Showing posts with label Colt Ford. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Colt Ford. Show all posts

Aug 19, 2016

Office Space Country Reaction Gifs

When an office mate keeps playing 
Colt Ford at a loud volume

 What one could do about that problem 
if management doesn't take care of it...

 Hey man, you like that new Reckless Kelly song?

When a co-worker listened to FGL song on my computer 
while I was out of the office...

Listening to  Gangstagrass like...

When ur jus jealious haterz and Blake Shelton is more 
handsomer and richer then u will evr B in ur whole life

When every country station in town is playing 
either Chris Lane or Thomas Rhett

 Hey, Kane Brown fans....

Mar 31, 2016

That Ain't Right

(Johnny and June contrasted with modern country "love" lyrics)

WWE Country Reaction Gifs 7: Jason Isbell, Chase Rice, Jana Kramer, etc.

Wrestlemania 32 is this Sunday, so of course we're having an edition of stupid gifs this week.

When a coworker asks if you know anybody 
who'd want their extra Chase Rice ticket

When somebody passes you "whiskey" 
that turns out to be Fireball

When somebody asks how many studio albums 
Jason Isbell has released

When Jana Kramer's mom hears how bad her new song is

When the Stapleton pre-sale code hits your inbox

When Tyler Hubbard practices his only talent

When your buddies think it'd be fun
to go see Colt Ford just for laughs

Mar 30, 2016

John Rich's Songwriting Tips #77

From the mailbag:

Kevin in Georgia writes: With the reduction of mainstream radio playlists, the consolidation of media and record labels, and the greatly lowered number of songwriters actually getting cuts in Nashville, is there really any point to trying to break into the business if you're not willing to kiss corporate ass or make friends with douchebag up-and-coming singers?

Me: No.

Kayla in Texas asks: My boyfriend is a good-looking white rapper inspired by Sam Hunt and Colt Ford. What's the best way for him to break into the country music business?

Me: Record a half-dozen YouTube videos of him covering country artists he's never heard of and won't sound anything like ….and wait.

Josh in Ohio writes: How do you balance performing, songwriting, running businesses, and having a family with your true loves of ego and alcohol?

Me: Well, Josh. If you care to drive your anonymous ass down to Nashville and ask that to my face, I'll give you a little insight. I'll put my foot so deep insight your ass, you won't ask me something like that again.

Vanessa in Washington State wants to know: Do you think the success of Chris Stapleton will open the doors for authentic, gritty country music and should songwriters anticipate that shift by writing more story-driven and emotional songs?

Me: I know, Vanessa, I'm worried too. I'm hoping this is just a trend like the great credibility scare of the late 80s. Nashville righted the ship then, and they'll do it now. Don't you fear. There may be a few months of hard twang, whining steel, earnest lyrics, and a general lack of flash, but in no time at all, this town will get back to its roots and deliver the pandering, trend-driven, sexy pop music we know and love. Stay strong, y'all!!

Dec 17, 2015

Star Wars/Country Music Doppelgängers 2

The Force Awakens starts today! In honor, here are some
(occasionally reaching) Star Wars character/Country singer doppelgängers.

Darius Rucker (R&B phase) and Mace Windu

Don Williams and Obi Wan Kenobi

Chris Stapleton and Chewbacca (sorry Chris!)

Willie Nelson and Qui Gon Jinn

Colt Ford and Jek Porkins (hey, don't blame me... that's his name)

Kenny Chesney and Bib Fortuna

Dec 15, 2015

Little Known Facts: Christmas 2015 Edition

This is a special extra long Jeremy & Trailer collaborative Christmas edition of Little Known Facts. Some artists get two facts...

John Rich celebrates the holidays by adding a couple ounces of eggnog to his mug of bourbon.

Colt Ford and Frosty The Snowman wear the same size pants. 

A Christmas Story is Gary Levox's favorite Christmas movie. 
He always cries during that emotional scene when the dogs eat the Christmas dinner.

Santa decided to skip the Levox house this year because someone always beat him to the cookies. 

Shooter Jennings doesn't wear red coats during December
because someone always tries to put him on a shelf.

Shooter Jennings had to delay his upcoming album "Countach (for Giorgio)"
until next year to allow him to spend more time working in Santa's workshop. 

With his new contract Chad Brock is experiencing a resurgence of popularity
but unfortunately some of the children pee on his lap while giving their wish list. 

Every year around this time Farce The Music is overwhelmed with emails asking to post Scotty McCreery
on a shelf pics. 99% of those come from addresses ending with 

All Luke Bryan wants for Christmas is his two front ...testicles.

Santa will have a reindeer shit on the floor of anyone that posted #WhoIsChrisStapleton in 2015. 

Jason Aldean only watches the first 20 minutes of How the Grinch Stole Christmas.

Instead of receiving coal in their stockings this year, badly-behaved
country singers will be forced to share a dressing room with Mojo Nixon. 

