Showing posts with label Joe Diffie. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Joe Diffie. Show all posts
Mar 27, 2013
Country Day March '13 Part 3: Chuck Wicks, Josh Grider, etc.
Feb 26, 2013
OMG Reviews: Jason Aldean - 1994
by Brittany Fant, 15-year-old reviewer
Listen here!
MMYYYY FAVORITTTTTEEEE! Jason is such a good rapper! This song is about the year my parents got married! So cool. I bet they didn't even have awesome country rap songs back then. They were missing out! I'm actually so glad I wasn't even a twinkle in my folks' eyes back then. It was so lame. Their cell phones were like the size of a brick and you couldn't even text on them!!! No internet. And HUNTER HAYES hadn't learned to play guitar yet! What a crappy time to be alive, lol!! But at least this song about that year is so good. All you geezers complaining and saying stuff like "country + rap = crap" need to get a life. All us people who actually buy music on iTunes are voting y'all off the island, lol. Old people, we grew up with awesome bands like Linkin Park and Limp Biscuit so we know good music and we want country to sound young and cool! Jason is kind of old to be rapping, but not as old as Jay-Z so I guess it's okay. At least he's awesome at it. Now, about the song's subject matter. Joe Diffie? I don't know who that is, but his name is fun to say. I Googled him and he had some awful hair!! That's another thing about the old days. They let anybody sing on the radio! They didn't have to be hot or anything. I'm glad that's all changed now!!!! Nowadays, guys care about their hygiene and their abs, thank goodness. I clicked on a couple of Joe Diffie's songs and couldn't get through more than a few seconds. He sings like a hick! I guess it's cool for Jason to get people interested in that guy a little... maybe sell a few mp3's for him (hopefully his record company set it up for him - lol, he's probably too old to know how to use email). Maybe Joe will be able to afford a decent haircut now. At least his name is fun to yell over and over! I love that! Maybe the "Joe Diffie" will take over the Harlem Shake as the cool YouTube dance! I hope Hunter has some rap songs on his new album. He probably has better flow than 2Pac! This is the best time to be alive because music is so awesome. If you don't like "1994," you need to get out your 8-tracks of Waylon Jenkins or something and eat your pistachio pudding. It's never going back the way you want it, gramps.
5 Heart Hands!
Labels:
hick-hop,
Jason Aldean,
Joe Diffie,
OMG Reviews
Feb 21, 2013
Little Known Facts: Feb. '13
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Re-entry to a Brantley Gilbert concert is only allowed if you've had your lower back stamped.
When traveling to Scotty McCreery's house you must travel over a bridge,
but only after correctly answering Scotty's riddle.
Joe Diffie has spent all of his career earnings attempting to build a time machine
to prevent himself from starting the truck song craze.
Your mom likes that one Luke Bryan song.
The band Fifth On The Floor was first discovered when Shooter Jennings
climbed a bean stalk that led to the home of lead singer Justin Wells.
If golf celebrated mediocrity as much as country radio, Colt Ford would still be a golfer.
Everything on Justin Moore's tourbus is miniaturized for his ease of use.
eBay item #170992608018 is for the rights to roll Willie Nelson up and smoke him when he dies.
Jason Aldean DOES NOT have herpes. Word on the street however is that he has a few sores
that pop up once a month on his genitalia but he DOES NOT have herpes.
Long brown hooded robes and torches are required work apparel at
Big Machine Records except on Satanic Fridays.
1990's country star Ty Herndon now lives in a monastery in the Swiss Alps.
-----------------------------------------------------------
*Most of this, including the shot of Justin Wells and Shooter Jennings, by Jeremy Harris.
Feb 20, 2013
New Jason Aldean Single Cover Revealed
Labels:
Jason Aldean,
Joe Diffie,
Photocrap
Oct 24, 2012
Country Day October '12 Part 3: Parody Album Covers
Labels:
Chad Brock,
Country Day,
Joe Diffie,
Mitt Romney,
Photocrap,
Trace Adkins
Aug 17, 2012
The Peach Pickers say...
