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Pop-Country Singer Shares Lovingly Scripted Holiday Family Hijinks

Superstar pop-country singer ____ recently shared some lovingly curated pre-Christmas hijinks with his household. It was highly family-friendly and positive to preclude any naysayers of said artist from finding anything worthy of “hating” on. 

In the series of videos, ____ led his family of 23 people and 2 dogs in a clearly rehearsed musical number featuring songs from Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and Frosty the Snowman. All persons involved, including the children, were as poised and trained as Disney Channel actors and actresses, putting forth the sort of commercially acceptable filler content sites like The Boot and Taste of Country revel in this time of year, with there being little other news of note going on.

Only a Grinch, Scrooge, Satan, or “that ain’t real country” blogger could find any sort of fault in these primped, staged, and PR committee approved scenes of Yuletide glee.

The cynicism-proof videos also featured cutely choreographed dance numbers featuring ____ himself wearing an elf costume and doing whatever TikTok dance is currently in fashion. Once upon a time, the singer was a bit rougher around the edges and said things that rubbed people the wrong way from time to time, but these days he is a straight up f**king Hallmark movie.

To prove they aren’t entirely straight-laced, ____ and his beautiful wife were also seen playing naughty (wholesome and scripted) pranks on one another. In one oh-so-cute clip, ___’s wife dumped a bucket of paper snow on ___’s head as he walked out of the bathroom. He fell to the carpet in premeditated shock and silliness, just like Waylon woulda done if such technology had existed in the late 70s. 

At press time, _____ was helping his social media manager edit a video in which the singer ‘hilariously’ suggests the kids leave out White Claw and Quest bars for Santa.

Best Songs of 2022 Spotlight / Ian Noe / "Road May Flood / It's a Heartache"

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When you think they just said "Morgan Wallen is the best country artist since George Strait"

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 That Holiday Badonkadonk 

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Farce the Music's Top 36 Songs of 2022

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 1. Kaitlin Butts - Blood

2. Adeem the Artist - Middle of a Heart

3. Jamestown Revival - Young Man

4. Plains - I Walked With You a Ways

5. Drew Kennedy - Peace and Quiet

6. Michaela Anne - Oh to Be That Free Again

7. 49 Winchester - Russell County Line

8. Big Thief - Certainty

9. Bonnie Raitt - Just Like That

10. Arlo McKinley - Stealing Dark from the Night Sky

11. Jason Scott & The High Heat - Suffering Eyes

12. Madeline Edwards - Port City

13. Kendell Marvel - Dyin' Isn't Cheap

14. Aaron Raitiere - Everybody Else

15. Ray Wylie Hubbard ft. Lzzy Hale & John 5 - Naturally Wild

16. Miko Marks & The Resurrectors - This Time

17. Ian Noe - Road May Flood/It's a Heartache

18. Pusha T - Rock N Roll

19. Hailey Whitters - College Town

20. Gabe Lee - Wide Open

21. Tami Neilson & Willie Nelson - Beyond the Stars

22. Randall King - Around Forever

23. The Wilder Blue - Feelin' the Miles

24. Band of Horses - In the Hard Times

25. Ashley McBryde/Caylee Hammack/Brandy Clark - Bonfire at Tina's

26-35 not ranked

Ben Chapman & Channing Wilson - Things People Say

American Aquarium - Just Close Enough

Zoe Cummins & Gabe Lee - Common Law

Bri Bagwell - Old Together

King Margo - Wildfire

Vandoliers - Before the Fall

Wade Bowen - Burning Both Ends of the Bar

Julie Roberts - When You Wake Up (in the Bed You Made)

John Fullbright - Social Skills

Charley Crockett - Trinity River

Sunny Sweeney ft. Vince Gill - Married Alone

Top 10 Things Morgan Wallen Fans Want for Christmas

 By Jeremy Harris and Trailer

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10. Dismissal of their public intoxication charges

9. Joy (Joy is their third cousin, not “a feeling of great happiness”)

8. Mullet grooming kit

7. A “white” Christmas

6. Some extra Sudafed for their “sinus” issues

5. To graduate with the rest of their buddies on the bass fishing team

4. LED lights for the bumper, the mirrors, the roof, the wheel wells, everywhere… so the front of their truck can burn with the light of a million suns and blind oncoming traffic three counties away

3. For the front-squatted truck to become the new fad

2. Jason Isbell to write another heartfelt song they’ll never hear him sing live

1. A black friend, so they can say they have a black friend

Best Songs of 2022 Spotlight / John Fullbright / "Social Skills"

Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays