Showing posts with label Little Known Facts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Little Known Facts. Show all posts

Dec 20, 2019

Little Known Facts: Christmas 2019 Edition

Sitting on Charlie Daniels’ lap and telling him what 
you want for Christmas really pisses him off. 

According to Santa’s Naughty and Nice List, Jason “Rowdy” Cope 
of The Steel Woods isn’t rowdy at all.

Shooter Jennings announced a spring tour and is looking forward to hitting the 
road to unwind after another winter of making toys for good boys and girls.

Blind Item: 30-50 feral hogs stole a popular Americana band’s van 
and gear trailer in certain southeastern Texas city.

Freezing temps across the country have caused Luke Bryan’s pants to fit better, 
but he is now battling chapped lips.

Mitchell Tenpenny is the first artist in a new country sub-genre: Incel Country.

With 2019 coming to an end I decided to check in with Colt Ford and 
his resolution to no longer suck. Failing for 50 weeks and counting.

The real issue is that there isn’t a war on “The Christmas Shoes.”

Kane Brown is beter then you’re favorite country sinjer. 
~this fact guest-written by a Kane Brown fan.

Florida Georgia Line’s FGL House features a reverse toy drive where employees 
go to hospitals and orphanages in Nashville and take take toys from the children.

Thomas Rhett cheerful story blah blah good news happy blah.

Starbucks compensated Jason Isbell for not changing his twitter name to IsBELLS this year by sending him a free nonfat, vanilla, soy latte with espresso shot once a week until March. (<—This fact requires too much referential minutia for the average person to get it, but I left it in so you can make fun of Jeremy for writing it. ~Trailer)

I went to see Luke Combs the other day. He said I needed wipers and a cabin air filter.

Gary Levox had a recent trip to the dentist because he confused 
the coal in his stocking for chocolate covered cherries.

Taylor Swift researched her role for Cats by being an actual crazy cat lady.

Most of these by Jeremy Harris - a few by Trailer

May 23, 2019

Little Known Facts Makes Its Glorious Return

Insane Clown Posse plans on releasing their entire catalog as country albums in 2019. There will be no changes or remixing done.

Shooter Jennings recently hit the big 4-0 which is a big deal since he was only 3 feet, 11 inches earlier in the year.

Due to him neglecting it while spending so much time on the road and at the beach, Kenny Chesney’s tractor is no longer considered sexy.

Zac Brown’s new rap song has reportedly coaxed hours of valuable information out of terrorists at Guantanamo Bay.

78% of all blacked out names in the Mueller Report were Steve Earle.

Famed Bigfoot hunter Eric Tipton has decided there isn’t enough challenge in looking for the elusive creature and now devotes his time to searching for women on the country music charts.

Jordan Davis’ beard is kind of like Samson’s hair in that it is hair on the head of someone who doesn’t sing country music. 

John Rich was one of the crowd favorites at a recent Nashville songwriting expo after he was a last minute substitution for the scheduled janitor that called in sick. 

Americana is sometimes called “country music for liberals” because much like liberalism, it proclaims gender equality but is mostly run by old white dudes. 

Constantly posting on Facebook about his weight loss vitamins is why John Anderson is the black sheep of his family. 

As a child, Russell Dickerson once got his head stuck in a toilet paper roll. 

I have never heard “Old Town Road” and will remove the genitalia of the first person that changes that.

Kane Brown coming on country radio is the equivalent of the auto flushing toilet pulling the paper seat cover down the drain before you are seated.


Most of these are by Jeremy Harris; a few are by Trailer.

Sep 14, 2018

Little Known Facts: September '18


By Jeremy Harris and Trailer

Before Cody Jinks was a country singer, he was in a metal band. Before he was in a metal band, he was the choreographer for Color Me Badd

Charlie Daniels has voted Green Party in the last 6 Presidential elections; He just pretends to be a hardcore Republican so as not to alienate his fans

Carrie Underwood became a vegetarian after seeing Blake Shelton eat a pork chop sandwich one time

Tyler Childers' carpet doesn't match the drapes

When Shooter Jennings gets angry, Misty has to tranquilize him lest he stomp his foot deeply into the floor and tear himself in two

Lin-Manuel Miranda is adapting a rap version of Pure Country for Broadway

Listening to Old Dominion’s “Written In The Sand” can be used against you in a court of law if you are accused of sexual misconduct

CMT will broadcast the Americana Honors and Awards November  28th, at 3:00 a.m. between a rerun of Full House and a Flex Seal infomercial 

Kelsea Ballerini gets so mad about Farce the Music's constant Barbie doll jokes that she kicks her little plastic dog across the glittery pink living room

There’s a 99% chance Lucero is better than your favorite band

Shooter Jennings came up with the idea for D.R.U.N.K. When he had trouble finding words to rhyme with Z.I.M.A.

