songs. Mainstream country music is evolving in front of are very eyes and I for one do not like it!

Remember the good old days when you could drive you’re girl out to the bonfire in your pick up truck and turn on the country station and not worry that there might be a serious or sad song on their? I miss those days! 


Nowadays when I drive my sidechick in my Raptor and turn on the radio, it’s Luke Combs crying about going somewhere in a fast car, or Ashly McBridde singing about her family or some shit. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Am I right?? 


And the Spotify country playlists ar just as bad. Who tf is Zach Bryan? Is that Luke’s more boring younger brother? I listened to him for 1 whole minute and he did not mention Fireball, pretty tan feet, or the summer moon even once. That ain’t country! And his songs don’t even make any cents. Keep it simple and keep the party going, Zach. Come on man!


I seen that ol’ Zach had the number one album and song in America, and I shed a tear. It feels like things are changing and I’m kinda scared because where else is there to listen to music I like but the radio? Singers are putting their flat brim caps and skinny jeans away, and getting out cowboy hats and work boots. It’s not okay. 


John Party or Chris Stapleton were the ones who started this mess. With a name like Party, John should’ve been dropping the beat and lighting crates on fire for the hotties in every song, but nooooo he’s got to have old whiney instruments. And Chris Stapleton only wrote one good song in his life and that was Thomas Rhett’s “Crash and Burn!”


I look at the tragic break up of Florida-Georgia Line and just think, who’s gonna fill there square toe boots? I see Luke Bryan losing popularity and wonder who’ll tell the country girls to shake it anymore? I here people talk about Cody Johnson and Tyler Childers and weep for the future and all the trucks that won’t have nutz and the coal that won’t be rolled. 


It’s a sad day in America when even Jason Aldean is singing about serious crap. I was going to put a hole in the drywall I’m so mad, but I’ve matured. So I’m just gonna go put on my Chase Rice album, vape some clouds, and pour out some White Claw for the better times. 




Aug 17, 2023

The Shawshank Redemption Country Reaction Gifs

Me: posts meme about rich famous country singer who's sold 25 million albums and won 28 awards

Facebook:

Probably some kinda metaphor for country radio, I dunno

When an Aldean fan calls me a liberal for a meme that has no political meaning whatsoever

When you escape the prison of corporate music

When everybody at your table is complaining about the cancelled Luke Bryan concert


Just a Raquel poster and a hole in the wall

Musician signing up for Spotify like...

If they'd only had some Florida-Georgia Line to crank up

When that "Wabash Cannonball" hits

Another week, another political controversy about a country song

Make your own joke; I can't think of anything PC

Did you hear Morgan Wallen broke yet another record?

 I could've sworn I'd done Shawshank before, but I sure can't find any proof of it.

May 25, 2023

Trading War Stories






Wrasslin' Country Reaction Gifs #71

When you're out of money and somebody launches a Wallen marathon on the jukebox

When someone is wearing a Waylon t-shirt and can't name three of his songs

Please review the new Paul Cauthen song

Waiting on the country concert to start and they play Spice Girls pre-show music

When your drunk buddy gets into a Son Volt vs Wilco argument at the festival

When Shooter Jennings talked to you on Twitter one time and you see him win a Grammy

Ready for that new Turnpike album?

One second into Parmalee's new song 

When your brother says "don't hit me but I kinda like Florida-Georgia Line"

Mar 23, 2023

Blaxploitation Film Country Reaction Gifs

If you step on Hank Jr.'s cowboy boots

When he walks in wearing Luke Combs Crocs

If you ever see me listening to Thomas Rhett on Spotify, ask this:

🎵 There's only you and me and we just disagree 🎵

When he won't turn off the Florida-Georgia Line

When you finally hear a Dan + Shay song

What I shoulda said to Blake Shelton on Twitter

When a dude standing on the side of a bridge insults Dolly Parton

When she's up early, playing some Morgan Wallen

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