Just in Time For Fall Fairs and Carnivals!

Honest Radio Promo Ad: Big Machine (Borchetta's Label)

Country Day July '13 Parody Covers 3: Coe, Laura Bell Bundy, Justin Moore

In the Year 2030: July '13

Scott Borchetta again pimping the latest late-teens country-pop ingenue

and it's way creepier than ever.

Blackjack Billy enjoy a case of Old Milwaukee and fondly

recall that time they put an album out 17 years ago.

Number 1 country song is the hip-hop anthem "Slut-ass Hoe" which wasn't

even released to country radio but gained interest because the rapper casually

mentioned being from the south in the lyrics.

Shooter Jennings/Triggerman feud enters its 20th year with no sign of a truce.

A retired Ronnie Dunn lists his career regrets as follows: breaking up B&D,

that rap song in 2013, and that EDM album in 2014.

Trucks banned for environmental reasons. 

Country radio shuts down until songwriters can regroup.

Hunter Hayes' career comes to an end when his voice finally changes.

Shinedown's third country album goes double platinum.

Rascal Flatts plan reunion tour, to the delight of caterers across America.

Aging Brantley Gilbert fans dismayed to find that their sagging

BG tattoos now resemble the word "butt" in cursive.

Country Day March '13 Part 4: Pistol Annies, Joe Diffie, etc.

McGraw, Swift, Urban - Highway Don't Care (Honest Radio Promo Ad)

Honest Taylor Swift "For Your Consideration" Ad

Monday Morning Memes: ZBB, Borchetta, etc.

From Jeremy Harris

Little Known Facts Jan. 2013

The 2012 average wage of a Brantley Gilbert fan is $9,078.
Hank Jr fan - $16,231 but would've been much higher with a republican in the White House.
Kid Rock fan -  NA (No filings recorded with the IRS.)
Avett Brothers - $0 due to all being stay at home moms

Plans for a life size Justin Moore action figure were scrapped by Hasbro when the only prototype was dropped down a heating vent.

Even without music Gary Levox would be wealthy due to him selling his chocolate fountain design to Golden Corral.

An Australian newscaster once asked Jamey Johnson what a honky tonk badonkadonk was. Anyone that has information on the whereabouts of the reporter, please contact the Sydney Police Department.

Colt Ford controls the market price of all poultry in the USA based solely on his appetite.

Due to his preferred choice of pants, Luke Bryan's penis is six inches wide but only 1/16 of an inch thick.

Brantley Gilbert spent over $42,000 on removal of misspelled tattoos in 2012 alone.

The guys in Florida-Georgia Line were actually born in Delaware and Rhode Island, respectively.

Scott Borchetta's hair care routine consists of a regular professional wash and conditioning (the latter in the blood of a half dozen puppies).

Bucky Covington writed dis fakt purseonly.


*Thanks to Jeremy Harris for most of these.

Top 10 Goals for Scott Borchetta in 2013

10. Produce more songs that substitute rhyming words for curse words. 

9. Further soil the sanctity of country radio. 

8. Annihilate Trailer Parkman

7. Taylor Swift "Black"

6. Make it illegal to have a fiddle in the band even if  you're going to play in Texas. 

5. New Axe scent: Brantley

4. Rename it "The Grand New Opry"

3. Find more duos that are separated by a few miles and a state line. 

2. Punch Jason Isbell in the mouth for his comments on stage at the Americana Music Awards. 

1. Find out if Def Leppard is interested in doing a country album.

Thanks to Jeremy Harris for these!

Scott Borchetta Christmas eCard

Country TwitterFAIL Nov. '12

Thanks to Ten-Pound Hammer for sending this one in!

Fun New Country Music Industry Game!

Country Horror Movie Posters: Taylor Swift

Tim McGraw Meme

Country Day October '12 Part 2: Parody Album Covers