Kane Brown fans actually have pretty low levels of meth addiction because "you never get high on your own supply"

Y’all should've been more specific when asking for more women on country radio because now we have Lindsay Ell

Tyler Childers is so good that Wheeler Walker Jr can introduce him and keep it PG

You can judge any album by how many tracks are “featuring” another artist

Turning on country radio and hearing Sam Hunt gives me the same feeling that Gary Levox gets when he takes a bite of ice cream and realizes it’s sugar free

Eric Church is on his way to your house right now to take all your AR-15's, teach your children about the 27 genders, and sign your wife up for the Communist party


May 9, 2018

Little Known Facts: May '18

In his teens, Jason Aldean was dropped by a vocal trainer who told Aldean's parents it was like trying to teach a legless man soccer

The greatest Lynyrd Skynyrd cover band is Lynyrd Skynyrd

The average Rascal Flatts fan is average

Evidently Bebe Rexha is not the subject of an early 90’s animated movie written by Reginald Hudlin

The bootleg Hank Jr. shirts on Facebook are sold by Hank Jr.

Cody Jinks, Whitey Morgan, and Ward Davis tour together so often so they can get the group discount at the beard groomer

Reba McEntire is the first Colonel Sanders to not have a cock, but only because she is allergic to feathers

Turns out, Blake Shelton is the jackass

The previous country fact was brought to you by The NFL Keurig Starbucks Yeti  Nordstrom Netflix Oreos Dick's Pepsi TJ Maxx  Lou's AR-15 n' Whiskey Shack

I was going to write the 500th fact that points out Shooter Jennings is short but I wanted to bring Farce the Music to new heights

Sam Hunt recently announced a winter 2018 Mexican tour starting on November 1, 2018

Blind item: Texas singer who recently signed with a major label uses full body pillows for his head

Early reports are that Chris Stapleton is the favorite to be named NBA Rookie of the Year

Support of a border wall by Congress has reached an all time high as long as it can be completed by November 2, 2018


Most of these by Jeremy Harris, but especially *that* one; you know the one. 

Dec 14, 2017

Little Known Facts: Christmas 2017 Edition

Little Known Facts: Christmas 2017 Edition
Little Known Facts: Christmas 2017 Edition
Little Known Facts: Christmas 2017 Edition

If Cole Swindell ran outside naked in a snowstorm, he'd be invisible

Luke Bryan never hangs his stockings by the fireplace because 
he’d feel silly wearing his garter belt without them

On the twelfth day of Christmas, Brantley Gilbert realized he couldn’t count that high

Neal McCoy's "Take a Knee, My Ass (I Won't Take a Knee)" was originally about 
Game of Thrones' Jon Snow and was titled "Bend the Knee, My Arse (I Shan't Bend the Knee)"

If Sturgill Simpson doesn’t do a Farce The Music 
interview we will start a rumor he punched Santa

There is a 100% chance Kenny Chesney will be a fan 
of this year's college football playoff champion

The previous fact will be recycled annually for eternity 

Justin Moore has lost 75% of his fame since Trailer stopped photoshopping him 
on shelves around Christmas  (Editor's note: or Scotty McCreery, whichever)

Sturgill Simpson recently punched Santa at a mall. More details to come. 

All pictures of Shooter Jennings on a shelf are not Photoshopped 

Gary Levox’s New Year’s resolution is to be less awkward in photos

The 2017 Time Magazine Person of the Year is every woman 
that has ever recorded ‘Baby it’s Cold Outside’

David Lee Murphy has a song on the country chart. No really, I’m serious about that one.

