Showing posts with label Fireball. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fireball. Show all posts
Aug 26, 2019
Jul 5, 2019
"Always Stay Sexy, Fireball" A Computer Generated Bro-Country Song
Always Stay Sexy, Fireball
I grew up overshadowed by smelly bonfire
Couldn't catch the eye of no city girl
Here I am devoted to Fireball
How I love the way you look in your pink jeans
Can't believe I let the smog cloud my eye
Where the smelly bonfire stand
And the hot hay surround
I'll ride my horny truck with you by my side
There's a whisper in the pasture breeze
Reminding me of thot
That whisper builds
That whisper cries
Thot in the morning skies
You appear on the horizon
Brushing that wet hair from your eyes
The city folk with their fancy gadgets
Cement bonfire like grey tombs
Don't have nothin' on our way of life
Just listen to the hollering
Don't live your life like a city boy
Today might feel a time to be like a city boy
But that ain't no way to lead a life
You know, there's a lot I drive by in my horny truck
Folk who is messing up
Always stay sexy, Fireball
Always stay sexy
In pasture, when I was a child
I met a sexy man
"How can you be so sexy?" asked I
Here was his wise reply
Don't live your life like a city boy
Today might feel a time to be like a city boy
But that ain't no way to lead a life
Met an old lady who lived like a city boy
"What happened to her?" asked I
Here was his wise reprise
Don't live your life like a city boy
Today might feel a time to be like a city boy
But that ain't no way to lead a life
That lady's gone now
It's sad really
Word is, she had wet hair once
Little Fireball, keep your jeans pink
Always stay sexy, Fireball
Always stay sexy
Hollering, hollering, hollering
Hollering, hollering, hollering...
Feb 19, 2019
Dec 13, 2016
Rockin' Around in Skinny Jeans
(I wrote a whole Christmas song parody around @fiveoletsgo 's title.)
Rocking Around in Skinny Jeans
(FTM Lyrical Satirical)
Rocking around in skinny jeans
at the Christmas party, brah
Some mistletoe hung where chicks can see
It's hanging above my crotch
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Makes the chain on my wallet ring
Later we'll do some body shots
and auto-tuned caroling
You will feel just like a Yuletime baller
You will feel just like a Yuletime baller
When you hear, voices holler
"Let's be merry; Pour me some Goose and cranberry"
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Have a lit ol' holiday
Everyone stumble drunkenly
Round a bonfire of stolen crates
You will feel a little something something
You will feel a little something something
When you see fists are pumping
"Crank some Future; pour a line of Fireball shooters"
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Rocking around in skinny jeans
Now it's time to spit some game
Take this ho ho ho dancing merrily
To my jacked up Christmas sleigh
Nov 2, 2015
Sep 25, 2015
Sep 10, 2015
Friends in Bro Places
There was talk last week of Garth Brooks re-recording his signature hit "Friends in Low Places" with George Strait, Keith Urban, Jason Aldean, and …Florida-Georgia Line. It looks like that's not going to happen now, due to some legal issues, but we like to think if it had happened, the lyrics would have been updated thusly…
"Friends In Bro Places"
(A parody of "Friends in Low Places")
Blame it all on my squad
We showed up real hard
In wife beaters and gelled up hair
We letting folks know
That we down to throw
If you trippin' son
We ain't fightin' fair
And I got so turnt up
So I raised up my cup
When the DJ played some old Drake
And I grinded you
Baby, that's when I knew
I'd hit dat in my Chevrolet
I got friends in bro places
where the Fireball burns
and the sugar's shakin' like oh yay yay
Yeah drop it that way
Got less friends than I got haters
Cause I wave bills with big faces
Oh, I got friends in bro places
Crank the truck and get gone
Yeah my game so strong
Back roads what we're headed for
Crack a Miller Lite
And we're getting tight
Find a field and it's time to score
Hey girl I don't care
There's folks everywhere
It's just where my homies throw down
Nobody will mind
But if you're a shouter
Then they might gather round
I got friends in bro places
where the Fireball burns
and the sugar's shakin' like oh yay yay
Yeah drop it that way
Got less friends than I got haters
I might be just a little racist
Oh, I got friends in bro places
[3rd Verse:]
We're getting it on
To a Kanye song
Yeah man, you know how I do
When some city boys pull up
They're acting real tough
Mad doggin' while I'm tryna screw
I always mean to cause a big scene
Just wait 'til I'm done with this lass
Then son you can bet
You'll pay back that debt
Cause I'm a whoop your ass
"Friends In Bro Places"
