Showing posts with label Highwomen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Highwomen. Show all posts

Dec 11, 2019

What Your Favorite Album of 2019 Says About You 2



Zac Brown Band - The Owl
You tell everybody you like everything Zac Brown puts out no matter how he experiments, but in secret, you think this sucks.

Beyonce - Homecoming: The Live Album
You will taunt, threaten, curse, dox, and possibly inflict bodily harm upon anyone who says anything negative about this album, but otherwise you’re pretty nice.

Highwomen - s/t
You’re a strong, beautiful, independent woman and so is your significant other.

FGL - Can’t Say I Ain’t Country
You have a jacked up truck with exhaust stacks, fight with your girlfriend in public, and are drunk right now. Dad says your seventh year of community college is your last, graduation or not.

Maren Morris - Girl
You can’t get into the Highwomen album because it’s too country. You use way too many hashtags on Instagram.

Tyler Childers - Country Squire
You have a homemade bootleg live version of the album that’s “way better.” You sold a car out of your front yard for parts to get tickets to Sturgill and Tyler next year.

Puddle of Mudd - Welcome to Galvania
Wait, Puddle of Mudd still exists? You are a member of some guy in the band’s family.

Luke Combs - What You See is What You Get
Just gonna go out on a limb with this one and guess that you enjoy beer.

Vandoliers - Forever
You skate, fish, have purple hair, and are polite to your mama.

Zac Brown - The Controversy
You usually tell everybody you like everything Zac Brown puts out no matter how he experiments, but you gave up your fan club membership and started an anti-Zac Brown Facebook page after hearing this shit.

Post Malone - Hollywood’s Bleeding
You toss around words like ‘molly’ and ‘yeet’ but your 6th grade teacher doesn’t like you to say them in class.

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This is satire. Don't take it seriously.
Idea stolen from Medium.

Dec 3, 2019

Really Dumb Country Reviews: Dec. '19

From a popular digital music service.
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Dan + Shay & Bieber - 10,000 Hours


Highwomen - s/t


Miranda Lambert - Wildcard


Jason Aldean - 9


Cody Jinks - The Wanting

Upchurch - Parachute



Ashley McBryde - One Night Standards


Blake & Trace - Hell Right


Luke Bryan - What She Wants Tonight

Nov 6, 2019

The Billboard Country Top 30 (In My Perfect World)


Yeah yeah. One of you’s thinking “miRanDA laMBeRt sUcKS!” And one of you’s thinking “Where’s Jimmy Bob Reynolds and the Pork-loins (or insert actual artist you enjoy or that I too enjoy and just didn’t put on here)?” This is my perfect world, where Americana, red dirt, and even some pop country live in perfect harmony and give mainstream radio variety and depth. Even if you disagree with a lot of these songs, you have to admit it’d sure be better than the real world’s current country chart.



Oct 2, 2019

Really Dumb Country Reviews: October '19


These are real reviews from a popular digital music service.
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Zac Brown Band - The Owl






The Highwomen - s/t




Jon Pardi - Heartache Medication



Upchurch - Parachute


Sturgill Simpson - Sound & Fury
(yeah, I know it's not actually country)




Miranda Lambert - Wildcard


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