Never Forget!

Every #1 Country Song of the 2000s: 2005

2005

January 22: "Awful, Beautiful Life" by Darryl Worley

This is an otherwise great slice-of-life song kneecapped by a pandering and unnecessary bridge. It's just an everyday story about a wayward man dragged to church by his wife, and then to a family gathering after that. I like the humor of the lines "My wife wanted to kill me but she tried to save me first / You're goin' if I have to drag your butt to church." Honestly, the entire song goes along pretty well, riding this Keith Urban-esque guitar groove and building up to a more than decent chorus of "I love this crazy, tragic, sometimes almost magic, awful, beautiful life." And I'd have absolutely no complaints until we get to the line "We said a prayer for cousin Michael in Iraq." The specific mention of Iraq irrevocably ties this song to a specific period in time, which itself is not a reason to denigrate the lyric. But in the context of Darryl Worley's already-present jingoism (see "Have You Forgotten?"), it just feels like unnecessary pandering. To be fair, it's not even remotely the worst attempt at doing so, but I think it does throw a wrench into the song; to be even fairer, I don't know if I'd have the same complaint if someone else sang it. Who knows? Maybe I'm just overthinking again. B

February 5: "Mud on the Tires" by Brad Paisley

Literally the only issue I have with this song is wondering why it was released in the winter. Had this and the stunning "Whiskey Lullaby" been swapped, would I be writing about the latter and lamenting that this was the song that got stuck at #3? Whatever the case, this is Brad doing his lightheartedness right. While taking a girl for a ride in your truck would become a played-out trope in the bro-country era, Brad's take is friendly and conversational. ("Have you been outside? It sure is a nice night / How 'bout a little test drive down by the lake?") I also love how laid-back and acoustic the production is, helped by a very fluid melody that makes some ear-pleasing leaps on the chorus. If Brad offered me a ride in his truck, I wouldn't turn it down, either. A

February 12: "Bless the Broken Road" by Rascal Flatts

"I made a lot of mistakes before finding The One" is a narrative that's not new to country. Just look at "Hurt Me Bad (In a Real Good Way)" by Patty Loveless as another example. This song had a long road to success, having been recorded by the Nitty Gritty Dirt Band, Marcus Hummon, and Melodie Crittenden (who would later re-do it with Christian act Selah) before Rascal Flatts got to it. Surprisingly, there isn't a substantial difference among all the prior verisons -- they're all chill yet polished piano ballads, although I have to admit the NGDB version is a little too Michael Bolton for my tastes. Gary LeVox is pleasantly relaxed in his delivery, keeping this perfectly fine narrative from being melodramatic or trite. I still think the title is a bit unwieldy, and the piano intro a bit derivative of "Walking in Memphis," but as a whole, I also think this is the best version of the song out there. B+

March 19: "Nothin' to Lose" by Josh Gracin

Prepare ship for ludicrous speed. This is what the old folks might call a "patter song," with its main purpose being "go as fast as humanly possible." And if you pay attention to the lyrics, you realize just how utterly goofy and ridiculous it is -- and how all the better it is for doing so. "Rollin'  in dirt in a white T-shirt" is the kind of corny energy I think wouldn't have had a chance hitting at radio except in the months following the gonzo "Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy)." Sometimes I have no better defense of a song than "it's fun," but there's always room for fun in my book. Plus, it's just impressive on a technical level that he nailed this song on the first take, adding a little bit of rawness that makes it stick around far beyond the first listen. A

March 26: "That's What I Love About Sunday" by Craig Morgan

I'm no longer salty about this one blocking Sugarland's "Baby Girl" from #1 or taking forever to fall off the charts. Back when this song came out, Sunday to me meant going to church, hanging around for coffee, and then listening to Bob Kingsley while I stuffed the newspapers I would then deliver. It sounds so mundane, but with it came a sense of comfort. Most of the people at church were nice (although a lot of them had to grow to like me), and the paper route usually meant I had an hour or two to myself. What I also love about this song (see what I did there?) is how chill it is, and how it evokes Sunday without being sanctimonious. It's just about finding comfort in the everyday, and what's wrong with that? B+

April 23: "Anything but Mine" by Kenny Chesney

The summer love nostalgia song is a standard in country music, but usually it's a look backward. Where this song stands out is by framing everything in medias res. We're in the moment, knowing the breakup of summertime love is impending, but still doing our best to enjoy the time we've still got together for walks along the boardwalk, carnival rides, and beachside concerts. And I think it's that framing that makes this song stand out even in Kenny's already beach bum-skewing catalog; it's just that different and vivid. I can picture every moment they're enjoying before he goes back to Cleveland, and I can feel the emotion of a line like "In the midst of the music, I tell her I love her / And we both laugh 'cause we know it isn't true." His delivery is laid back enough to enhance the slow burn, and the production is that right mix of joyous yet somber in how it leans into the electric guitar. I've had many people who aren't Kenny Chesney fans tell me this is one of the songs of his they do like -- and as someone who is a fan of his, I feel I'm well within my right to endorse it even harder. Easily one of his best. A+

May 7: "It's Getting Better All the Time" by Brooks & Dunn

This is one of their best, but sadly, also one of their most overlooked. Against a haunting string and piano production, Ronnie Dunn lays out a guy who's struggling to get over her. "I don't stop breathing every time the phone rings / My heart don't race when someone's at my door" sets the tone immediately, and it's enhanced by revelations that he's stopped drinking and started relying on his faith to get him through. That last verse is the real gut-punch, though: he finally runs into her again, and holds back from speaking his mind. While it is "getting better all the time," it's clearly not perfect yet -- she's still on his mind. And it's that unresolved tension that, when combined with Ronnie's up-front vocal and the beautiful production, makes for one of the absolutely best in some late-career highlights for them. A+

May 14: "My Give a Damn's Busted" by Jo Dee Messina

Joe Diffie had a  knack for the goofy that is hard to replicate (although songs like "Ships That Don't Come In" showed he could knock a ballad out of the park, too). And Jo Dee taking an obviously jokey song and giving it a dead-serious, determined delivery is a massive tonal misfire. The lyrics are just too comical to benefit from a serious read, what with lines like "twisted my heart 'til something snapped inside" and (admittedly now a little dated) name-drops of Prozac and enablers (oddly, she did snip out the Oprah name drop, which I probably would have let slide had she left it in). It all just fits so much better with the offhanded way Joe Diffie sang it, complete with his sharp little "eh-eh" after the second chorus. While I've already confessed to not being much of a fan of hers, I will say this isn't awful, and it's pretty well produced. But man, did it ever miss the point of the original. And it's not even the worst cover song on this album; she did an even more reprehensible job with Beth Hart's equally quirky "Delicious Surprise." C-

May 28: "Making Memories of Us" by Keith Urban

I actually heard this one for the first time as sung by Rodney Crowell on the Notorious Cherry Bombs album. It has Rodney's fingerprints all over it, what with its mix of depth ("Speak the language in a voice that you have never heard"), uncommon imagery ("in a cabin by a meadow where the wild bees swarm"), comfort ("you've been stretched to the limits, but it's all right now"), and humor ("I wanna steal your attention like a bad outlaw"). The underlying theme of trust is palpable in every line, and I think it's that emphasis on that theme that makes this a bit meatier than most romance songs. Keith gives a warm, tender read with a warm, tender production style that's in a similar vein to "You'll Think of Me" without feeling derivative. Plus, he got a freaking Rodney Crowell song to #1. How cool is that? A

July 2: "Fast Cars and Freedom" by Rascal Flatts

This was one of the last times Rascal Flatts truly felt breezy and easygoing, and it's almost like the end of an era on that front. That guitar riff is catchy, and I can't ever knock a "beautiful just the way you are" narrative. I also like how the narrative leans into the car imagery, referencing Chevrolet Nova and gravel roads -- images that weren't nearly as cliché then as they would be in the bro-country era. There's also an intentional break in flow in the chorus with the line "baby, don't move, right there it is," and again when all the instruments drop out of the hook. Subversive compositional tricks like that do a lot to elevate a song this lighthearted and catchy. It's not trying to be the deepest thing ever; it's just looking for a light-hearted sing-along with a couple of minor twists. And what's wrong with that? B+

July 23: "As Good as I Once Was" by Toby Keith

Not unlike Kevin John Coyne, whose work inspired this list, this song had to grow on me. I think I was just choking on the title. I've often dragged songs that lean too hard into the braggadocio (it's why "I Got My Game On" is my least-favorite Trace Adkins song), but this one is an extremely clever subversion. This guy is in tough situations where he's used to just pulling out his man card, but he's getting older. But when presented with attractive women and a bar fight, he initially turns it all down -- only to turn back around with an admission that yeah, I guess I can do it just this once. It's an unusual amount of brains added to the brawn, and it's all delivered with a knowing wink. This kind of self-deprecation is so unusual in the genre, and while it took quite a while for me to warm up to it, that slow burn just makes it all the stronger for me. A

September 3: "Mississippi Girl" by Faith Hill

An attempt to regain all the cred she'd destroyed by that poppy Cry album, this countrified take on "Jenny from the Block" still somehow manages to be at least a little less cringe than the context would have you believe. I like that it name-drops her actual hometown, and the chorus is catchy (although I don't think I've ever seen Faith Hill in a baseball cap). The production is pretty much on point, too, what with the unusual chord structures and mandolin. Admittedly, 2005-me knew almost nothing about the context and thought the song was okay on its own merits. Context may drag it down some, but not to the point I'd call it awful. Transparent and forced? Maybe a little. But still, I can't hate it no matter how hard I try, so there's probably some intangible making it not ring as false for me as it might for someone else. Or maybe it's just nostalgia for a time when I didn't know how deep the rabbit hole actually went. B-

September 17: "Play Something Country" by Brooks & Dunn

It's disappointing to see them regress this quickly in one song. Some of their worst '90s hits ("Little Miss Honky Tonk," "Mama Don't Get Dressed Up for Nothing") find them putting sexist words in the mouths of women, and this is another such example. The honky-tonk lady goes into a bar and demands the DJ switch from P Diddy (I doubt Ronnie even knows who that is) in favor of country music. While this one isn't nearly as misogynstic as a song with the phrase "buckle bunny" in it, it still loses points for the hook being so closely derivative of "Werewolves of London" that I'm surprised Warren Zevon's estate didn't sue. And for all the honky-tonk greats they name-drop (and for some reason, Keith Urban), the only female artist they could conjure up was Patsy Cline? Even Gretchen Wilson, who inspired this song, dug a little deeper by name-dropping Tanya Tucker. The production is also unnecessarily loud for no reason, and just like so many B&D songs, I'm not sure Kix was even in the studio at any point. What a waste of Ronnie, and of co-writer Terry McBride for that matter. C-

September 24: "A Real Fine Place to Start" by Sara Evans

You mean to tell me we got Rodney Crowell and a Radney Foster-George Ducas co-write to #1 in 2005? Awesome. This is easily one of her best by being one of his best. That guitar hook draws you in instantly, leading into "I'm gonna do it, darling / I could waste time trying to figure it out / But I'm jumpin' anyhow," which says so much with so few words. She's never been in love before, but she's finally found The One and it just feels too right to hold back any longer. And while it sounds so ordinary on paper, that production and infectious chorus -- replete with a Tom Petty reference -- absolutely soar. I can hear both writers on this, as the melody evokes "Nobody Wins" and "Lipstick Promises" in all the right ways. This song just brims with an anthemic sense of happiness. Right here, right now's the perfect spot, the perfect time to call this not only her best #1, but also one of her best period. A+

October 8: "Something to Be Proud Of" by Montgomery Gentry

Best of the year. This song uses the first verse to characterize the narrator's father as a story-teller, and how the younger narrator would initially be bored but ultimately become captivated. Later on, when the now-grown narrator is struggling to make ends meet and feeling like he's let down his father, in comes some of the best advice in country music: "If you're doing what you're able / And putting food there on the table / And providing for the family that you love / That's something to be proud of / And if all you ever really do is the best you can / Well, you did it, man." I can't tell you how many times I've cut myself down for being 37 and working two jobs just to spend it all on groceries and cat food -- before I realize hey, I'm better off than I was even two years ago, and way better off than I was in my 20s. The spacious, guitar-heavy production, and the inspired decision to have Eddie do the verses and Troy the chorus, make for a very memorable sound design. But ultimately, it's that second chorus and bridge that take this from a merely great story song to sharp, relatable life advice that hits me really hard in the heart every single time. A+

October 22: "Better Life" by Keith Urban

This song got hardly any airplay in my market, and I can't remember ever hearing it even once after it fell off the charts. I still have no idea how it managed to stay on top for six weeks, because it sure didn't feel like it did. But that's not a comment on its quality. I've always been bugged by the slightly mismatched scansion of the opening lines ("Friday night and the moon is high / I'm wide-awake just watchin' you sleep / And I promise you, you're gonna have / More than just the things that you need"). but the overall promise of "things will get better; just stick with me" is admirable. The melody and production are a bit tighter structured than "Somebody Like You," feeling almost like a march at times and helping to make it sound less like a clone of that song. And you can't go wrong with that ganjo. I could've wrongly dismissed this as filler, but I'm glad I gave it another listen, because it's way better than I remember. B+

December 3: "Come a Little Closer" by Dierks Bentley

Dierks Bentley tries to get his Conway Twitty on and succeeds. This one's a bit louder and rougher-edged than Conway got, but to me, that helps this make-out number feel all the more inspired. With that strong strum and his gravelly delivery, he feels like a slightly raw guy who wants to show a more passionate, sensitive side. Lyrically, it's what you'd expect among country make-out jams, helped with a clever double entendre about stripping it down to the basics. It's nothing mind-blowing or subversive, but it's different enough from the formula to stand on its own. This was the exact point where I considered his success not to be a fluke. B+

December 17: "Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off" by Joe Nichols

The image of a girl who gets drunk enough to lose clothing could be a bit squicky in the wrong hands, but Joe Nichols is too chill to sound like a creep. I also love how he's able to lean into the joke by suggesting she wear extra layers or imagining her come home in a tablecloth. (I remember my mom being amused by how nonchalantly he says she's "just havin' fun.") There's never a sense that she loses her sense of agency or is incapacitated enough for someone to take advantage of her -- it's just a light-hearted joke that you probably shouldn't take at face value. Despite how wordy it feels for a joke song, it never feels like it's too long, either. (Especially in the context of the previous single "What's a Guy Gotta Do," whose entire lyrics could fit in a fortune cookie.) We could use more fun songs like this now and then. B+

December 31: "Must Be Doin' Somethin' Right" by Billy Currington

Rivaling Dierks's take on Conway, we get Billy's take. I honestly didn't expect it after a fantastic drunk father song, a light-hearted radio ditty, and a terrible duet with Shania, but I'll more than welcome it. Billy's voice is deeper and a bit more laid-back than Dierks, and his melodic choices here flow a bit better. I also like how, instead of being confident in his success with his woman, this guy knows how unpredictable she is and is afraid of a wrong move. You can feel the relief when he realizes he's "on the right road" and making the right moves. I think it's that unpredictability that makes this song unique among country make-out songs; rarely is the guy so unsure. And you know me -- twisting a formula around is almost always a good move. A-

Every #1 Country Song of the 2000s: 2000

By Bobby Peacock

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January 1: "Breathe" by Faith Hill

I'm not as hard on this song as I used to be. That doesn't mean I love it; I just don't think it does anything wrong. I think at the time I was already burnt out on lush pop ballads thanks to my mom spinning Céline Dion so much. I still have an allergic reaction to the Diane Warren formula. But thankfully, where this one succeeds is by being considerably less cliché than its cohorts. "I can feel you breathe" is actually a pretty solid image that's easy to understand in the context of a grandiose love ballad. The vocals aren't nearly as histrionic as Faith would get on "There You'll Be" or "Where Are You, Christmas?" That said, every time I hear this song, my brain still automatically switches over to Cledus T. Judd's absolutely hilarious parody, "Breath." So yeah, nothing awful, just a merely okay pop ballad. B-

February 5: "Cowboy Take Me Away" by the Chicks

I'm a sucker for a good wanderlust song. It starts off strong with the lyric "I wanna touch the earth, I wanna break it in my hands / I wanna grow something wild and unruly" which is just such a sharp, distinct image. And it doesn't let up throughout the song, with pillows of blue bonnets, being out in the wild with no city buildings in sight, and all kinds of cowboy/western imagery. Each one makes sense and builds on the narrative, which is always a hallmark of this kind of song. It's hard to overstate just how damn good almost every Chicks song is, thanks to Natalie's bold voice and the crisp production and arrangements. The only reason this review seems so lackluster is because the high standards of their discography mean this song is only "great" in a sea full of amazing. A

February 26: "My Best Friend" by Tim McGraw

Sometimes it's hard to write much about a song that's just... there. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this song. It's pleasant, it has a solid sentiment behind the lyrics, Tim sings it well, but this song leaves little impact after I'm done listening to it. I had to look it up just to remember a single lyric from it. This feels like one that got to #1 entirely off the momentum of the huge hit before it, yet left no impact of its own. And sometimes that just... happens. Such is life on Music Row. B-

