Showing posts with label David Allan Coe. Show all posts
Showing posts with label David Allan Coe. Show all posts
Apr 28, 2023
David Allan Coe Requests Your Man Card
Labels:
David Allan Coe,
Man card,
memes,
Satire
Apr 24, 2023
Monday Morning Memes: David Allan Coe, George Strait, Morgan Wallen
Feb 22, 2023
Feb 17, 2023
“Tennessee Whiskey” Ends Waffle House Brawl in Singalong
Fights at Waffle House are nothing new. Every week it seems, there is another video of some unruly drunk getting his comeuppance at the hands of a grizzled grillmaster, or customers duking it out over minor slights. The skirmishes usually end in arrests, injuries, or hurt pride, but a recent all out brawl at a Southaven, MS restaurant had a more uplifting finale.
What began as a verbal altercation between some Ole Miss fraternity guys and a couple of truckers quickly spun out of control. One of the cooks, Lucius Perkins – fresh out of Parchman, came over to mediate the discussion but ended up taking an errant punch meant for one of the frat boys. Within seconds, Perkins had the trucker in a full nelson and was inching him toward the exit when the other trucker smashed Lucius over the head with a napkin dispenser.
All hell broke loose and soon, nearly everyone in the restaurant was throwing punches, chairs, and hashbrowns. One man suffered a power bomb onto a table, another woman’s wig was ripped off and thrown onto the grill; it was chaos.
Lucius, confused and staggering from a minor concussion, knew he had to get the situation under control because he wasn’t going back to prison. A light bulb went on in his head and he headed for the jukebox.
He swiftly turned the volume up and made his selection. Mr. Perkins waited and watched. As the dulcet tones of Chris Stapleton’s “Tennessee Whiskey” began to play over the din of moving furniture, punches, and slurs, he noticed a change. Suddenly, one of the truckers released his headlock on one of the frat guys. Another slap fight quickly crapped out as the slappers turned their reddened faces toward the jukebox. Bloodied men and disheveled women, black, white, Latino, and Asian, laid down their fists and chairs in stunned silence.
By the first chorus, the rumble was finished. Ketchup dripped from the light fixtures, the bathroom door was ripped off the hinges, the cash register was in the parking lot, but the combatants were at peace. And then it began. “Youuu’re as smooooooth as Tennessee whiskey…” came the voice of a woman from the window row. It was a keening, unpleasant performance, but it didn’t matter… people joined in. Soon, the Sigma Chi’s were arm in arm swaying with the tattooed Uber driver from Germantown and the truckers were hugging Mr. Perkins, and everyone was singing at the top of their lungs.
By the end of the song, apologies were made and the cleanup began. “Nobody even called the cops,” said Perkins. “This was so beautiful we didn’t wanna mess it up, man I was just crying, humanity can be good sometimes. And thank you, Chris Stapleton. You helped me break my cycle of recidivism. F**k 12.”
The cashier, Cheryl Fontaine, told us that nearly every single person helped clean up and some of them were even friends afterward. “Except that boomer over in the corner,” she pointed. “He keeps saying we’re all frauds because it’s not Coe or Jones’ version. Whatever.”
What began as a verbal altercation between some Ole Miss fraternity guys and a couple of truckers quickly spun out of control. One of the cooks, Lucius Perkins – fresh out of Parchman, came over to mediate the discussion but ended up taking an errant punch meant for one of the frat boys. Within seconds, Perkins had the trucker in a full nelson and was inching him toward the exit when the other trucker smashed Lucius over the head with a napkin dispenser.
All hell broke loose and soon, nearly everyone in the restaurant was throwing punches, chairs, and hashbrowns. One man suffered a power bomb onto a table, another woman’s wig was ripped off and thrown onto the grill; it was chaos.
Lucius, confused and staggering from a minor concussion, knew he had to get the situation under control because he wasn’t going back to prison. A light bulb went on in his head and he headed for the jukebox.
He swiftly turned the volume up and made his selection. Mr. Perkins waited and watched. As the dulcet tones of Chris Stapleton’s “Tennessee Whiskey” began to play over the din of moving furniture, punches, and slurs, he noticed a change. Suddenly, one of the truckers released his headlock on one of the frat guys. Another slap fight quickly crapped out as the slappers turned their reddened faces toward the jukebox. Bloodied men and disheveled women, black, white, Latino, and Asian, laid down their fists and chairs in stunned silence.