Asking for more women on country radio and getting Bebe Rexha is like 
asking for a Washington outsider to be president and getting... never mind 

Every time "Humble and Kind" plays on the radio, Spade Cooley rolls in his grave


All but 3 of these by Jeremy Harris

Aug 2, 2017

Little Known Facts Returns!

Sam Hunt celebrated his longest reigning Billboard Hot Country song of all time with a goblet of Perrier garnished with kiwi and a new pair of wide cropped trousers

Taylor Swift has been pondering a return to country music, but feels that the current scene is "too pop" for her

I wonder if mentioning that Upchurch guy or Luke Combs gets people to visit this site? Only one way to find out....

Bucky Covington is currently in the studio working on his new album*
*in the food truck grilling some brats

Former AC/DC frontman Brian Johnson is expected to release a country album in 2018 titled 'For Those About To Mud (We'll Drink a Cold One To That)'

Martina McBride once bet Reba a single's royalty payments she could kill a bottle of Rumple Minze in 30 seconds. That's how she paid for the indoor shooting range in her house.

Upon further investigation, Cody Jinks may be the devil

The Nashville zoo once went on lockdown due to a gorilla escape until they realized it was just Dylan Scott

Every 6-8 months I google 'Colt Ford' to make sure he's still alive so I can write facts about him and not seem like too much of an ass

Kyle Park is derivative, obsequious, facile, and parochial. For you Texas music fans, that means he's no different from mainstream country

Tyler Childers has become so famous that the Taco Bell in Louisa, Kentucky cleaned their bathroom in his honor

Kelsea Ballerini is as cute as a button and twice the singer

FTM was gonna start a @BedazzledLukeBryan Twitter account but all our planned posts just looked like Luke Bryan's

by Trailer and Jeremy Harris

Feb 22, 2017

Little Known Facts: Outlaw Country Cruise Edition

Little Known Facts: Outlaw Country Cruise Edition
AKA 'Rubbing It In Trailer's Face That He's Not Going'

By Jeremy Harris

While at sea, Donald Trump will sign an executive order preventing 
Steve Earle from reentering America. Steve won't mind.

Shooter Jennings will be late for at least one show because 
Jessi Colter will forget to sign him out of daycare.

The Band Perry are a late addition to the cruise. 
Luckily for them they all got the same shift in the kitchen.

There is a waiting list of seagulls that want to play 
in Chicken Shit Bingo with Dale Watson.

Crew members will have to move the Mojo Nixon swear jar 
to the center of the ship to prevent capsizing.

Nobody will wonder where Luke Bryan is. They also won't give a shit.

Brian Kendrick will not be on RAW on February 27th.

The cruise will last several additional days after 
Elizabeth Cook overtakes the captain.

When asked if he's bringing any produce aboard, 
Eddie Spaghetti will hope they mean vegetables.

Brantley Gilbert tried to get on the cruise but you have to 
have a bank account to purchase tickets.

Pirates around the world have warned each other not to mess with this cruise. 
Reason: Billy Joe Shaver

Dec 20, 2016

Little Known Facts: Christmas 2016 Edition

 Krampus is a mythical beast who punishes unruly children during the
Christmas season. Justin Moore has to show him ID every year

All Luke Bryan wants for Christmas is his two front testicles

Charlie Daniels recently sat down on a Nashville mall bench and a line of 
children looking for Santa suddenly formed in front of him

Santa added Dasher to his chili after he told Santa his favorite country singer was Sam Hunt

For Christmas this year, Miranda Lambert simply asks for peace, understanding, 
and "shut the f**k up about Blake Shelton every time I do a damn interview"

Gary Levox's ban from all central Ohio Golden Corral restaurants expires on January 1st 2017

Hank 3 will attempt to spend Christmas with his dad this year but it will end badly 
when he receives 'It's About Time' on cd as his gift

Golden Corral stock is a smart investment for 2017

Mattel is coming out with a new Holiday Country Barbie based on Kelsea Ballerini, 
but it just looks like a regular Barbie

Santa decided that anyone who puts anything Florida-Georgia Line on 
their Christmas list will receive a lump of coal and a Justin Wells cd instead

Since it's the time of sharing, I'm sharing the fact that Jason Aldean is 
an ass with everyone that will listen