March 11: "Smile" by Lonestar

Sometimes it's hard to write much about a song that's just... there. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this song. It's pleasant, it has a solid sentiment behind the lyrics, Richie sings it well, but this song leaves little impact after I'm done listening to it. I had to look it up just to remember a single lyric from it. This feels like one that got to #1 entirely off the momentum of the huge hit before it, yet left no impact of its own. And sometimes that just... happens. Such is life on Music Row. B-

March 18: "How Do You Like Me Now?!" by Toby Keith

A lot of people even at the time painted this song as misogynistic and immature, but I never saw it. The guy is bragging about how much his life has improved for the better now that he's famous and his high school crush isn't. It's a narrative I can see a lot of people relating with, and on a meta level, it's a narrative Toby probably related with. This was a song his previous label had rejected, and his then-current label DreamWorks was hesitant to put it out after the predecessor ("When Love Fades") bombed. But it seems his instincts were for the best, as this was his first big crossover and the start of a new leg in his career. It's bold and cocky, but it's tempered with a playfulness that keeps it from feeling mean-spirited (such as the way the organ actually plays the "nyah nyah nyah" riff at the end). I think this song is just fun and those who dislike it either need to lighten up, or are letting his later more problematic material cast a shadow over this song. A

April 22: "The Best Day" by George Strait

One of the first times I heard this song, I was in the passenger seat of my dad's 18-wheeler somewhere in western Michigan. My parents divorced when I was 4, and over the years, his moving across the state meant I spent less and less time with him before his death. So the lyrics of memories shared with a father certainly resonate with me. Even if the final verse taking place at a wedding is predictable, the song's sentiment never feels mushy. It's helped by George Strait's calm read and the understated production; in particular, I like the tension created by the augmented chord in the opening riff. If I ranked all of George Strait's #1 hits, even counting only the Billboard ones, this would still be pretty high up there. And considering how stacked a deck that is, that's really saying something. A

May 13: "Buy Me a Rose" by Kenny Rogers feat. Alison Krauss and Billy Dean

After spending most of the '90s as nearly a non-entity, Kenny Rogers came back for a brief period with one of his best. This song's central theme of misguided attention toward a lover is already a cut above, but then you get to the twist, where he says "this is a story of you and me" and the song becomes ten times better. It's not just a story; by this point, it's an introspection -- an example of male vulnerability that I find so rare yet so compelling every time I come across it. Of course, Kenny's gravelly gravitas is in full force here, sounding tender and vulnerable against a calm, minimalistic production style with some very fine choices for vocal harmony. I always love it when veteran artists get one last rally with a great single, and this is truly one of his best on all fronts. A well-deserved comeback. A+

May 20: "The Way You Love Me" by Faith Hill

This one stumbles right out of the gate with the dodgy as hell grammar that even 13-year-old me could spot right away: "If I could grant you one wish / I wish you could see the way you kiss." It's not helped by the bland yet padded "Ooh, I love watching you, ooh, baby / When you're driving me, ooh, crazy," which just drives home the utter lack of effort on the lyrical front. It's like she wanted to capture the effervescent nature of "This Kiss" (as evidenced by that song also having the lyric "the way you love me") but just couldn't capture that lightning in a bottle. This is just forced and empty. Literally the only thing saving it from being an abject failure is the genuinely interesting double key change on the chorus. And hey, at least the country mix doesn't have those creepy Auto-Tuned backing vocals. But otherwise, this is like if someone tried to make a cake but left out most of the ingredients -- it's just a floppy, doughy mess with no flavor. D-

June 17: "Yes!" by Chad Brock

How Chad Brock ever got a record deal, I'll never know. I once compared his robotic singing voice to the title character of Free Guy. I had a "virtual singer" program on my Mac as a teen, and even it provided more nuanced vocal tracks. Which is a shame, because the underlying lyric could have worked. Even if the setup is contrived (he meets her because she moves into his old apartment and has mail in his name; they fall in love and marry), a more likable vocalist could've made it work by nailing the hook. I would've loved to hear someone more capable of a loose funny delivery, such as Toby Keith, take on this one. It's not at all hard to see why Chad Brock faded away so hard that I legit cannot find recordings of some of his later singles anywhere online. (To say nothing of his militant conservatism on social media.) Between Chad's personality-free vocal and the canned production (seriously, what's with that gurgly synth bass in the beginning that never shows up again?), all I can say is "No!" (And be thankful that at least this isn't the Y2K version of "A Country Boy Can Survive.") C-