Labels:
Jason Aldean,
Joe Diffie,
memes,
The Peach Pickers,
Thomas Rhett
Aug 16, 2012
I Should Sell These
...just to spite Thomas Rhett and Jason Aldean. I probably would if it wasn't illegal to use Joe's image without going through the proper legal channels. I'd wear it too, if it wasn't based on a country-rap song soon to be made famous by a wallet-chain clad d-bag.
Labels:
Jason Aldean,
Joe Diffie,
Photocrap,
Thomas Rhett
Oct 4, 2011
Dec 20, 2010
Aug 9, 2009
Joe Diffie Parody
Here's a funny parody from new contributor Bobby Joe!
Note from BJ: Apologies to Kerry Kurt Phillips and Howard Perdew, writers of the fine hit by Joe Diffie, "Pickup Man."
Stickup Man
(©2009 BobbyJoe parody lyric)
Well, I got my first Glock when I was ten
Robbed a lemonade stand with a friend
Hauled booty and ran and thought twice before
I robbed a golden-tooth pimp and his fav'rite whore
She tried to bribe me with a flash and he said, "Dude, understand
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man"
When I turned sixteen, I jacked a car for a thrill
My first ride was a Coup Deville
I was cruisin' the town and the first freak I seen
Was Juicy Jo Johnson, the neighborhood queen
He flagged me down with his polished nail hands, and said
"I never knew you were a stickup man"
(Chorus):
You ought to hear it fire, man, it makes them run
I wouldn't even trade it for an Uzi gun
It's got a ten-round clip that's always easy to change
You know, if it weren't for cops, I'd always get my way
I spend my time out on the lam
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man
Most Friday nights, I can be found
Chasin' freaky young things down at Lee Roy's Lounge
While out on the street, my ol' homeboy Son
Well, he's casing joints for a midnight run
I always got my radio tuned to po-lice band
'Cause there's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man
(Chorus):
You ought to hear it fire, man, it makes them run
I wouldn't even trade it for an Uzi gun
It's got a ten-round clip that's always easy to change
You know, if it weren't for cops, I'd always get my way
I spend my time out on the lam
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man
(Bridge):
A job with low pay or a rapper's bling dreams
One squeeze of my Glock and you'll know what I mean
(Chorus):
You ought to hear it fire, man, it makes them run
I wouldn't even trade it for an Uzi gun
It's got a ten-round clip that's always easy to change
You know, if it weren't for cops, I'd always get my way
I spend my time out on the lam
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man
Yeah, there's something po-lice hate about a stickup man
Stickup Man
(©2009 BobbyJoe parody lyric)
Well, I got my first Glock when I was ten
Robbed a lemonade stand with a friend
Hauled booty and ran and thought twice before
I robbed a golden-tooth pimp and his fav'rite whore
She tried to bribe me with a flash and he said, "Dude, understand
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man"
When I turned sixteen, I jacked a car for a thrill
My first ride was a Coup Deville
I was cruisin' the town and the first freak I seen
Was Juicy Jo Johnson, the neighborhood queen
He flagged me down with his polished nail hands, and said
"I never knew you were a stickup man"
(Chorus):
You ought to hear it fire, man, it makes them run
I wouldn't even trade it for an Uzi gun
It's got a ten-round clip that's always easy to change
You know, if it weren't for cops, I'd always get my way
I spend my time out on the lam
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man
Most Friday nights, I can be found
Chasin' freaky young things down at Lee Roy's Lounge
While out on the street, my ol' homeboy Son
Well, he's casing joints for a midnight run
I always got my radio tuned to po-lice band
'Cause there's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man
(Chorus):
You ought to hear it fire, man, it makes them run
I wouldn't even trade it for an Uzi gun
It's got a ten-round clip that's always easy to change
You know, if it weren't for cops, I'd always get my way
I spend my time out on the lam
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man
(Bridge):
A job with low pay or a rapper's bling dreams
One squeeze of my Glock and you'll know what I mean
(Chorus):
You ought to hear it fire, man, it makes them run
I wouldn't even trade it for an Uzi gun
It's got a ten-round clip that's always easy to change
You know, if it weren't for cops, I'd always get my way
I spend my time out on the lam
There's just something po-lice hate about a stickup man
Yeah, there's something po-lice hate about a stickup man
Labels:
Joe Diffie,
parody
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