Since Farce The Music didn't feature Scotty McCreery on a shelf this year, 
his sales dropped to only 1 album this winter

WWE wrestler Brian Kendrick requested December off to work as an elf at Macy's 
so Shooter Jennings has been filling in for him in the ring

Kenny Rogers is thankful for the cold weather because it gives him an excuse for the frozen face

Millions of children won't get their presents until December 26th due to Santa losing 
his sense of urgency after stopping at Willie Nelson's house


Mostly by Jeremy Harris

Jul 6, 2016

Little Known Facts: July 2016

Kane Brown is so country, he knows every word to "Dirt Road Anthem."

Shooter Jennings is the first night headliner for the 2016 Gathering of the Juggalos.

We Hate Pop Country has a secret stash of Rascal Flatts and Shania Twain CDs at their headquarters.

The phrase "Turd in the punch bowl" is being replaced by "Brantley at Willie's Picnic."

Kelsea Ballerini's next album will have more autobiographical songs, like 
"OMG Guys I'm Like So Drunk" and "Payola Princess."

Lee Greenwood's yearly relevance just peaked.

Cole Swindell is completely hairless.

Everyone that played Martina McBride's 'Independence Day' on Independence Day is an idiot.

Blake Shelton's middle name, Tollison, comes from the Anglo-Saxon term meaning "mailing it in."

When not busy with his own schedule, Pitbull tours as The Mavericks keyboard player.

Scott Borchetta has a tattoo of Baphomet on his inner thigh.

Most people don't know that Axl Rose replaced Chris Stapleton in The Steeldrivers.

Miranda Lambert's new music has been delayed because her record company didn't think radio 
would be comfortable with all the uses of "motherf***ker" and "son of a bitch."

Sam Hunt is just a regular guy who puts his 
wide-leg cropped trousers on one leg at a time like all of us.

Even though he was never entered, Gary Levox was the Las Vegas favorite 
to win the Nathan's hot dog eating competition.

This fakt haz bin ritten fonnetiklee so that FGL fanz kan reed it.

A group of Luke Bryan fans accidentally attended a Luke Bell show last week. 
They now think Luke Bryan sucks. 

By Trailer and Jeremy Harris

Apr 8, 2016

Little Known Facts: April '16

The average Kane Brown fan is 14, female and has horrible taste in music. 

Shooter Jennings decided to release Countach after 
it was rejected as the soundtrack to Pixels. 

Jason Aldean submitted his own fact to Farce but it was too racist to post. 

Dan + Shay were disappointed to recently discover that Five Guys was just a restaurant. 

Thanks to his performance in "I Saw The Light," Tom Hiddleston has been 
offered a position at the Hank Williams Museum, as a cashier. 

Wheeler Walker Jr had to miss the ACM Awards due to it being 
on a Sunday and interfering with him going to church. 

Jason Aldean's fact will be posted in the comments section 
of an upcoming We Hate Pop Country Facebook post. 

The iTunes deluxe version of the new Sturgill Simpson album 
contains a cover of the Teletubbies theme song. 

The 'K' in 'Known' keeps Florida Georgia Line fans from ever 
finding "facts" posted here about the duo. 

Posting anything related to Donald Trump causes higher than normal traffic to visit

Brantley Gilbert is Roman Reigns' favorite live act. 

Jason Isbell was the second choice for Brian Johnson's AC/DC replacement. 

One of the requirements to work at Farce The Music is a complete lack of shame. 
Donald Trump Donald Trump Donald Trump

All of these by Jeremy Harris

Feb 25, 2016

Little Known Facts: February 2016

By Jeremy Harris and Trailer


Jason Aldean is actually at the forefront of a new plastic surgery technique known as ballooning. 

Charlie Sheen was the first member of the Florida Georgia Line fan club. 

Taylor Swift wasn't made famous by Kanye West. She was made famous by Saving Country Music.

Recently, members of Sister Hazel were asked about switching to country music. 
They replied: "We didn't; country switched to Sister Hazel". 

Country music isn't evolving, but it is working on its resume for the Darwin Awards.

With the success of his debut album, Wheeler Walker, Jr. is hoping to make 
this his last year working as a kindergarten teacher's aid.