July 8: "I Hope You Dance" by Lee Ann Womack feat. Sons of the Desert

Even at the time, I knew this was as out-of-character for Lee Ann as Alan Jackson covering Lil Wayne. A singer known for twangy, traditional, timeless fare like "A Little Past Little Rock" turns in a cold, sterile, pop ballad with no semblance of country whatsoever -- maybe it could have worked if she sounded like she wanted to be there, or if the lyrics had anything to say. This is a style of songwriting I just never liked, the way it just strings a bunch of random positive phrases together with no through line or narrative (which really set off "sellout" alarms in my head even at the time). It's like someone just cracked open a bunch of fortune cookies and just picked out the ones that rhymed. I've never understood why this is pitched as a mother-to-daughter song, when lines like "I hope you never lose your sense of wonder / Get your fill to eat, but always feel that hunger" are so broad-stroke as to instantly cover the entire canvas in beige. This played well to the Chicken Soup for the Soul crowd, but to me, it's so flavorless it makes Campbell's condensed seem like a gourmet meal in comparison. Literally the only interesting facet is Sons of the Desert's counterpoint on the chorus, but even that was scrubbed from the pop edit. D-

August 12: "What About Now" by Lonestar

This song starts off with a damn good line: "The sign in the window said for sale or trade / On the last remaining dinosaur that Detroit made / $700 was a heck of a deal / For a 400 horsepower jukebox on wheels." It's so full of vivid imagery of hitting the road and blasting some tunes with the one you love. Richie McDonald sounds like he's having fun, and the production is on point. However, there's one thing holding this back: it has a very weak melody. Nearly all of the verse is just this repeated so-mi-so-mi-so-mi-so pattern with no variation, and it doesn't get much more varied at the chorus. It's a shame the melody drags this down, because otherwise this would be one of the best post-"Amazed" cuts from a band that would spend much of this decade embarrassing themselves. B

September 9: "It Must Be Love" by Alan Jackson

I'm sorry, what was that about murder on Music Row again? Wedged between what is widely considered a high point for country music and this, a freaking Don Williams cover? AJ covering the Gentle Giant is such a no-brainer, as they both thrive on laid-back meat and potatoes fare like this. The production is the same twang you'd expect from him, not far removed from the Everything I Love album yet somehow just a tiny bit more energetic than Don's original. And it's such a simple lyric about the power of love, another theme both artists in question are quite familiar with. This one goes down so smoothly without ever feeling inconsequential, and I think it's easily a draw as to which version of this song is better -- AJ didn't change much because he didn't have to. It's just good. A

September 16: "That's the Way" by Jo Dee Messina

I've never been a fan of Jo Dee Messina's style. She never seemed to have the sass of Shania, the pipes of Faith or Martina, or the brains of Trisha -- most of her songs just felt "there" to me. However, this one works for me. It has a pretty neat opening riff full of acoustic guitar and chimes, even finding a few places to fit in a güiro. The melody is full of clever modulations, and Jo Dee sounds a lot less plastic than she usually does by finding a way to sing the chorus slightly differently each time. And honestly, it's one of the better lyrics she's picked, too. "I know from experience nothing's ever gonna make perfect sense" is a really head-turning lyric in all the right ways. I'm still not much of a fan of hers, but revisiting this after a long hiatus, I'm amazed that this one -- despite being her longest-tenured #1 and highest Hot 100 entry -- never had the staying power of "Bye Bye" or "I'm Alright," because I actually think it's slightly better than those. A- 

October 14: "Kiss This" by Aaron Tippin

2000 was apparently the year of the comeback. I always found it strange that despite his blue-collar image, two of Aaron Tippin's three #1 hits were novelty songs. And as someone who derives their usual Internet handle from one of Aaron Tippin's novelty songs, I don't object to that -- he has the goofy energy to pull a lot of this off. Case in point: a clever way of phrasing the insult "kiss my ass." It's a standard revenge narrative with a few cheeky lines (no pun intended), but the delivery is where it shines. He drops into a lower register than usual, then twangs it back up on the chorus accompanied by a crowd of female vocals (one of whom is his own wife). Simple as the lyrics are, this is a song that, like most humor, hinges on the delivery. And on that front, it succeeds. B+

