Showing posts with label Satire. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Satire. Show all posts

Jan 24, 2025

Fixing What Ain't Broken



*independent, as in mostly independent artists

Last Call


Morgan Wallen Fan Secretly Wishes Current Single Was Produced by Diplo and Featured 21 Savage

Morgan Wallen fan Walker Dylan has publicly declared Wallen's current single "Smile" to be fire and "he don't miss," but secretly wishes it was more bussin'. Across social media, he proclaimed the track as "dope ASL" and said he was glad Wallen made country music rizzed up again but Dylan is honestly kind of disappointed.

"I mean, I ain't gone throw shade on my dude, but I can't listen to "Smile" around my boys," said Dylan. "It ain't even got any beats or a guest rapper." He went on to say he wished the song was produced by Diplo or Tay Keith, and maybe had some 21 Savage bars.

"I could bump it in my Raptor then, but it's kinda mid and gay FR," he explained. "But if I get crashed out on some White Claw and in my feelings, maybe maybe I'll listen in my AirPods so nobody thinks I'm lame."

Walker, a 23 year old sophomore at Arkansas State Mid-South Community College, says he mostly listens to artists like old Post Malone, Lil Baby, Don Toliver, Lefty Gunplay, and Gelo, but claims "country is my heart and soul no cap." He went on to name Bailey Zimmerman, Alan Strait, classic Florida-Georgia Line, and Tim Degraw as some of the country performers he enjoys.

"Country ain't really the vibe unless some hoes pull through," laughed Mr. Dylan. "But Wallen is the GOAT; hope his next joint bring that fire like "Cowgirls."

At press time, Walker Dylan was getting a ticket for cutting through the Dairy Queen parking lot because he was late for College Algebra.




I realize half this slang isn't current; I'm just trying to annoy people, as usual

Jan 23, 2025

Achy Breaky Voice


Amateur vs. Professional


Seinfeld Country Reaction Gifs

Can you say anything nice about Bailey Zimmerman's music?

If you claim to love George "Straight"

Jelly Roll's favorite pastime, allegedly

When the cops never suspected Mary Anne or Wanda

Pondering how non-hip-hop pop-music became 'country' and country became 'Americana'

When people say twang pop is just country music evolving

The guy who runs Farce the Music when he makes another 19 year old Kane Brown fan angry online

You mean the embarrassing one hit wonder mullet guy from the 90s embarrassed himself again in 2025? I'm shocked!

Country record execs turning down an average looking person who can sing their ass off

What happens when a dude listens to Dan + Shay?

The comments on my Facebook page when I make fun of Jason Aldean or Kid Rock


(4th Edition of Seinfeld reactions)

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