Others have done this in the past, but no one has stepped up this year so far, so....
Showing posts with label bro-country. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bro-country. Show all posts
Jun 5, 2014
CMA Fest 2014 Bingo!
Labels:
Big Smo,
Bingo,
Brantley Gilbert,
bro-country,
CMA Fest,
Daryl Worley,
Justin Moore,
Luke Bryan,
Satire,
Scotty McCreery
Jun 4, 2014
Last "Keep Calm" Memes Ever
Labels:
bro-country,
Gary Levox,
Jerry Reed,
Keep Calm,
memes,
Satire,
Unknown Hinson,
Wallet Chains
Jun 3, 2014
She Stopped Shakin' It Today
Based on this. Kinda NSFW.
"She Stopped Shakin' It Today"
(Parody of George Jones' "He Stopped Loving Her Today")
She said I'll shake it all your life
He told her I like your tan lines
As her butt would slowly grind
He sipped apple pie moonshine
He kept her picture on his dash
Of his lifted chromed-out truck
He loved him that country ass
Twerkin' to "Turn Down For What"
Got her name tatted on his leg
Barbed wire heart in red and blue
And every time she gave him head
He would whisper I love you
I saw him at the gym today
Slamming down weights, stinking of beer
Said his girl had gone away
First time he missed callin' me queer
She stopped shakin' it today
He texted her that she's a whore
And soon he'll cry and smoke a j
She stopped shakin' it today.
[Spoken:]
Ya' know she gave him one last phone call
And she was pissed off about the crabs
Said "we're through" and he punched the wall
Buried his face in his ball cap
[Sang:]
She stopped shakin' it today
He texted her that she's a whore
And soon he'll wreck his Chevrolet
She stopped shakin' it today.
Labels:
bro-country,
George Jones,
parody
May 28, 2014
Fun With Charts and Graphs: Bro-country, Trucks...
Labels:
bro-country,
FGL,
Fun With Charts and Graphs,
Roughstock,
Sturgill Simpson,
Trucks
May 27, 2014
Bro-Country Legends: AJ
This is a new series of posts created by the Cooper Brothers. That's as much explanation as you'll need.
May 21, 2014
Brantley Gilbert! Thomas Rhett! Justin Moore! (Honest Ad!)
Labels:
Brantley Gilbert,
bro-country,
Honest Ads,
Justin Moore,
Satire,
Thomas Rhett
May 14, 2014
Brantley + Justin + Thomas: New Single Cover Revealed
Labels:
Brantley Gilbert,
bro-country,
Justin Moore,
Photocrap,
Satire,
Thomas Rhett
May 12, 2014
Put Your Hands Up for Variety!
Labels:
bro-country,
FGL,
Jerrod Niemann,
Luke Bryan,
memes,
The Lacs
Apr 25, 2014
The Bro-mericana Song (Lyrical Satirical)
The Bro-mericana Song
©2014 FTM Satire
Drove my El Camino
Down past the silo
Pulled into the party spot
Cracked a Blue Ribbon
Lit up a Spirit
Asked if anyone had some pot
This is my bro-mericana song
Break out the banjos, break out the bongs
Groom your beard and sing along
This is the bro-mericana song
We talk politics
Crank up some Deer Tick
And take ourselves real serious
The girls are all tattooed
And I defy any dude
To mention one's gluteus
This is my bro-mericana song
Break out the guitars, get our folk on
Groom your beard and sing along
This is the bro-mericana song
Bridge
No flat brims, no jacked trucks
Just pearl snaps and Levi Strauss
Careful where you park your Prius
Nobody here can pull you out
This is my bro-mericana song
Break out the dobro, break out the bongs
Groom your beard and sing along
This is the bro-mericana song
Labels:
Americana,
bro-country,
Deer Tick,
Lyrical Satirical
Apr 19, 2014
Country Radio Content Pie Chart
Labels:
bro-country,
Country Radio,
Fun With Charts and Graphs,
Trucks
Apr 18, 2014
Top 10 Majors at Thomas Rhett University
10. Social Media Reputation Reclamation
9. Jacked-up Truck Maintenance
8. Keg-Stand Theory
7. Moneymaker Shaking 101
6. Effective Hazing Techniques and Strategies
3. Molly Popping
2. Transmitting Sexual Diseases
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Labels:
bro-country,
Satire,
Thomas Rhett,
Top Ten Lists
Apr 15, 2014
Official FTM Country eCards™ #1: FGL
Labels:
bro-country,
FGL,
FTM eCards,
Satire
If You're Gonna Play in Georgia... (Alabama Parody)
"If You're Gonna Play In Georgia
(You Gotta Have A DJ In The Band)"
(Parody of Alabama's "If You're Gonna Play in Texas (You Gotta Have a Fiddle in the Band)"
If you're gonna play in Georgia, you gotta have a DJ in the band
That lead guitar's alright but son, not for a Leesburg man
So make that EQ bounce for "Country Girl" and let's all jam
If you're gonna play in Georgia, you gotta have a DJ in the band
I remember down in Macon we were playin' country songs
When a frat-boy in the back stood up and yelled, "Get Your Shine On!"