October 28: "The Little Girl" by John Michael Montgomery

You know you messed up when your "motivational" Jesus song has holes in it that even a 13-year-old can see. Even at the time, I knew how massively contrived this was: a kid watches her parents die in a murder-suicide, and then is taken in by religious foster parents. She sees a picture of Jesus and says "that's the man who was by my side when my parents died." (No doubt it was one of the stock images of Jesus as a white man -- again, something I knew even at 13 was not the case.) There's no implication of trauma, and no other emotion from the girl. It's the same sort of manipulative schlock that Snopes termed "glurge" -- attempts to be motivational that are so over-the-top that you can't help but wonder how anyone believes them. Even before social media, this sort of glop was circulated via chain e-mails (in fact, that's literally how this song came to be; writer Harley Allen saw it in an e-mail). While JMM's read is remarkably free of bombast, that means nothing when something this crass and manipulative is even committed to a recording studio, never mind sent out as a single. Do yourself a favor and listen to "Friends," "No Man's Land," or any of the other great JMM songs that fell into that void of forgotten post-"Sold (The Grundy County Auction Incident)" gems in his catalog and skip this entirely. (And skip whatever the hell "Nothing Catches Jesus by Surprise" was, too.) F

November 18: "Best of Intentions" by Travis Tritt

I don't know what happened, but after 1996's The Restless Kind, Travis Tritt seemed to entirely lose his spark. Nothing else he put out afterward had anywhere near the emotional investment of his earlier ballads like "Anymore" or "Drift Off to Dream," nor the swagger of "Here's a Quarter (Call Someone Who Cares)" or "T-R-O-U-B-L-E." He just became... boring. Admittedly, this is one of his better cuts in that timespan. This is a man asking for forgiveness for not pulling his weight in the relationship, telling his apparently soon-to-be-ex that he tried his best and is disappointed that he couldn't satisfy her. I think the song structure is interesting too, with two verses, the chorus twice, then a third verse. I think the only thing holding it back is that it lacks the power of his earlier ballads. If he'd cut this in 1993, the song would just soar by that second chorus. I don't know who's to blame here -- either Billy Joe Walker Jr.'s production style was too muted, or Travis just couldn't recapture the energy of his early days. Either way, it's a damn good lyric, and I'm sure he had the best of intentions delivering it, but it really is missing that special something. B

November 25: "Just Another Day in Paradise" by Phil Vassar

Phil Vassar started his career writing slightly left-of-center slice-of-life songs. His early material includes such gems as chasing after one's ex in her Isuzu; being ghosted by someone staying at a Ramada in Birmingham; and picking up a chatty hitchhiker with her own story to tell. That same energy carried into his first album, where after reuniting with a high school flame in "Carlene," we now see the ups and downs of domestic life. Children are fighting, the milk's gone bad, and the romantic candlelight dinner is Domino's, but that's okay, because you're still with the one you love. It's so utterly charming, eccentric, and sunny that it's impossible not to love. Phil gives a bright delivery against a nicely jaunty melody. It's actually kind of a shame he used up so much of his good material so quickly. A

December 2: "We Danced" by Brad Paisley

Another artist whose early career was also full of interesting slice-of-life songs got his second #1 just afterward. "We Danced" has an interesting narrative about meeting someone who left her purse behind at a bar after hours, then dancing with her and starting up a conversation. It sounds like something that could have actually happened, and never feels contrived. I think Brad generally came off more charismatic earlier in his career, and this song is proof. It's gentle and mellow, yet never soporific. Low-stakes songs like this can be boring if they aim too low (see the "My Best Friend"/"Smile" reviews above), but this one hits the sweet spot. A-

December 16: "My Next Thirty Years" by Tim McGraw

I haven't confirmed this, but I've been told that Tim has never sung this song in concert because he doesn't like it. And I don't know why. He should have more shame toward "Indian Outlaw" or "Truck Yeah" than this. Songs about taking stock of advancing age can come off as navel-gazing or preachy, but this one doesn't overshoot. I think it helps that it's another early Phil Vassar lyric. And as someone whose family has a long history of alcoholism, the line "Drink a little lemonade and not so many beers" gets a thumbs-up from me. Maybe it's because I'm in my 30s now too, but this song has aged amazingly well, and I feel just about anyone could get something out of its inspiring message. (And then once you're done, listen to Rodney Crowell's "Earthbound" and Trout Fishing in America's "Who Knows What We Might Do.") A-