73% of Brantley Gilbert fans are more concerned with making
 the warden's nice list than they are with Santa Claus' list. 

Old Dominion hopes they get switches for Christmas, because they're perverts.

Bucky Covington is hoping the mild weather continues throughout Christmas. He says it sucks
when your spray bottle of water freezes while cleaning windshields at a Nashville red light. 

Country singer Sam Hunt celebrates Christmas by dressing in outlandish costumes
and knocking on neighbors' doors asking for candy.

Frankie Ballard decorates his home for Christmas with… wait, who the hell is Frankie Ballard?!?

The only item on Martin Shkreli's Christmas list is a Kane Brown album. 

Christmas is a special time of year that can bring a smile to anyone's face. 
Except Kenny Rogers anytime after 2011. 

Bucky Covington always gets kicked out of the record label's Christmas party 
for being too drunk and because he doesn't work there.

Oct 28, 2015

You're Not a Real Country Singer! Part 2!

What the hell? Let's do the next part today as well. Here are some more…

You're Not a Real Country Singer if…

Your music is played at the Electric Cowboy -Colby Cummings

Your newest single has “Akins, Gorley, Davidson” in the songwriting credits. -Chris Busto

you went to a Rascal Flatts concert and were inspired -@mattson_rainer

your cowboy boots are only ankle high.  I’m looking at you Luke Bryan. -@ChrisJohnson036

you wear joggers or jeggings. I’m looking at you @SamHuntMusic -@RCCampbell52

You don’t wear a cowboy hat because it would cover up your Macklemore-style hair-cut...
-J Christopher Smith

you have your own scented candle named after you -@tabithanichol1

Your wardrobe costs more than your guitar collection. -Sam Gazdziak

you feel the need to inform people any chance you get that you are a real country singer.

You haven’t put out a song that was later remixed with a washed up rapper. -Chris Jackson

you only recognize Waylon Jennings because he was on The Dukes of Hazzard. -John Band Deery

you’ve recorded a song with colt ford -@parker__manning

...Anal bleaching is on the to-do list. -Josh Gourley

 If you cant name the original members of the Highway men -Alana Y. James

If Your songs have EDM beats -Kevin Ross

There’s no twang besides a out of place banjo in your songs -Jordan Pancho Kirk

If you’re sponsored by Axe body spray and fireball. -Luke Langford

if your biggest influence is Fred Durst -Mada Drake

you rhyme “party” with “Bacardi.”  -@DarkKnight292

you spend an hour on Urban Dictionary for hip new phrases to include in your lyrics.

Bobby Bones is your biggest promoter -Brandon Ferguson

if you don’t sing about momma, trains, prison or getting drunk. -@PJrenee72

If there’s no fiddle, steel or banjo backing you. -@alisonbonaguro

You don’t drink whisky because its not organic and free-trade. -J Christopher Smith

you namedrop Justin Timberlake in your songs. -@realcountryview

If your backstage rider requests include watermelon vape juice and
a crowbar to get you out of your jeans. -@GreenEyedLilo

three words: “feat. Jason Derulo” -@emperorcupcake2

Your name is Tyler Hubbard or Brian Kelley -Greg Sury

Oct 27, 2015

Little Known Facts: Halloween Edition

Shooter Jennings recently found his He-Man costume from 3rd grade and 
decided to wear it this year since it still fits. 

Colt Ford scrapped plans to go as someone less talented than himself when 
he couldn't find a Big Smo outfit. 

After being up late with a cranky baby, Jason Isbell will accidentally put on 
Amanda Shires' pants on the 31st and walk out dressed as Sam Hunt. 

Somewhere in Georgia a hay-wagon hitch will break and nearly cancel the hayride 
but all will be saved by Brantley Gilbert's wallet chain. 

Hunter Hayes has been spotted at Sam's Club buying gallon tubs of vaseline to 
grease his face up because just a fat suit isn't enough to look like Gary Levox. 

In 2012 Hank Williams Jr dressed as Chewbacca but everyone knew it was him 
because he was constantly yelling "I'm Hank Williams Jr, bitch!."

On October 31st Dale Watson will wake up and dress like a badass. Just like every other day. 

This year Chad Brock will be dressed as a homeless man on the streets of Nashville. 
He will remain in costume through 2018. 

Florida Georgia Line decided to not dress as what they believe to be the greatest country duo 
of all time because they couldn't decide which one had to be Big Kenny. 

Tyler Farr will be arrested on Halloween for parking a hearse outside 
a neighbor kid's bedroom and throwing popcorn balls at the window. 

After a bad experience with Wynonna's spray tan artist Dolly Parton will be stopped at 
the local farmers market for being suspected of smuggling two pumpkins out the door. 

Chris Stapleton's costume will not be seen by most of the country but 
people that actually know things will agree it's the best costume this year. 

Ray Wylie Hubbard will dress as a geriatric Danny Zuko. The other 364 days of the year
this is referred to as "the Ray Wylie Hubbard look."

By Jeremy Harris


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