Showing posts with label Patsy Cline. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Patsy Cline. Show all posts

Sep 8, 2022

Chevy Chase Country Reaction Gifs

 I’m the fool in love with the fool that’s still in love with you


When your sugar mama thinks you’re too young to know a Patsy Cline song


BRB, bout to shoot my woman down


When your son casually references a Walker Hayes song in conversation


When you’re playing kids songs for story hour at the library and a kid requests “Wagon Wheel”


If Farce the Music got a dollar every time we rehashed the same old Luke Bryan jokes


No, I’m DOCTOR Jukebox, you’re thinking of Joshua Hedley


When there’s an Americana festival in El Paso


When the pastor prays the demons of bluegrass, ganja, and chicks with neck tattoos out of you


Aug 31, 2022

Country Music Fantasy Football Team Names 2022

Haven't done these in a while so here we go, with help from Twitter pals. The ones not attributed are by yours truly, Trailer. 


There Stands the Kupp


The Night They Drove McCaffrey Down


Jerry Reed Options @Misery_n_Gin


Cross Canadian Football League @lhcountryboy


Feathered Commanders


Shotgun Willie @ReadWatchDo


Why Ja’Marr in Here Looking Like That


Touchdown Troubadours @theadamdrake


Why Brady Why


Punt Flicker Pass @JWOutlaw13


Wagon Wheel Route (Adam Drake)


Lost Dak Street Band @TreyBlair33


Mike Evans & The Moonpies (Trey)


Turnpike Goin' For Twobadours @brianmather


Sunday Night Blues


Mammas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Deshaun Watson @FriendDevin


All the Gould in California


The Cody Wolves @Robberino


Cast No Picks


Delta Down @JonMDanforth


The Charles Wesley Go Routes @wilkins63


If Dick Butkus is Up, Why Am I Down


Lynyrd Pigskynyrd @DavidJoy_Author


Lost on 30 Akers


Shenandoah Checkdown @JArnoldTAMU85


Are You Sure Lombardi Done It This Way (Adam Drake)


Jason IsBall @RCHoyt34 


Tonight the Waddle Let Me Down


Streets of Lambeaufield @thatjohnhammond


Houston Oilers Marchman (LH Country Boy)


Sweet Dreams (of a W) @JenJenMichelle


I Will Make You Hurts


Wichita Offensive Lineman @ShawnC96WL


Drive-By Justin Tuckers (Shawn)


The Rita Ballou 42s @The_Reliant


Deebo & Lefty


Matt Stafford & The 400 Unit @mrbalusek


Townes Van Slant @knotts632


Kittle Bitty


Muscadine First Down Line @Western_Grunge


Chase Daniels, If You Please


Grieving, I’m a Jets Fan


Jun 19, 2020

Simp Actually Enjoys Hearing Women Sing Country Music

Written By This Guy?

Ft. Lauderdale - A male country fan has confessed to actually liking country music performed by women. Florida panhandle man Harvey Christian counts himself a fan of Carrie Underwood, Miranda Lambert, AND Ashley McBryde, among others. The simp finds their shrill and annoying voices somehow enjoyable. Really.

Studies by mainstream country research firms have proven time and again that female singers should only be the exception and not the rule when programming radio playlists. Tomatoes in the salad, if you will. And yet, this purported country music fan truly finds chick songs to be engaging and of artistic merit. P****-whipped! 

“The women sing about subjects of substance more often than their male counterparts,” said the wuss. “And even when their songs are light-hearted, I find them more engaging and memorable.” LOL, I guess he’s never listened to Dustin Lynch!

While other real men listen to stalwarts like Florida-Georgia Line, Luke Bryan, and Sam Hunt, Harvey-freaking-Christian is white knighting all over social media about how much he loves Margo Price and Mickey Guyton. It’s nearly certain he’s just trying to get into some liberal babe’s pants. We don’t buy it. 

“No, I’m happily married and my wife listens to jazz and pop so I’m not trying to impress anybody,” insisted the pansy. “I am telling you the gospel truth when I say that I truly find pleasure in hearing females perform country and western music.” Liar. Data says even women don’t like women singing, so what’s the deal??

“I even love the classics like Patsy Cline, Tammy Wynette, and Loretta Lynn,” sucks up Christian. “They didn’t get the due as they deserved in their time.” Patsy’s dead, loser, she’s not going to read this!