We'd like to proudly announce the Farce the Music Country Festival! 

Kendrick Lamar was offered one million dollars to re-edit his 2015 album 
"To Pimp A Butterfly" into a country album by Curb Records.

Tyler Farr is still on vocal rest because it takes a lot of rest
to sound like a rusty tractor driving through a plate glass window factory.

Toby Keith's I Love This Bar and Grill ain't as good as it once was, but it's restructuring.

"Kane Brown, who's she?" will be the most common reply to 
We Hate Pop Country Facebook posts in 2016.

The Farce the Music Country Festival has been cancelled. Sorry.

It is offensive to use the word "freedom" around a Brantley Gilbert fan. 
Instead, choose terms like "parole" or "weekend pass."

A confused elderly man was recently removed from a Ray Wylie Hubbard show. 
The show went on as scheduled once Ray was let back in. 

A CNN exit poll shows that 67% of Donald Trump voters 
hope he picks Earl Dibbles Jr as his running mate. 

Dec 15, 2015

Little Known Facts: Christmas 2015 Edition

This is a special extra long Jeremy & Trailer collaborative Christmas edition of Little Known Facts. Some artists get two facts...

John Rich celebrates the holidays by adding a couple ounces of eggnog to his mug of bourbon.

Colt Ford and Frosty The Snowman wear the same size pants. 

A Christmas Story is Gary Levox's favorite Christmas movie. 
He always cries during that emotional scene when the dogs eat the Christmas dinner.

Santa decided to skip the Levox house this year because someone always beat him to the cookies. 

Shooter Jennings doesn't wear red coats during December
because someone always tries to put him on a shelf.

Shooter Jennings had to delay his upcoming album "Countach (for Giorgio)"
until next year to allow him to spend more time working in Santa's workshop. 

With his new contract Chad Brock is experiencing a resurgence of popularity
but unfortunately some of the children pee on his lap while giving their wish list. 

Every year around this time Farce The Music is overwhelmed with emails asking to post Scotty McCreery
on a shelf pics. 99% of those come from addresses ending with 

All Luke Bryan wants for Christmas is his two front ...testicles.

Santa will have a reindeer shit on the floor of anyone that posted #WhoIsChrisStapleton in 2015. 

Jason Aldean only watches the first 20 minutes of How the Grinch Stole Christmas.

Instead of receiving coal in their stockings this year, badly-behaved
country singers will be forced to share a dressing room with Mojo Nixon. 

73% of Brantley Gilbert fans are more concerned with making
 the warden's nice list than they are with Santa Claus' list. 

Old Dominion hopes they get switches for Christmas, because they're perverts.

Bucky Covington is hoping the mild weather continues throughout Christmas. He says it sucks
when your spray bottle of water freezes while cleaning windshields at a Nashville red light. 

Country singer Sam Hunt celebrates Christmas by dressing in outlandish costumes
and knocking on neighbors' doors asking for candy.

Frankie Ballard decorates his home for Christmas with… wait, who the hell is Frankie Ballard?!?

The only item on Martin Shkreli's Christmas list is a Kane Brown album. 

Christmas is a special time of year that can bring a smile to anyone's face. 
Except Kenny Rogers anytime after 2011. 

Bucky Covington always gets kicked out of the record label's Christmas party 
for being too drunk and because he doesn't work there.

Oct 27, 2015

Little Known Facts: Halloween Edition

Shooter Jennings recently found his He-Man costume from 3rd grade and 
decided to wear it this year since it still fits. 

Colt Ford scrapped plans to go as someone less talented than himself when 
he couldn't find a Big Smo outfit. 

After being up late with a cranky baby, Jason Isbell will accidentally put on 
Amanda Shires' pants on the 31st and walk out dressed as Sam Hunt. 

Somewhere in Georgia a hay-wagon hitch will break and nearly cancel the hayride 
but all will be saved by Brantley Gilbert's wallet chain. 

Hunter Hayes has been spotted at Sam's Club buying gallon tubs of vaseline to 
grease his face up because just a fat suit isn't enough to look like Gary Levox. 

In 2012 Hank Williams Jr dressed as Chewbacca but everyone knew it was him 
because he was constantly yelling "I'm Hank Williams Jr, bitch!."

