Free Bieber

http://www.cnn.com/2014/01/23/showbiz/justin-bieber-arrest/

Lyrics Illustrated: FGL/Luke Bryan - This Is How We Roll

Misheard Lyrics: George Strait

Ocean Front Property

Lyric Parody: Zac Brown Band - Sweet Annie

"Sweet Fanny"

(Parody of ZBB's "Sweet Annie")

(As sung by a bro-country songwriter)

I been drinkin' Lite

And leaning against this fender

Pretty girls and brain dead bros seem to be my line of work

Believe me when I say, I impressed by all your splendor

This man might be too old for you, but baby turn around

Sweet fanny

Can I stare at you a while

Then I'll write a song that's vile when we part,

Sweetheart I live life like a fraternity

And you've got just what I like

And with every song I write

I push misogyny 

Sweet fanny

Sweet fanny

Don't know how you're so round and tight

But those Daisy Dukes and your college glutes are just what I prefer

Your big and bodacious bootay, sugar shakes when you bend over

Dance around, to fake country sounds, please don't think I'm a perv

Sweet fanny

Can I stare at you a while

Then I'll write a song that's vile when we part,

Sweetheart I live life like a fraternity

And you've got just what I like

And with every song I write

I push misogyny 

Sweet fanny

Sweet fanny

Oh what a sight

There ain't too much fat in 'em

This'll go platinum

A plaque in my den

To tell the truth, my thoughts don't run much deeper

Did you just call me a creeper?

No please don't call the cops again

Sweet fanny

Can I stare at you a while

Then I'll write a song that's vile when we part,

Sweetheart I live life like a fraternity

And you've got just what I like

And with every song I write

I push misogyny 

Sweet fanny

Sweet fanny

Little Known Facts: January '14

14 states have added Tim McGraw to their registered sex offender

list because of his song "Lookin' For That Girl".

The Reverend Horton Heat has never heard a who.

Luke Bryan named his penis "Mashed Potato."

Vanilla Ice stated in a recent interview that he thinks

"hick hop rappers are giving white rappers a bad name."

Every joke about Justin Moore that has been posted on FTM has gone over his head.

If you ask a Brantley Gilbert fan to show you their credentials, they will remove their teeth.

Wynonna recently auditioned for the role of Oompa Loompa Queen for Willie Wonka 2.

This "fact" is only here to improve FTM website traffic from 

bro-country listeners performing Google searches: Country haterz is loosers.

If the guys in Florida Georgia Line had an STD..... Never mind.

Clay Walker has decided to sell out to gain relevance; 

unfortunately the people he's trying to appeal to don't know what "relevance" means.

Cole Swindell learned all his best dance moves from Carlton on the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.

If you badmouth Shooter Jennings, he will kick your ass, 

unless you're over 5 foot tall then he'll probably kick your knee.

According to a 2013 Gary Levox arrest warrant, Golden Corral does not 

allow you to double dip chicken legs into the chocolate fountain.

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Most of these by Jeremy Harris.