Showing posts with label Florida Georgia Line. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Florida Georgia Line. Show all posts

May 21, 2020

The Lion King Country Reaction Gifs

"Wanna hear some Avenue Beat?"

If you're surrounded by Kane Brown fans

Kenny Chesney's career since 2000

When Simba says Sam Hunt songs are great even if they aren't country 

 You'll have the same reaction to a Lori McKenna song as you do this scene

Florida-Georgia Line has a new EP coming out!

Hank 3? Jamey Johnson?

"Everywhere the light touches, Luke Bryan sucks"

May 19, 2020

Carl Outlaw, Real Country Fan, Reviews Jason Isbell & The 400 Unit’s Reunions


I’m back and Trailer wants me too review a whole album? Nice way to welcome a brother out of “lock down” (lol, as if I’ve been doing any thing different). I don’t no who Jason Isbell is but Trailer assured me that its the kind of music he usually promotes on this website. 

I didn’t listen to this album. I just went on my Reddit to see what people who thinks like me think of Jason Isable. They said he’s a loony liberal so I didn’t listen too it. Sorry Trailer. You can’t induct me in two you’re communist think tank. In fact, I might not ever write for this blog again. Its dangerous to promote this kind of life style. If you don’t except are president and his beliefs 100% than your a sheep. Think for your self!

I seen the first song is called “What Have I Done to Help” and so I read the lyrics and its just about feeling guilty because he’s rich. All you gotta do is donate some to charity and your good, buddy. Song over.

People some times call this “alt-country” so since that’s close to “country” I admit to listening for 5 seconds, but their was nothing country about it. “Dreamsicle” is a song about a popsicle and its like folk or pop or something but its definitely something I’d be embarrassed for my homies to here playing out of my truck speakers. If there is any instrument besides a fiddle, steal guitar and maybe an acoustic guitar, its not country music, or even close.



This stuff myaswell be Luke Bryant music. Who’s she? Anyway, I see on the picture their’s a woman in the band. She’s to pretty to be in a real country band, so theirs another clue. 



I read the lyrics for one more song since folks on r/DontTreadonCountryMusic was complaining about it. Its called “Be Afraid” and I thought with a title like that it might be okay, but its not. Its a song telling us music fans to stop telling singers to “shut up and sing” or something like that. But I don’t care, SHUT UP AND SING. If a commie told me that breathing air is good for you I would put a bag over my head. LOL. In this song Jason tells other bands that they are p***ies if they don’t sing about politics. Well spill my vape juice, that’s some bullshit. Your a p***** if YOU DOES SING ABOUT POLITICS. Accept Charlie Daniels, it’s fine when he does.

In summery, this is a bad album and I’d rather listen to Georgia-Florida Line than Mr. Isabell and his Unit. And I’d rather slice off my pecker with a dull spork than listen to them so you no its bad. 



May 14, 2020

The Jerk Country Reaction Gifs

The day Tyler Hubbard learned life wasn't what he expected

When somebody shows up to the fair with a full set of teeth and not wearing a Brantley Gilbert t-shirt

Oh you think Sam Hunt is country?

Me when somebody insults Dolly Parton

Looking at the country charts again...

When "Stay a Little Longer" comes on 

Leaving the Koe Wetzel concert like

Teaching your kid the difference between good country music and Luke Bryan

May 8, 2020

The Current Poop of Mainstream Country Radio: May 2020

A poop emoji is negative. A strike-thru is positive.


The current Poop Rating of the Mediabase Top 20 is (6) overall which is a 25(!!) point improvement from December (the previous time we did this chart). I wouldn’t say the country chart is more country these days, but the quality has improved by leaps and bounds. There’s more depth. There are more women. The worst song is Florida-Georgia Line’s “I Love My Country.” The best song is Maddie & Tae’s “Die From a Broken Heart,” which has been on the charts for …ever, it seems.

Chart info from Mediabase/Country Aircheck.

May 1, 2020

Country Blogger Has Been Social Distancing for Years

The country music blogger Trailer has been prepared for something like this Covid-19 pandemic for years. Now that it has come to pass, he’s in his element and thriving.

Trailer, who runs the satire and review site Farce the Music, says social distancing has been a part of his life for many years now. “Well, since I’m a big, fat, jealous hater, people have never wanted to be around me anyway,” said the reclusive meme maker. The blog is well known for making fun of country artists that the general public loves and adores, lending to Trailer’s outcast nature.

“The biggest problem for me right now is that without new albums, tours, and interviews going on, I don’t have a lot to make fun of,” he said. “Mostly I just go around on YouTube videos calling children and teenagers idiots for liking Kane Brown… it’s pretty fun.” 

The general negativity in society right now is nothing new for Trailer, who spends far more time talking bad about singers he doesn’t like than he does being positive about artists he enjoys. “I bet Luke Bryan is living it up without a worry in the world… the damn sparkeldy skinny jeans wearing poser.” said the spiteful loser, as his mom brought him some more Totino’s Pizza Rolls. 

“I don’t like music to evolve. Genres should stay the same as they were when they were invented, and right now there aren’t any studios open for Florida-Georgia Line to be auto-tuner emo rapping in, and that makes me happy.” laughed the crusty cynic.

At press time, Trailer was grumbling while walking up out of the basement to help his mom with the dishes.

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