More Monday Memes: Brantley Gilbert, Morgan Wallen, Sturgill Simpson

Reginald Spears vs. Garth Brooks, Brantley Gilbert, and Jason Aldean

Georgia Country Artists Parody Album Covers

Wrasslin' Country Reaction Gifs #73

Try that in a small ring

Describe Brantley Gilbert fans in one word

When you've been hating Aldean's music for 11 years and everybody's just now catching up

When your stoner friend from high school sees you at a Zach Bryan concert

Pop-country singers describing their difficult upbringing

Americana fans to pop-country fans

Leaving work when you got a Hank Jr. show that night

When the tall guy won't get out of the way at the show

Them: You don't like Aldean? You must be a Democrat groomer anti-American

Me:

Country Twitter Wins: July '23

 

Laying Down the Law

 Based on this (which isn't funny but everything gets made into a meme so).

Country Radio Celebrates Black History Month by Playing Songs With “Black” in Title

The two major country radio station conglomerates, Cumulus and iHeart, are coming together this month for a common cause. iHeart Assistant VP of Marketing Karen Humes made the announcement yesterday via Instagram that the rivals had launched a Black History Month program to bring awareness to the plights and successes of African Americans.

“In solidarity with all who celebrate and support Black History Month, both Cumulus and iHeart have banded together for a special celebration of “black” this month.” she began. “As such, we plan to add to our playlists, shows, and specials many songs in which the word “black” is in the title.”

Ms. Humes went on to list several of the songs that would find their way across the airwaves this month. They included:

“Long Black Train” Josh Turner

“Two Black Cadillacs” Carrie Underwood

“(The Black Dress Song) Getting You Home” Chris Young

“Black Tears” Florida-Georgia Line

“Blue on Black” 5 Finger Death Punch ft. Brantley Gilbert

“Blacktop Gone” Jason Aldean

“Black” Dierks Bentley

“Where the Blacktop Ends” Keith Urban

“Black Jacket” Tim McGraw

Many of the comments below the post expressed concern that possibly the radio giants may be missing the point of Black History Month. “Couldn’t you just… you know… play some black artists?” asked Barry Summers. “Some of those were never even singles… it’s like you’re going as far out of your way as possible not to play Charley Crockett or Mickey Guyton,” replied Laverne Shirley. “How will a Jason Aldean song make anyone on earth think of Black people? This is sooo stupid.” said Terry Hogan.

While none of those complaints were addressed, Humes did add an additional comment. “No, we will not be playing Clint Black or Blackhawk songs because that’s old people music. Josh Turner is already pushing it.”

At press time, the media giants had also removed Johnny Cash’s “Man in Black” because of its age and also some complaints from listeners that the song was “lib’rul grooming.”

The Crud Report: December '22

Which Flag Do You Fly?

Brantley Gilbert Fan Career Starter Pack

The Crud Report: September 2022

 

Top 10 Things You Might See at a Five Finger Death Punch / Brantley Gilbert Concert

Five Finger Death Punch and Brantley Gilbert are going on tour. 

For real. Here are the top ten things you might see if you went.

10. Everybody mad dogging each other instead of watching the show

9. Many neckbeards, but few necks

8. Nobody singing along because somebody might call them gay for singing

7. Punisher tattoos

6. Roid gut

5. A camel clutch wrestling hold executed to perfection

4. 7 women, all working at concession stands

3. Really aggressive t-shirts with way too many words on them

2. Hundreds, maybe thousands, of fists bruised from punching walls

1. People in the 1% of worst music taste in America

Bonus thing: Several heartwarming reunions of cops and the people they arrested