On October 31st Dale Watson will wake up and dress like a badass. Just like every other day. 

This year Chad Brock will be dressed as a homeless man on the streets of Nashville. 
He will remain in costume through 2018. 

Florida Georgia Line decided to not dress as what they believe to be the greatest country duo 
of all time because they couldn't decide which one had to be Big Kenny. 

Tyler Farr will be arrested on Halloween for parking a hearse outside 
a neighbor kid's bedroom and throwing popcorn balls at the window. 

After a bad experience with Wynonna's spray tan artist Dolly Parton will be stopped at 
the local farmers market for being suspected of smuggling two pumpkins out the door. 

Chris Stapleton's costume will not be seen by most of the country but 
people that actually know things will agree it's the best costume this year. 

Ray Wylie Hubbard will dress as a geriatric Danny Zuko. The other 364 days of the year
this is referred to as "the Ray Wylie Hubbard look."

By Jeremy Harris

Sep 30, 2015

Little Known Facts: September 2015

Kenny Rogers recently announced his retirement from singing, 
five years after the last time he moved his mouth. 

A 2012 FCC ruling requires all FM stations that broadcast mostly traditional sounding 
country music be placed on a frequency that ends in an even number.

Paparazzi recently caught Jason Aldean in a public restroom 
with his jeans pulled down, attempting to unwad his panties.

In 2014 Gary Levox donated his belly button lint to Eskimos in upper 
Alaska to make new clothes for the village's children.

When classmates at the 10-year high school reunion would ask hick-hop artist Lenny Cooper 
what he does for a living, he'd tell them "foot fetish porn actor" to avoid embarrassment. 

When classmates at the 10-year high school reunion asked Bucky Covington what he does for a living,
he said "I sing with my cover band at high school reunions like this; I didn't actually graduate."

Tyler Hubbard's favorite instrument is GarageBand on a MacBook Air. 

Luke Bryan was late for his newest music video shoot consisting of pretty girls in lifted trucks
due to his Volkswagen having a flat tire on the way to pick up his skinny jeans from the tailor. 

Ryan Adams made his choice of which album to cover by drawing a name from a hat. 
Besides Taylor's 1989, the other options were Chad Brock's Yes!
2 Live Crew's Back at Your Ass for the Nine-4, and Trixter 's self-titled debut.

Taylor Swift was so excited when someone told her Ryan Adams 
was covering her album, she Googled his name immediately.

Sam Hunt is so tired of people asking why he considers himself country, 
he's just had t-shirts with "$$$" printed on them to point at during interviews.

If Jason Isbell got a free beer for every time somebody asked about 
his sobriety in an interview, he could… wait, that's just not appropriate.

Shooter Jennings' next release will be a folk album about hard times in the digital era 
entitled Hey Brother, Can You Spare a Bitcoin?

If you stare into a mirror and yell "Yee Yee" three times, 
a drunk skank with a 'Merica tube top will appear and give you a handy.

Thomas Rhett recently had keyless entry installed in his home because he can never find the key. 

A Trailer & Jeremy Harris Collaborative Effort

Aug 5, 2015

Little Known Facts: August 2015

Def Leppard will be reissuing their entire catalog and sending all singles to country radio.
No remastering or editing will be performed.

Chase Rice has a punch card for the health department: collect 11 std's, get the 12th visit free.

I recently asked Ray Wylie Hubbard how it felt to be the second most successful Hubbard
in country music after Tyler. I wrote these facts while recovering in the hospital.

According to a recent interview with Steven Tyler's two biggest 
pet peeves are: 1. People saying his country single sucks. 2. Online petitions asking him to
turn in his 1976 decathlon gold metal.

Bill Cosby knows every Tyler Farr song by heart.

With their upcoming album, The Damn Quails hope to surpass Texas rapper Lyndon U. MyJohnson 
as the most successful musical act to name themselves after a vice president's name.
 *editor's note: Yes, I know…

Blake Shelton filed for divorce after hearing that Ol' Red had began to play the field.

Elizabeth Cook once knocked Ronda Rousey out in a bar fight.

Shooter Jennings was nearly killed while playing in a McDonald's playland ball-pit
when Gary Levox confused him for an abandoned Chicken McNugget.

