Farce the Music: Jo Dee Messina

Jul 23, 2020

Major League Baseball Country Reaction Gifs

Honky tonk badonkadonk

Keepin' perfect rhythm make you wanna swing along

I ain't as good as I once was

But I'm as good once as I ever was

When Chris Stapleton blasts a three run homer in the 8th to take back the lead

Your cheatin' heart will tell on you

When they're playing Luke Bryan over the PA system

Is it cold in here, or is it just you?

When your give a damn's busted

(this is from the minors, but it had to be here)

What you think of that new Parmalee song?

Somebody said there'd be no normal live concerts until 2022. Yeah, that's fine... no big deal.

The Florida-Georgia Line of baseball

Jun 17, 2020

Top 10 Biggest Jerks in 2000s Country

Some would imagine that the fan-friendly, upbeat country music scene of 2000-2009 would not be as likely to contain divas and d-bags as the more recent country music diaspora. Some would be very, very wrong. Here are some of the genre's most egregious offenders.

10. Jo Dee Messina

Brings a Coke can into church so she has somewhere to spit her dip. Constantly brags about her Peloton.

9. Billy Currington

Once fought with an old guy about a boat wake or something. [edit: being told this actually happened]

Considers his duet with Shania Twain the highpoint of her career.

8. Sara Evans

At concerts, will only perform her biggest hits as spoken word. Made Trick Pony use a utility closet as a dressing room when they opened for her.

7. Brad Paisley

Working with legal team to get “dad jokes” copyrighted so he can sue everybody who uses the term. When people join his group text promotion, he sells their numbers to escort services.

6. Dierks Bentley

Publicly and profanely humiliates anyone who misspells his name. Eats Taco Bell on his bus. Uses the bathroom on his band’s bus.

5. Phil Vassar

Plays “Bobbi with an I” as his encore at concerts. Avoids eye contact with anyone shorter than him. Has an album of Drake covers coming out soon.

4. Cyndi Thomson

Bogarts the joint. “I Crossfit” is her entire Facebook bio. Won’t use the zipper merge in traffic.

3. Steve Holy

Cheats at foosball. Won’t flush a floater. Performs Tekashi 6ix9ine songs on Tik Tok.

2. Mark Wills

Covers a Wheeler Walker Jr. song when he sees there are lots of kids at his concert. Still does the “flaming bag of shit” prank on neighbors despite being in his 40s. Has long conversations in front of what you need at Walmart.