Country Singer Ingredients

*satire, duh*

Who's Gonna Fill 'em?

I'm getting so (old and) forgetful, I wrote this without recalling we'd already posted something 

similar in the past (as if we don't recycle jokes daily). Anyway, my version more closely fits 

the real lyrics and contains current details, even if Marilyn Branson's is funnier and has the 

benefit of a great tune and production (below my lyrics).

 Who's Gonna Fill Their Shoes

(A parody of George Jones' "Who's Gonna Fill Their Shoes")

You know this old world is full of singers
But just a few are chosen
To get it crunk up when they sing
Imagine life without them
All your bro country heroes
Like the cornball that wears those skinny jeans

No, there will never be another
Fat-headed Jason
Face painted black and fist bumping dudes
The dopey Voice host Okie
No what up darlin'
Lord I wonder, who's gonna fill their shoes

[Chorus:]
Who's gonna fill their shoes
Who's gonna yell yeehaw!
Who's gonna sing of hotties
And drinking sweet Fireball
Who's gonna show us how they roll
And sound so auto-tuned
Lord I wonder, who's gonna fill their shoes

God bless the boy from Georgia
Grinding with his pelvis
Singing about shaking it and beers
He sure rocks those skinnies
And really crashed the party
And "That's My Kind of Night" brings me to tears

You know the heart of bro country music
Still beats in Brantley Gilbert
Echoes cross that Florida-Georgia Line
Ol' Hubbard and Brian Kelley
Why I can feel them right here with me
In this chromed out Raptor rolling through the night

[Chorus:]
Who's gonna fill their shoes
Who's gonna yell yeehaw!
Who's gonna sing of hotties
And drinking sweet Fireball
Who's gonna show us how they roll
And take us on a cruise
Lord I wonder, who's gonna fill their shoes

Yes I wonder, who's gonna be a douche?

There's Something About Mary Country Reaction Gifs

When your stepson says he's a huge Big Smo fan

When you try to make your friend stop listening to Lindi Ortega

Riding with your Brantley Gilbert fan cousin like...

Did you know Dave Cobb is Brent Cobb's cousin?

 When your girlfriend walks in after 

you just listened to Turnpike Troubadours

When you meet Hunter Hayes

Monday Morning Memes: Luke Bryan, Ray Charles, FGL

WWE Country Reaction Gifs 16: Chris Lane, Brantley Gilbert, Jamey Johnson, etc.

When you hear FGL's "pink umbrella" line

 Point to someone who looks like a Mumford & Sons fan

When you see an old friend but remember 

he's a Brantley Gilbert fan

Rethinking if you should've asked the barber 

for the Kenny Chesney look

Did Jamey Johnson really co-write 

"Honky Tonk Badonkadonk?"

What is Sam Hunt's greatest contribution to country music?

When your girl says y'all should go to the Chris Lane concert

What you'll see at a Luke Bryan concert

The Crud Report Sept. 16: Aldean, FGL, Bobby Bones

Monday Morning Memes: Isbell, Aldean, Kane Brown, etc.

Country TwitterWINs: August '16

I'm only including this one because of its author. He's back!

 

Middle Fingers Up!

The Crud Report August '16: Luke Bryan, Shooter Jennings, FGL, etc.

Florida-Georgia Line: A Visual Interview

First of all guys, tell us the last book you read.

 How do you two even tolerate your own music?

If not for auto-tune, would you be selling fake Ray-Bans 

and knock-off Yetis on Myrtle Beach right about now?

 You've done an appearance or two with World Wrestling Entertainment. Which one is more fake, WWE or FGL?

 

If you could pick any country legend to record 

a duet with, who would it be?

Do you know anybody sleazier than the two of you?

And finally, is the short haired guy pretty much useless?