At press time, this subservient wimp was queuing up some Lori McKenna, to get in his feelings or whatever. 


Dec 3, 2019

Had a Mullet / Should've Had a Mullet 2

Had a mullet

 Had a mullet

Had a mullet

Should've had a mullet

 Had a mullet

Should've had a mullet 

 Had a mullet

 Had a mullet

 Should've had a mullet

Should've had a mullet

Most definitely had a mullet

Had a mullet

Mar 21, 2019

Pineapple Express Country Reaction Gifs

*foul language warning*
----------

When you're playing "Crazy" too fast because you're crazy

Did you have a good time in the pit at the Vandoliers show?

When somebody says Dustin Lynch's new EP is country music at its best

Bullshit! That guy nobody listens to didn't really claim to have 600k real followers on Twitter

Kane Brown sucks...

When somebody plays Mitchell Tenpenny in your vicinity

When you meet somebody who hates Florida-Georgia Line as much as you do

Wanna hit up the Luke Bryan concert with me?

Trailer, of Farce the Music, in real life (minus the long hair)

Jun 27, 2018

If (Classic Country Song) Was Bro-Country


Since bro-country seems to be making a slight return this summer, it seems like a good time to bring back this feature.

If (Classic Country Song) Was Bro-Country
--------------


Patsy Cline - She's Got You

I've got your picture
That you Snapped to me
Screen-shot it with love
Showed it to my homies
Ain't nothing different
Since we've been through
I've got your picture
It's a nude




Waylon & Willie - Mammas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys

Mammas don't let your babies grow up to soyboys
Don't let 'em dip pouches or vote for no cucks
Let 'em be hotties and frat boys and such
Mammas don't let your babies grow up to soyboys
'Cause they'll never lift, bro, and they'll never roll coal
They won't even drive a truck




Tammy Wynette - Stand By Your Man

Stand by your man,
In cut off shorts that cling to,
That shaker mama gave you 
Move that thing like a pony




Dwight Yoakam - Guitars, Cadillacs

Now it's roll bars, rifle racks, Lil Dicky music
Dusty gravel roads that I chill on
Yeah my roll bars, rifle racks, Lil Dicky music
Keep this party lit till the night is gone


Jun 15, 2018

Keith Urban Vandalizes Country Music Hall of Fame


Country music superstar Keith Urban was arrested Thursday for causing nearly two million dollars worth of damage at Nashville's Country Music Hall of Fame. Urban, 50,  was booked on charges of felony vandalism, trespassing, and destruction of property. He was released after posting $250,000 bail. A court hearing is scheduled for June 20.

Witnesses say they were surprised to see Urban strolling through the facility alone. That wasn't the strangest thing they'd see. "A few people immediately recognized him and were crowding around for autographs," said museum guest Carl Jenkins. "I thought it was weird he was out in public without security… and he was wearing this big whop-sided backpack with box-cutters and stuff falling out of it."

Carl said Urban took a ball-peen hammer from his pack and asked the surrounding crowd to please excuse him. "He climbed over the barrier and smashed the shit out of Hank Williams Sr's guitar," said Jenkins. "It was crazy, there wasn't nothing left but wire and sawdust when he was through."

Urban then defaced at least 15 of the bas relief Hall of Fame member plaques, including Fred Rose, Tammy Wynette, and Don Schlitz, spray painting such things as phalluses and the word "fart" across them. He also sprayed deer scent all over the iconic "Will the Circle Be Unbroken" inscription with a Super Soaker water gun. 

Before leaving the Hall, Urban also hurled DeFord Bailey's harmonica down a hallway, poured a kale smoothie on several Nudie suits, and cut all the fringe off one of Patsy Cline's outfits. 

Museum staff and security never intervened during Urban's rampage because they thought he was just 'pushing the boundaries of his art or filming a prank show or something.' When all was said and done, however, the Kiwi country guitar slinger had caused real and lasting damage on country's hallowed halls. Urban was taken into custody without incident at his home later that evening. 

While neither Urban nor his wife Nicole Kidman could be reached for comment, Keith's manager told us he doesn't expect Keith's reputation or career to take a hit over the situation because he's very handsome and such a good guitar player.


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