By the first chorus, the rumble was finished. Ketchup dripped from the light fixtures, the bathroom door was ripped off the hinges, the cash register was in the parking lot, but the combatants were at peace. And then it began. “Youuu’re as smooooooth as Tennessee whiskey…” came the voice of a woman from the window row. It was a keening, unpleasant performance, but it didn’t matter… people joined in. Soon, the Sigma Chi’s were arm in arm swaying with the tattooed Uber driver from Germantown and the truckers were hugging Mr. Perkins, and everyone was singing at the top of their lungs.
By the end of the song, apologies were made and the cleanup began. “Nobody even called the cops,” said Perkins. “This was so beautiful we didn’t wanna mess it up, man I was just crying, humanity can be good sometimes. And thank you, Chris Stapleton. You helped me break my cycle of recidivism. F**k 12.”
The cashier, Cheryl Fontaine, told us that nearly every single person helped clean up and some of them were even friends afterward. “Except that boomer over in the corner,” she pointed. “He keeps saying we’re all frauds because it’s not Coe or Jones’ version. Whatever.”
Labels:
Chris Stapleton,
David Allan Coe,
Fake News,
George Jones,
Satire,
Waffle House
Jan 10, 2023
David Allan Coe is Basically a Hip-Hop Artist
Labels:
David Allan Coe,
Hank Jr.,
Jimmy Buffett,
memes,
Satire
Dec 13, 2022
If David Allan Coe Released a Christmas Album (with Track List)
Labels:
Christmas,
David Allan Coe,
Parody Album Covers,
Satire,
Track List
Nov 7, 2022
Oct 31, 2022
Simpsons Characters as Americana Fans
Labels:
David Allan Coe,
Lucero,
memes,
Paul Cauthen,
Satire,
The Byrds,
The Simpsons,
Tyler Childers,
Vandoliers,
Whiskey Myers,
Zach Bryan
Oct 26, 2022
Oct 6, 2022
Clint Eastwood Country Reaction Gifs
Do ya wanna go see the Vandoliers with me?
Me and my bro toasting Loretta
When she leaves you because you always made fun of her being a huge Morgan Wallen fan
What's your favorite thing about Walker Hayes music?
I was drunk the day my mama got out of prison
and I went to pick her up in the rain
When the car next to you is blasting Russell Dickerson
When them damn outlaw country singers are back in town
They got the Bobby Bones Show playing in the break room again
Aug 12, 2022
May 20, 2022
You Know the Words
Labels:
David Allan Coe,
memes,
Satire,
Walker Hayes
May 17, 2022
6 New David Allan Coe Parody Album Covers
Labels:
David Allan Coe,
Hank Sr.,
Johnny Paycheck,
Parody Album Covers,
Satire
Apr 27, 2022
I Don't Care
Labels:
Bruce Springsteen,
David Allan Coe,
Eli Manning,
Jason Isbell,
memes,
Satire
Apr 26, 2022
DACFGL
Labels:
David Allan Coe,
Florida Georgia Line,
memes,
Satire
Apr 6, 2022
Overly Politically Correct Country Songs
No serious commentary from either side of the aisle, please. Just having fun with language.
---------
Birthing Person, My Partner is Mentally Ill - The Judds
Wichita Lineperson - Glen Campbell
C-O-N-S-C-I-O-U-S U-N-C-O-U-P-L-I-N-G - Tammy Wynette
Quing of the Road - Roger Miller
Good Hearted Adult - Waylon Jennings
Caucasian Tonkin’ - Hank Williams
Xe Stopped Loving Xir Today - George Jones
Seven Latinx Angels - Willie Nelson, Ray Charles
Parent Tried - Merle Haggard
Native American Person Impacted by the Justice System - Tim McGraw
If the Afterlife Isn’t a Lot Like the Southeastern United States - Hank Jr.
I Am a Person of Constant Sorrow - The Soggy Bottom Boys
Folically Blessed Rural Resident - David Allan Coe
You Ain’t Womxn Enough - Loretta Lynn
Gestational Parents, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowpersons - Waylon & Willie
Dec 28, 2021
A Wake Up Call
Labels:
David Allan Coe,
memes,
Satire,
Tennessee Whiskey
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