Jason Isbell was the only artist on the Billboard country top ten that had
heard of all the artists in the top ten last week.

When you play a Sam Hunt song backwards it's still not country.

Bucky Covington was recently fired from Apple as the person typing
your message when you use speak to text on an iPhone.

92% of these written by Jeremy Harris

Apr 1, 2015

Little Known Facts: April 2015

 Jason Aldean's wedding party featured a who's who of Nashville scum and American Idol rejects.

The truth behind the breakup of Fifth on the Floor is that bass player Jason Parsons 
is a finalist for the possible upcoming mission to Mars.

Chase Rice's next album will have more Elegance, Dignity, and Majesty. 
Those are his favorite Crazy Horse strippers, and they will be providing backing vocals.

The Grand Ole Opry recently invited Sam Hunt to perform but he declined because he had never heard of the venue.

Indiana's new religious freedom act was originally designed to keep out Little Big Town, 
but a typo created discrimination against the LGBT community.

Florida-Georgia Line follows Farce The Music on Twitter due to the frequent mentions
they receive on the account. If they add a third member who can read, they will block us.

Chase Bryant ended the crowd surfing portion of his set after the February incident 
in which he put out a fan's eye with his hair.

Marilyn Manson ended his relationship with Evan Rachel Wood upon 
discovering it was actually Shooter Jennings in drag.

Luke Bryan's stage clothes all come from Once Upon A Child.

Brantley Gilbert finally had a test come back with nothing on it. 
Unfortunately for him, it was for his GED.

Confusing RaeLynn and Raelyn Nelson in front of Willie Nelson is the quickest way 
to see The Redheaded Stranger's black belt skills.

After Keith Urban wore a Sturgill Simpson shirt on American Idol, 
Sturgill returned the favor by eating some Australian mushrooms in private.

Almost all of these by Jeremy Harris

Nov 12, 2014

Little Known Facts: November '14

 Taylor Swift actually pulled her music from Spotify because they 
refused to deliver her royalty payments in gold bullion.

After reading the bio for Florida Georgia Line, 
Ray Wylie Hubbard has decided to drop his last name.

Luke Bryan celebrated his CMA Entertainer of the Year victory by drinking 
Smirnoff Ice from his John Denver tumbler, wearing a Ronnie Milsap t-shirt.

Sam Hunt is so country, the first song he remembers loving 
is "Cotton-Eyed Joe" (the Rednex dance remix).

While Kacey Musgraves may be the most recent, Conway Twitty will always 
be known as the first panty dropper to perform with Loretta Lynn.

Thanks to the rising popularity of Brantley Gilbert, the name 'Brantley' 
has risen to number one on the list of misspelled baby names for 2014.

Sturgill Simpson doesn't have to do hard drugs anymore. 
He already did so many that they're still in his system.

Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel decided to cancel an upcoming Keith Urban concert at U.S. 
Cellular Field because of concerns of violence giving the city's south side a bad reputation.

Kimberly from Little Big Town gets her hair done at 
Kristine's Pet Grooming before every awards show.

When Shooter Jennings visits Hattie B's Hot Chicken in Nashville, 
they always bring him the usual: a booster seat.

Wynonna Judd recently settled out of court on a copyright 
infringement lawsuit case against Tan Mom.

Jason Aldean has legally committed to an upcoming tour with Kenny Chesney 
but is secretly considering a tour with a younger, skankier artist.

Toby Keith's tour rider calls for a case of Budweiser and a cold cuts tray. 
Miranda Lambert's requires bottled water, a veggie tray and soft towels. 
Chase Rice's calls for 6 Four Lokos and a stripper.

By Trailer & Jeremy Harris

Sep 11, 2014

Little Known Facts: September '14

Lefty Frizzell was ambidextrous.

Creed's Scott Stapp considered making a country album but decided
against it because "the scene is just too douchey right now."

For every number 1 single Rascal Flatts has Gary Levox
celebrates by literally adding a notch to his belt.

Due to his reputation for making subpar music Chris Gaines decided
to make his comeback under the stage name Garth Brooks.

Justin Moore started singing country music after his "little luchador"
career ended with a mis-timed hurricanrana.

Thanks to quick actions from a bystander who applied pressure to the wound,
the man Johnny Cash shot in Reno lived until 2007.

Taylor Swift says she hasn't dated in over a year, so her next album
will be entirely about collecting cats and eating Blue Bell by the quart.

Little Big Town is a bad good band.

Each year, Lee Greenwood goes into hibernation
from November 12 through the last Sunday in May.

Sam Hunt is so country, he once got barbecue sauce on his vintage mesh yellow polo.

Jason Brown changed his name to Colt Ford to avoid being confused with his younger brother Chris Brown.

Despite FTM's constant jokes, Brantley Gilbert has only tried meth once and he didn't like it.
(Then he tried it 64 more times and didn't like it any of those times either.)

On the grounds of Toby Keith's Norman, OK farm/estate, there is a life-sized bronze statue of Toby Keith.

By Trailer and Jeremy Harris

Jul 3, 2014

Little Known Facts: July '14

By Trailer and Jeremy Harris

If you don't use American made fireworks to celebrate Independence Day, 
Toby Keith will come to your house and put a boot up your ass.

Chase Rice's college football career was cut short due to an injury sustained in a tragic keg stand mishap.

Scott Borchetta doesn't mind if you question his business decisions and ethics, 
but if you say one word about his perm he will end you.

The average Luke Bryan fan can type 49 werds per minute.

Jerrod Niemann wants you to know that it was his record label's idea to release "Donkey." 
In fact, he didn't even want it on the album. In fact, that's not even him singing on the track. 
Seriously, guys.

Colt Ford is a really nice guy until you remind him that his music completely sucks ass.

Tim McGraw wants you to know that it was his record label's idea to release "Lookin' for That Girl." In fact…

Justin Moore only drinks top shelf liquor, unless he's alone and can't reach it.

Martina McBride stopped doing festival dates with bro-country acts 
because their fans would all wave American flags during "Independence Day."

In a recent competition to find country music's best looking beard, 
Whitey Morgan came in second behind Miranda Lambert.

Kenny Chesney once broke up a clothes-ripping brawl between Faith Hill and Shania Twain 
backstage at the CMAs. Said Ronnie Dunn, who witnessed the whole thing, "Chesney's a dumbass."

New country artist Walker Chase Blake hopes to stand out from the crowd with his new rap-tinged
single "Blah blah something about kisses at night or whatever."

Johnny Cash had an amazing collection of 19th century guns and antique books. 
Brantley Gilbert has a pretty sweet collection of glass pipes and Juggs magazines.

Jun 4, 2014

Little Known Facts: June '14

Brantley Gilbert says the greatest inspirations for his vocal style are
Christian Bale's Batman, 60-grit sandpaper, and hemorrhoids.

Despite his religion-questioning and open-minded lyrics, Sturgill Simpson actually
attends Larry Lee the Primitive Baptist's church several times a year.

Webster's dictionary defines a one-man-band as an individual that can not
properly do one of the four things needed to be an entertainer well, so they do five things at once.

A Tijuana Mexico newspaper recently named Jerrod Niemann
"public enemy number one" due to his single "Donkey" giving donkeys a bad name.

The same night that Luke Bryan fell off the stage,
Tim McGraw fell through an air conditioner vent on stage.

The Devil has reported a 99% increase in music battle victories
in the state of Georgia over the last three years.

Randy Houser did'nt approve of this fact but he did proofread it.

Rolling Stone Country recently interviewed Tom Arnold and asked him
who his favorite country singer was. He replied "Nobody is
better than Sturgill Simpson but I can most relate with Blake Shelton."

Carrie Underwood and Miranda Lambert's "Something Bad" was originally
the winner of a "Write a Song Even Aerosmith Wouldn't Cut" contest in 1998.

'We Hate Pop Country' did not write this fact, but they may adapt it into a meme in the future.

Chad Kroeger of Nickleback currently has pending lawsuits against twelve
of the top 25 artists on the Billboard country charts for copyright infringement.

In a recent interview Shooter Jennings stated that he has always looked up to Little Jimmy Dickens.

In 2009 Tyler Farr caught laryngitis. He still has it.

Brantley Gilbert also caught something that year.

Most of these by Jeremy Harris.


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