Mar 12, 2022
Mar 11, 2022
New Video / Yelawolf & Shooter Jennings / "Jump Out the Window"
From the new album Sometimes Y, out today.
Struggling Country Band Reckons They’ll Just Buy an Electric Van Now
At the urging of celebrities to “walk, take public transportation, or buy an EV” to defray rising costs, the band figures the latter is the most doable. “We can’t walk to Chattanooga or Asheville, and there’s no public interstate transportation, and Greyhound won’t let us bring the amps and monitors, so I guess we’ll just spring for a $53,000 electric touring van,” says lead singer Aaron Lavox. “No biggie.”
The Whiskey Hawks, who have made a profit of $631.09 doing spotty tours over the last two pandemic stricken years, expect to pool their individual savings, kids’ college accounts, and the tips drummer Gus makes at the BBQ restaurant, and will only have five-thousand or so left to go. They plan to start a Go Fund Me to make up that difference.
“It’s surely a sound investment; I’m thankful these wealthy famous folks who live in metropolitan areas where it’s easy to walk or take a subway let me know these great tips on saving money!” laughed bassist James Squier. “Don’t get me wrong, we definitely support Ukraine, despite the fact that you sense that we may be being facetious about buying a van, but let me assure you we are not.”
Russia’s invasion of Ukraine has sent oil prices soaring in recent days, never mind that they were already soaring before that. Some analysts remind us that gas prices this high preceded the so-called Great Recession a few years back, but The Whiskey Hawks just laugh off all the doom-saying.
“Shiittt, I can’t wait to plug that bad boy in and drive for three hours then plug that bad boy in then drive for three more hours, then plug that bad boy in, then get to Nashville to play for beer and $500,” smiled guitarist Steve Hobert. “It’s definitely our place to suffer for the government and oil companies’ greed and failure to have the resources and system in place to avoid such economic calamities.”
At press time, the guys were deciding which of them were healthy enough to sell plasma.
Mar 10, 2022
George Carlin Country Reaction Gifs
There will be foul language. Duh.
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If somebody who hasn't listened to country radio since 1998 turns on country radio now
Just a big red goodbye in lipstick on the wall
Someone who says country music is dead is
When your wife has to stay with her sick mom and can't take the kids to the Luke Bryan concert
"Why won't you go with me to the Aldean show? You can just get drunk and talk trash."
Parker McCollum is talented and tall and handsome?
When you clicked play on Sturgill's Sound & Fury
If you're starting to think Walker Hayes isn't as bad as everybody says
You started listening to Morgan Wallen only because the left hates him, even though you don't like pop country?
Mar 9, 2022
New Video / Ian Noe / "Burning Down the Prairie"
From the forthcoming River Fools & Mountain Saints.
Road Dispatch: Brent Cobb, City Winery (ATL), 2/25/22
By Kevin Broughton
“Man, we played Macon last night, and I kinda blew my voice out,” are the first words out of Brent Cobb’s mouth during a brief tour-bus visit before a late February show in Atlanta. And why wouldn’t it happen? Macon’s just 70 miles up the road from Cobb’s hometown of Ellaville; what to expect, if not a rocking show?
“The response on this tour has been overwhelming,” says Cobb, who recently released an album of Southern gospel standards, And Now, Let’s Turn to Page… “In places like Manhattan, even, they love it when we play the gospel record live, beginning to end. You’re gonna like this show.”
And yet, there’s one more tour stop, tomorrow in Nashville. Our boy was gonna have to dig deep.
And dig deep he would. Atlanta’s a good bit further from Ellaville than Macon, but there’s a partisan Cobb crowd on hand. It’s largely respectful of the opening act – rising country star Gabe Lee – but there’s a sense of anticipation bordering on rowdy.
As the moment arrives, Cobb and the band make quite the entrance: the front man in a shiny, mother-of-pearl-colored jacket with raised paisley, his bandmates sporting Kelly-green blazers of their own. The night is actually three concerts in one, as most of the songs from the gospel record make an appearance. After a quick jacket swap – as mother-of-pearl gives way to mustard corduroy – there’s a brief acoustic solo set, followed by a full-band, secular rocker to close things out.
It’s not until the last leg that Cobb’s vocal fatigue peeks in. “So, we played Macon last night, and I kinda blew my voice out,” he tells the crowd, before addressing the sound man. “Could we double up the vocal monitors, please?” And he soldiered on, including this live version of his 2020, tongue-in-cheek “Shut Up And Sing.”
Unsurprisingly, the lights come on after the last song of the set, signifying there’ll be no encores. Nobody complains, knowing they’ve watched a native son leave it all on the stage.
Top 10 Things Brantley Gilbert Fans Are Spending Their Tax Refunds On 2022
10. A blood transfusion for the hookworm
9. Put $1500 on Roman Reigns to unify the titles at Wrestlemania
8. Soundcloud Pro Unlimited subscription for their NASCAR themed hick-hop group
7. Pay the painter to finish the Marjorie Taylor Greene mural on the trailer
6. One of those little pill counting thingies pharmacists have
5. Alt-right NFTs
4. Surely there’s something left to add lights to on the pickup truck
3. Swingers’ vacation to Myrtle Beach with wife who is also aunt*
2. Upgrade cock-fighting arena
1. Gas. Hell, who isn’t?
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*satire - not suggesting the two people in the picture are related*
Mar 8, 2022
Mar 7, 2022
New Video / Ray Wylie Hubbard, Willie Nelson / "Stone Blind Horses"
From the forthcoming Co-Starring Too.
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