Showing posts with label Keith Urban. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Keith Urban. Show all posts

Nov 21, 2019

This Guy Rants About The CMA Entertainer of the Year Award Controversy


Garth Brooks won the CMA entertainment of the year award and everybody’s in there feelings about it. I’m a little mad myself sense Keith Urban didn’t win it, but that’s not why other people are all salty. They think, get this, that Carry Underwood or Eric Church shoulda won. LMOA! On one side you’ve got all the feminists who want women to win everything and rule the world (go rule over the laundry room, lol). On the other side, you’ve got hipster country fans who think Eric Church is any good. 

There both wrong! If Keith Urban couldn’t win it Garth is the man! I’ve seen garth live at least 5 times and it was a damn party! He ran around like a crazy person and climbed on stuff and yelled! It was bad ass. And Garth is one of the inventors of country music. How could you not know that? Him and Tim McGraw are the first people to make country music worth listening too so I consider them the pine ears of the music! 

Now lets look at Eric Church. He’s obviously on drugs sense he never takes off his shades. And his songs are all complicated and shit. I just want to here about not going down till the sun comes up and drinking two peenya coladas and friends being in low places but he sings about monsters and being desperate or some crap. That’s not country! And he sings about that liberal loon Bruce Springsting to. I don’t know anybody who listens to that lefty crap so why would I want to hear a song about him?? Duh.

Now Carry Underwood is hot. I’ll give you that. She’s real entertaining if you turn the sound off, you know what I’m saying? But when you have to here her voice, it’s awful. And she sings about love all the time. She’s also a liberal deep state member. It’s crazy we let these people into country music in the first place! She’s a vagrant too! That means she doesn’t eat any meat products. What.the.f.? Both her and Eric don’t want me to have my collection of bazookas and Gatling guns. Damn gun grabbers. Neither one of them deserves to be the entertainment of the month at Chucky Cheese’s much less for the hole country music asociation.

My final comment is: scoreboard! Garth won. Get over it. You can’t try to get rid of him like your trying to do too a certain other American hero right now. God blessed country music an America!


Sep 18, 2019

Pro Wrestler / Country Singer Equivalents 2019

Keith Urban = Dolph Ziggler
Stupid hair. Been around for a long time.
One of the most talented but always seems to let us down.


Dan + Shay = Glacier & Ernest Miller
Uh, there's two of them.
Good at something probably, but not their chosen field.


Kacey Musgraves = Becky Lynch
 Badass. Stands up for women.
The diehards have always loved her, but she
just went big-time in 2018.


George Jones = Jeff Hardy
One of the greats. Known for showing up in bad shape or not at all.
Has had his photo taken in front of a wall at the police station several times.
(Thanks to Cherryll Batty for this idea!)


Morgan Wallen & Hardy = The Godwinns
Nobody can be this redneck in real life.


Zac Brown = Baron Corbin
Dresses stupid. Not much hair.
Pretty talented but so damn annoying that you honestly just want him to go away.


Kane Brown = The Gobbledy Gooker
Hyped heavily. Made a big splash at first, but once everybody found
out he was lame, nobody was interested any more.


Jul 12, 2019

The Current Poop of Mainstream Country: July '19

A poop emoji is negative; a strike-thru is positive.


The current Poop Rating of the Mediabase Top 20 is (-10) overall which is a 6 point improvement from January (the previous time we did this chart). The best song on the chart is Eric Church’s “Some of It.”  The worst is Thomas Rhett’s “Look What God Gave Her” (though there is very stiff competition from FGL and Luke Bryan). The biggest surprise for me is that Keith Urban’s current single isn’t too bad. I can’t remember the last time one of his singles wasn’t unlistenable pop dreck. Women are faring a little better on the chart now, but only marginally.

Chart info from Mediabase/Country Aircheck.


May 16, 2019

Why 1989 Was Better Than 2019

Country mullet 1989

Country mullet 2019

Kane 1989

Kane 2019

Fad 1989

Fad 2019

Social media 1989

Social media 2019


Keith Urban 1989

Keith Urban 2019

Country duo 1989

"Country" duo 2019

Lifted truck 1989

Lifted truck 2019

2Pac 1989

2Pac 2019


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