He said, "We hate what you're doin', we need the thump real strong,
Bro, that twang you're twangin' don't belong"
If you're gonna play in Georgia, you gotta have a DJ in the band
That lead guitar's alright but not for a Columbus man
So make that EQ bounce with some Colt Ford and let's all jam
If you're gonna play in Georgia, you gotta have a DJ in the band
So we flattened our cap brims and borrowed some sweet wallet chains
Them Georgians jumped and hollered when Jeff smiled and dropped the bass
You say y'all all wanna twerk it
You say ya wanna grind a ho'
Well, here's your douche-bag song before we go
If you're gonna play in Georgia, you gotta have a DJ in the band
That lead guitar's alright but son, not for a Smyrna man
So make them hotties bounce for "Bottoms Up" and let's all jam
If you're gonna play in Georgia, you gotta have a DJ in the band
If you're gonna play in Georgia, you gotta have a DJ in the band
That lead guitar's okay, but son, not for a Moultrie man
So make that EQ bounce for "Chillin' It" and let's all jam
If you're gonna play in Georgia, you gotta have a DJ in the band
Labels:
Alabama,
Brantley Gilbert,
bro-country,
Cole Swindell,
Colt Ford,
FGL,
Luke Bryan,
parody
Apr 11, 2014
Country eCards: April '14
Labels:
bro-country,
Country eCards,
Luke Bryan,
Satire,
Trucks
Mar 24, 2014
Monday Morning Memes: Luke Bryan, Jason Aldean, etc.
Labels:
bro-country,
Jason Aldean,
Luke Bryan,
memes,
Satire,
Wallet Chains
Mar 18, 2014
If Dallas Davidson Had Written These Big Hits
FTM ponders what these famous rock, R&B, rap and country songs would have sounded like if Dallas Davidson or any of his compadres had written them...
Pearl Jam - Even Flow
Gravel road, trucks arrive tires oversized
Oh, bring some hoes, who can make the sugar shake
Better yet, we'll have Miller Lite again
Lite again, Lite again...
Roberta Flack - First Time Ever I Saw Your Face
The first time ever I saw dat ass
I felt my skinny jeans start to rise
And the moon and the stars over my tailgate
Got to watch me get in them thighs
Merle Haggard - Fightin' Side of Me
If you gone mad-dog, step up:
Let these brass knucks be a warnin'.
If you're cock-blockin' on hotties, son,
You bout to meet the fightin' side of me.
Carl Perkins (Elvis Presley) - Blue Suede Shoes
Well, it's one for the honeys,
Two for the shine,
Three for my Chevy,
Past the county line.
But don't you step on my square-toed boots.
You can do anything but lay off of my square-toed boots.
Jay-Z - 99 Problems
99 problems but a hitch ain't one
If you need to pull a trailer, get a Smittybilt son
I got 99 problems but a hitch ain't one
Hit me
Mar 17, 2014
Monday Morning Memes: Chase Rice, Luke Bryan, Big Machine, etc.
Mar 14, 2014
Drop it Like a Tailgate (Girl)
(Drop it Like a) Tailgate
©2014 FTM Satire
Rick Ross on the Fosgates
Raptor rollin' can't be late
Country girl for a hot date
Cut-offs make my heart race
Drive out where the crops grow
Pickups by the dirt rows
Bass kickin' errbody know
She's here to rock the show
(Girl)
Drop it like a tailgate
Shake it like an earthquake
Wiggle like some live bait
Girl
Switch it up crank some Luke Bryan
Honey-thang move that behind
Fireballin' no I don't mind
Gettin' crunk like a combine
Bro mad-doggin' wanna fight
Chill dude, it's a'ight
Get faded on some Bud Light
Let's all have a good night
(And watch her)
Drop it like a tailgate
Stop it like a disk brake
Make a gay dude go straight
Girl
Bridge
Every Friday I do the same
Wife beater and a wallet chain
Fly hotties and spittin' game
I already forgot her name
(but she can)
Drop it like a tailgate
Float it like a snowflake
Curvy as a rat snake
Girl
Yeah,
Drop it like a tailgate
Throw it like a bouquet
Hotter than a burnt steak
Girl
Thanks to @Cati_Jolyn for the cash money hook!
Labels:
booty,
bro-country,
FGL,
Luke Bryan,
Lyrical Satirical,
Original Lyrics,
Satire,
Trucks
Mar 13, 2014
Bro-Country Song Idea Generator
The Americana Band Name Generator a few weeks back was such a hit, I figured I'd make another one. And this one's more helpful in making actual money! Click below...
Bro-country Song Inspiration Generator
Mar 6, 2014
Country Bumper Stickers March '14: Chase Rice, BG, etc.
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