(A parody of "Friends in Low Places")
Blame it all on my squad
We showed up real hard
In wife beaters and gelled up hair
We letting folks know
That we down to throw
If you trippin' son
We ain't fightin' fair
And I got so turnt up
So I raised up my cup
When the DJ played some old Drake
And I grinded you
Baby, that's when I knew
I'd hit dat in my Chevrolet
I got friends in bro places
where the Fireball burns
and the sugar's shakin' like oh yay yay
Yeah drop it that way
Got less friends than I got haters
Cause I wave bills with big faces
Oh, I got friends in bro places
Crank the truck and get gone
Yeah my game so strong
Back roads what we're headed for
Crack a Miller Lite
And we're getting tight
Find a field and it's time to score
Hey girl I don't care
There's folks everywhere
It's just where my homies throw down
Nobody will mind
But if you're a shouter
Then they might gather round
I got friends in bro places
where the Fireball burns
and the sugar's shakin' like oh yay yay
Yeah drop it that way
Got less friends than I got haters
I might be just a little racist
Oh, I got friends in bro places
[3rd Verse:]
We're getting it on
To a Kanye song
Yeah man, you know how I do
When some city boys pull up
They're acting real tough
Mad doggin' while I'm tryna screw
I always mean to cause a big scene
Just wait 'til I'm done with this lass
Then son you can bet
You'll pay back that debt
Cause I'm a whoop your ass
Mar 24, 2015
Mar 5, 2015
Oct 31, 2014
Oct 20, 2014
Oct 16, 2014
Sep 26, 2014
Barbed Wire Tattoo (A Bro-Country Ballad)
Barbed Wire Tattoo - A Bro-Country Ballad
(©2014 FTM Satire)
I tried to send you a shot of my junk
But I guess you're blocking my cell
Somebody said you're with that new punk
That smart dude what talks real well
I know we broke up a few weeks ago
And I'm not supposed to come near
But I've been circling your block real slow
Cinnamon whiskey mixin' with tears
(©2014 FTM Satire)
I tried to send you a shot of my junk
But I guess you're blocking my cell
Somebody said you're with that new punk
That smart dude what talks real well
I know we broke up a few weeks ago
And I'm not supposed to come near
But I've been circling your block real slow
Cinnamon whiskey mixin' with tears
Chorus
How much Fireball is it gonna take to get you off my mind?
How'm I gonna keep this full-size jacked-up truck between the lines?
Now your fine ass goes riding in some college boy's Isuzu
And I gotta cover up your name in this barbed wire tattoo
I tried to hook up with your friend Emily
She can really make that thang shake
But every kiss tasted like your memory
So I made her get off my tailgate
I know you said that I'm a real douche
From my chrome to my Axe Body Spray
But the thought of that nerd screwing you
Makes me want to punch him in the face
How much Fireball is it gonna take to get you off my mind?
How'm I gonna keep this chromed-out Chevy truck between the lines?
Now your fine ass goes riding in some sissy boy's Isuzu
And I gotta cover up your name in this barbed wire tattoo
Bridge
Saw you and him at the stoplight
He was reaching for your hand to hold
Thought about getting out to fight
But I hit the gas and rolled coal
How much Fireball is it gonna take to get you off my mind?
How'm I gonna keep this full-size jacked-up truck between the lines?
Now your fine ass goes riding in some college boy's Isuzu
And I gotta cover up your name in this barbed wire tattoo
Tag
I tried to send you a shot of my junk
How much Fireball is it gonna take to get you off my mind?
How'm I gonna keep this full-size jacked-up truck between the lines?
Now your fine ass goes riding in some college boy's Isuzu
And I gotta cover up your name in this barbed wire tattoo
I tried to hook up with your friend Emily
She can really make that thang shake
But every kiss tasted like your memory
So I made her get off my tailgate
I know you said that I'm a real douche
From my chrome to my Axe Body Spray
But the thought of that nerd screwing you
Makes me want to punch him in the face
How much Fireball is it gonna take to get you off my mind?
How'm I gonna keep this chromed-out Chevy truck between the lines?
Now your fine ass goes riding in some sissy boy's Isuzu
And I gotta cover up your name in this barbed wire tattoo
Bridge
Saw you and him at the stoplight
He was reaching for your hand to hold
Thought about getting out to fight
But I hit the gas and rolled coal
How much Fireball is it gonna take to get you off my mind?
How'm I gonna keep this full-size jacked-up truck between the lines?
Now your fine ass goes riding in some college boy's Isuzu
And I gotta cover up your name in this barbed wire tattoo
Tag
I tried to send you a shot of my junk
May 8, 2014
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