Country My Arse

Enough With the Reboots

Dedication to Craft

There's Still Good Country Music on the Radio

 

Wrasslin' Country Reaction Gifs #85

That dude who drove 400 miles to see Tyler Childers, standing alone, praying for a third encore so he can hear "Whitehouse Road"

When Lucero and Stugill are playing successive nights in your town and you're over 40

Me when the dude who bought the last large Silverada shirt I wanted busts his ass on the way out of the show

Sturgill Simpson when he was about to drop Sound & Fury

When you’re bald AF and can't find your Cody Jinks cap

When you hear what sounds like an Otis Redding song being sung over by a pop-country douchebag

When you ask an Americana singer if he can spare some beard oil

Dasha or Shaboozey's next big hit

When you tell your friend you think Zach Bryan is pretty good so he’ll shut the f**k up about him 

Garth burying the body of country music which he singularly killed, as I’m too often reminded 

What does John Cougar Mellencamp do when somebody hands him a chili dog?

Charlie Brown & Peanuts Country Reaction Gifs

"Give me one reason we can't listen to Kane Brown"

Dustin Lynch’s career

Me after listening to Lori McKenna for a couple hours 

A review of Luke Combs’ new album 

Another term for "sad songs make me happy" is:

Stay all night stay a little longer

Every time I give Hardy another chance despite his last song sounding like nails thrown into a box fan

How I sleep after gatekeeping country music all day

Live footage from Kid Rock's Rock the Country tour

The moment you discover the exact temperature of hoochie coochie

The World's Hardest CAPTCHA

Apples and Oranges

Wrestler/Country Singer Mashups

How Bad is Your Taste in Country Music?

The Longest Yard Country Reaction Gifs

Still better than listening to a Kane Brown song

Bro-country videos be like

"Yeah, I'll admit I'm coming around on Jason Aldean; he's such a great singer and seems like a nice fella.

Tyler Childers when he's about to play "Follow You to Virgie"

When you ask an Upchurch fan the last book they read

When you're over 40 trying to power through a late night concert and that 7th beer kicks in

When an elder country singer tries to hit a high note these days

I keep waiting for you to forgive me

And you keep saying you can't even start

So when those three little words come so easy to you

I hope you know what I mean when I say...

Dustin Lynch attempting to make a country song

When your dumbest friend suggests you all go see a Morgan Wallen concert

Watches Childers' "In Your Love" video one (1) time

Daring New Country Singer Blends Varied Influences Into His Shitty Music

Daring new country singer Skip Malone is on deck for stardom, and he’s here to put Nashville on notice. The dashing 21-year-old out of West Memphis, AR, wants everyone to know that he won’t put out a note of music that wasn’t influenced by music he actually listens to, everything he listens to.

His debut single “Night Like What” blends the stylings of Green Day, Drake, and Kenny Chesney into an unbearable mess of soulless slop. And that’s what he’s counting on. Not on it being an unbearable mess of soulless slop, he’s counting on over-30 country fans to think it’s an unbearable mess of soulless slop. 

“No shade, but I hope they hate it!” laughed Malone. “The more the ops can’t stand it, the more streams we’ll do. You and Saving Country Music and all those blue hairs on Twitter will probably put more cash in my Venmo than the quality of my music.” 

Newly signed to DBAG69, a subsidiary of Mercury Nashville, Malone is already scheduled to open for Dustin Lynch at some shows before his godawful song has even been released to radio. He says the company has promised their full support behind him, already purchasing a tour bus from an ailing legend, and plastering Malone’s ultra-punchable face all over it. 

“TikTok is where we’re really taking off,” said Malone. “Got videos of college girls dancing to “night like what what what” all over the place. It’s humbling fr fr.” (Editor’s note: He actually said “fr fr” out loud)

The song itself, about (you guessed it) meeting a girl in a bar and driving out to the country in his suburban assault truck, sounds like someone having a mild stroke during a Florida-Georgia Line karaoke performance. There’s snap beats, metal riffs, a hint of banjo, an EDM breakdown, a rapped bridge, and autotune galore. It’s as if every channel on Sirius XM was played on top of one another at once, but with a singular programmed beat. 

Currently dating one of Morgan Wallen’s leftovers, Skip Malone looks to have a massive year and he’s excited. “It’s gone be bussin going on tour with Dustin Lynch and dropping this fire later this year.” he smiled. 

At press time, Skip Malone was putting the finishing touches on his second single, “No Simp No Cap.”

Still More Tuesday Memes: Sturgill Simpson, Jelly Roll, Dustin Lynch

The Santa Clause Country Reaction Gifs

Me when somebody says they 

grew up on Tyler Childers' music

Boogity! Boogity!

You'll always be a fire I can't put out

New mainstream country songwriters trying to think of truck models and beer brands to put in their song

Well I woke up Sunday morning

With no way to hold my head that didn't hurt

When your stepmom is really into Kane Brown music

When there's one dude in the Americana band who doesn't look the part

When the first song they play at the office Christmas party is "The Christmas Shoes"

"Is Dustin Lynch a country singer?"

Jason Aldean's vocal style can best be described as: