Farce the Music: Satire

Showing posts with label Satire. Show all posts

Apr 13, 2021

Apr 12, 2021

More Monday Memes: Randy Travis, Luke Bryan, George Jones

Monday Morning Memes: Luke Bryan, Kane Brown, Dolly Parton

Apr 11, 2021

Unhinged Garth Brooks Photo of the Week

Apr 9, 2021

Man Was Just Concerned Band Might Not Play Songs They Play at Every Show

The man who kept yelling out the names of songs the band plays at every show was just concerned they wouldn’t. He didn’t realize he was annoying you with his constant hollering of obvious song titles, and acting pissed when they didn’t play one of those songs immediately after his obnoxious request.

Lee Baker, of Tallahassee, is a contractor and father of three, who because of the pandemic and his family duties hasn’t been to a live music show in over 2 years. You may recognize him as the average looking dad with dark circles under his eyes who’s always alone at Americana, country, and folk rock shows, very drunk, and looking as if he hasn’t been out of the house in ages.

“Well, I haven’t been to a show in over 2 years,” said Baker. “And I haven’t been out of the house in ages, so I just wanted to make sure I’d hear my favorites. Is that so wrong? ”

“It was so wrong.” said the band’s lead singer. “As if we weren’t going to get around to our three most popular songs that our fans love singing along to at literally every single show we do. He might as well have yelled at me to ‘make vocalizations with your throat, tongue, and mouth!’”

Like a Skynyrd fan yelling “Free Bird!,” Baker held his IPA in the air and continuously screamed out titles that are so much a part of the bands repertoire that they don’t even include them on the typed out set list any more. “What’s he think?” asked the group’s bassist. “We’re gonna play Luke Bryan covers and deep cuts all night?!”

“He even yelled out one song they’d already played,” said another exasperated show goer. “I’ve talked to him before and he’s a nice guy until the lights go down. He needs to get laid.”

Apr 8, 2021

Me So Corny

The Mullet Contest

Wrasslin' Country Reaction Gifs #49 XL Edition

It's Wrestlemania week, so here's an extra large edition of country reaction gifs.

If your friend doesn’t like Arlo McKinley

When I see FGL has yet another #1 song

When I see Alan Jackson’s new album has 21 songs

“Country music is an amalgamation of all America’s styles of music”

When somebody tries to tell me Chris Gaines and Garth Brooks are the same person

If I went to a pop-country music festival, I’d leave like this

Hey, let’s listen to my new Luke Bryan deluxe edition

When you walk in the bar in a good mood and they’re playing Parmalee

Niko Moon doesn’t like sad songs. Well f*** him, I do

To the hard rock bottom of your heart

Apr 7, 2021

Alan Jackson's Songwriting Inspiration

Top 10 Biggest Jerks in Southern Rock

Most of these “jerk” lists have been surprising. This one, not as much. Rock stars are well known for ego and snotty behavior. Even though they may put off good vibes online or when meeting fans, here are some of Southern Rock’s most egregious offenders.

10. Gregg Allman

Only married Cher to piss off southern rock fans. Kept bus fridge stocked with clean urine despite never actually having to take drug tests.

9. Wes Bayliss (The Steel Woods)

Thinks turn signals are for the weak. Has a side job as one of those people who calls you about your car’s warranty.

8. Marcus King

Still draws dicks on sleeping bandmates like it’s a 1997 frat house. Insists upon a state trooper entourage walking him to the stage.

7. Dan Baird (Georgia Satellites)

Only plays “Keep Your Hands to Yourself” in a medley at concerts. Hangs the toilet paper “under.”

6. Cody Cannon (Whiskey Myers)

Puffs, puffs, puts it out. Secretly a hit pop-country songwriter under the alias Corey Crowder. Burps and blows in your face.

5. Susan Tedeschi

Only allows mainstream country stations to be played over the tour bus speakers. Makes band sign non-disclosure agreements so no one knows about her Red Man habit. One member is being fired at this moment.

4. Charlie Starr (Blackberry Smoke)

Talks in a fake Southern aristocrat accent for interviews. Doesn’t flush. Doesn’t put his grocery cart up.

3. Dale Krantz Rossington (The Rossington Band, Skynyrd)

Used to hide rotten fruit in Leon Russell’s beard while he was asleep. Cheats at Words with Friends. Hollers “Play Free Bird!” while actually on the stage with Lynyrd Skynyrd.

2. Derek Trucks

Never responds to text messages. Intentionally uses poor grammar and spelling on Facebook posts to trigger perfectionists. Personally selects the pre-show monitor music: all Ricky Martin hits. Doesn’t pick up after his dog.